Hey guppies,
Please help! Has anyone got any pictures of a bride and her sisters/friends/aunties wearing their old wedding lenghas on her mehndi, nikkay or walima day? I want my sisters to wear their old lenghas (with new shirts) to mine (inshallah) and need help convincing them!
I love you all in advance for your help.
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
I don't have any pictures to post, but my aunts wore their wedding lenghas to my wedding, and my cousin wore hers to her brother-in-law's wedding. It's pretty common in Pakistani families. Tell them it's your big day and that this would make you really happy. I'm sure they'll agree to do it if they know how much it means to you :)
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
funny how i thought brides in general did not like the idea of another girl wearing their bridal dress at their wedding.
My sil is planning to wear hers (2 year's old) at my wedding. I am not that bothered but if it was truly up to me then I wouldnt have advised her to do so.
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
^^ it's how you dress it up that makes a world of a difference.
She can play it down and not steel the limelight.
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
I want my sisters to wear their old lenghas (with new shirts) to mine (inshallah) and need help convincing them!
What is their reason for not wanting to re-wear the wedding outfits?
Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
Thanks for your replies girls :)
All my sisters have children and have obviously lost their original shape from the one they had at their weddings- they're worried they're going to look strange in their lenghas. Secondly, one got married in 1990, the other in 1995 and the other one in 2008. They older 2 have mentioned how old their lenghas are and how outdated they'd look but for me- that's part of the charm! I've told them once they've had plain kurti/kameezain made, they'll look lovely but the older 2 don't agree. The younger one has also now started wearing hijab so thinks she'll look like a pagal in red if she wears her outfit :(
So far, here are the colours : the outfit I want to wear is gold/rust, older Baji lenghas are forest green, fushia pink and then red.
Any other idea how I can convince them? I've already said how it's my dream for them to wear their joras and vintage wedding necklaces, etc.
I desperately need pictures to show them!
I don't have any pictures to post, but my aunts wore their wedding lenghas to my wedding, and my cousin wore hers to her brother-in-law's wedding. It's pretty common in Pakistani families. Tell them it's your big day and that this would make you really happy. I'm sure they'll agree to do it if they know how much it means to you :)
Could you not blank out faces and post a photo? Or even PM one- I promise I'll delete afterwards desperate
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
I think you should let it go and respect their wishes. Maybe they were looking forward to having new suits and looking updated and in style, that suit their current shape and lifestyle. and yeah i'm sure the stuff from 1990/1995 is "cute" and "special" but if a close family member was getting married, many would want to go all out and wear something brand new/nicer than decades old stuff
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
All my sisters have children and have obviously lost their original shape from the one they had at their weddings- they're worried they're going to look strange in their lenghas. Secondly, one got married in 1990, the other in 1995 and the other one in 2008. They older 2 have mentioned how old their lenghas are and how outdated they'd look but for me- that's part of the charm! I've told them once they've had plain kurti/kameezain made, they'll look lovely but the older 2 don't agree. The younger one has also now started wearing hijab so thinks she'll look like a pagal in red if she wears her outfit :(
If you think old/outdated style from the 90's has a "charm"...then you should make your own wedding outfit the same way. Your sisters do not want to wear the outfits b/c they're insecure about their body due to pregnancy, and b/c the outfit is outdated. They're telling you directly that they will feel uncomfortable in those outfits. For you to keep insisting/trying to convince them otherwise is selfish IMO. Keep in mind that even if you manage to convince them....you can't make them feel confidant on your wedding day when they're out there mingling with all the guests.
This dream you have of seeing them again in their wedding joras...is this dream more important the making sure that your sisters are happy, and long with you, THEY also feel beautiful on your wedding day?
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
My friends wore their shadi joras to my wedding and looked amazing. Actually, the more dressed up you are the more close to the bride you are is what it translates too in Pakistani terms.
