Sincere question for men and married couples too

Lifestyle Relationships
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I have a friend who is very confused about a topic which is very much a taboo in our culture and perhaps any culture. I had no idea what to say to her so I thought I would ask people out here.

Sorry if this topic is not appropriate for this forum, mods please remove if you feel this thread should not be here, but this is a sincere thread and I don’t mean to offend anyone, just need some anonymous advice for a friend.

It’s about ‘those’ dreams. The kind that only men have ( at least I think only men have them) I think they are called wet dreams but please correct me if I’m wrong. A girl I know is concerned because her husband who she has lived with so far for about 6 months has had these dreams in the middle of the night. I’m married too and she asked me for advice but i just didn’t know what to tell her. I know very very little about these dreams too. She says he has had them twice in 6 months.

She says she doesn’t understand why they happen and to cut a long story short, she is concerned, I think she feels that twice in 6 months for a married man is a lot, and this leads me to the sincere question in the title of this thread- is this normal ?? I would like to hear from men, married and unmarried, but also from married women. Does this happen a lot, or is my friend right to be concerned and worried. She thinks it might be her fault.
Also why do they happen, what kind of dream causes it to happen. And also, men, does it happen for any particular reason? My friend wants to know if it happens for no reason or if it only happens if there is a problem of some kind.

Again sorry if this thread is not appropriate, this is not something we could ask people about face to face so I thought this would be the best place for anonymous, real-life advice (which you don’t get by just searching the Internet). My friend is really worried.

Any advice, explanations or experiences would be appreciated.

P.s I know this topic can be irresistible for some people who would like to post sarcastic or silly replies, but please sincere and serious replies only. This is a sincere question

Thanks a lot :slight_smile:

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

I don't know much about this either sequin. But I'm sure your friend doesn't need to worry. I wish I could be a bit more help lol! I hope some people will come to give you advice soon.
Tell her not to worry, It seems pretty normal to me I think but I have no experience of this, sorry!

Somebody come and give her some advice please ! Lol :)

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Wet dreams are normal, especially during puberty. I'm afraid I don't know much about the topic, since I'm not a guy. Tell your friend, if she is really concerned for her husband to go see a doctor. If thats to awkward for him, look it up online (google, bing, whatever search engine you use). There are plenty of resources available to help them understand. Hope that helped

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

I've never heard of this or had this. Sounds like a psychological problem or he's not getting enough of what he obviously desires.

(Had to search what a wet dream was).

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

A happily married and satisfied married man should not have WDs.
As someone said above he might not be getting enough of what he desires.
Even if he is having those there is nothing to worry about,it is not any kind of disease or syndrome.
If he is not worried about them then he knows all about them so no need to bring it into any kind of conversation unless someone is curious to find out what he is fantasizing about in his sleep? :)

Remember he has not control on his thought while he is sleeping so nothing to get mad about. :)

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

sequin, are you and the husband sexually active?

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

It's nothing to worry about. Although wet dreams are more common in guys around puberty - it still does happen in a small % of men much later in life.

When we sleep our body is relaxed and for some men/women that means getting aroused. But if he is not sexually intimate with his wife and doesn't have a healthy sex life in his marriage - and he feels his desires aren't being fulfilled then this can be a cause as well.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Normal but he is married looks like he is not getting enough.:blush:

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Oh yaar logon, khudaa ke wasstay, now if something happens to a guy even when he is sleeping, people have concerns about his loyalties.

Wet dreams do happen to younger people because of high testosterone levels, but it has very little to do with how horny or unsatisfied the person is. It has to do with sleeping position. When men sleep in belly down position, their groin is sandwiched between the mattress and their body. Over night, because of breathing, it's getting caressed (sorry for the graphic