[quote="muspus, post:9, topic:325615"]
All my sisters have children and have obviously lost their original shape from the one they had at their weddings- they're worried they're going to look strange in their lenghas. Secondly, one got married in 1990, the other in 1995 and the other one in 2008. They older 2 have mentioned how old their lenghas are and how outdated they'd look but for me- that's part of the charm! I've told them once they've had plain kurti/kameezain made, they'll look lovely but the older 2 don't agree. The younger one has also now started wearing hijab so thinks she'll look like a pagal in red if she wears her outfit :(
If you think old/outdated style from the 90's has a "charm"...then you should make your own wedding outfit the same way. Your sisters do not want to wear the outfits b/c they're insecure about their body due to pregnancy, and b/c the outfit is outdated. They're telling you directly that they will feel uncomfortable in those outfits. For you to keep insisting/trying to convince them otherwise is selfish IMO. Keep in mind that even if you manage to convince them....you can't make them feel confidant on your wedding day when they're out there mingling with all the guests.
This dream you have of seeing them again in their wedding joras...is this dream more important the making sure that your sisters are happy, and long with you, THEY also feel beautiful on your wedding day?
[/QUOTE]
Ouch Paheli! A bit of a harsh reply, I think! My jora is very vintage from the 40's- 60's. I'm wearing my nano's gharara and my mum's kameez with a few other heirloom bits and pieces thrown in! I understand what you're saying about my sisters maybe not feeling their best/confident and I suppose I hadn't really fully given it that much thought. That is one of the reasons I opened this thread to help them see how something similar had been done by others and how it had worked.
Any pics, Guppans?
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
I went to a wedding reception this weekend where the bride wore an absolutely lovely red/gold outfit. She chose not to wear the dupatta on her head.
Unfortunately another young girl (who didn't appear to be close family) decided to wear what was obviously her own wedding lehnga in red/gold to the same event. And this girl decided that she WAS going to wear the dupatta on her head. Now I don't know if she did this because she typically wears hijab and needed to cover her head or because she just wanted to achieve a certain look but it was not a very attractive sight. So yeah....it really depends on HOW you wear the wedding lehnga at someone else's wedding.
muspus,
Are you having a theme at your wedding? If your own outfit is vintage and you want your aunts/sisters etc to wear their own vintage outfits, perhaps telling them that they will help you to enforce a certain theme would be a way to convince them?
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
Ouch Paheli! A bit of a harsh reply, I think! My jora is very vintage from the 40's- 60's. I'm wearing my nano's gharara and my mum's kameez with a few other heirloom bits and pieces thrown in! I understand what you're saying about my sisters maybe not feeling their best/confident and I suppose I hadn't really fully given it that much thought. That is one of the reasons I opened this thread to help them see how something similar had been done by others and how it had worked.
Any pics, Guppans?
No one's saying it can't work..it CAN work, IF the person wearing it is willing to! If they were willing to, it wouldn't be such an issue. But they're not so....
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
No one's saying it can't work..it CAN work, IF the person wearing it is willing to! If they were willing to, it wouldn't be such an issue. But they're not so....
^ This. I have no idea what pictures of other women re-wearing their wedding jora is going to accomplish. OPs sisters are not saying that the idea itself is bad.....they have personal reasons for not wanting to wear their shaadi outfit again.....a major part of seems to be that their bodies have changed due to pregnancy. Other women seen in pics may not have had the insecurities that OP's sisters have.
Re: Sisters wearing wedding lenghas on your wedding HELP!!!
Hey guppies,
Please help! Has anyone got any pictures of a bride and her sisters/friends/aunties wearing their old wedding lenghas on her mehndi, nikkay or walima day? I want my sisters to wear their old lenghas (with new shirts) to mine (inshallah) and need help convincing them!
I love you all in advance for your help.
My cousin's son's wedding..all the ladies who were immediate relatives of the groom, ie Mum, Aunts, sisters, SIL, and immediate cousins wore new and vintage style ghararas and lenghas at the mehndi. All had new shirts made, some wore the original 'gotta' dupattas, others had chunri style dupattas. They were aiming for a theme for that particular event, and they did it successfully.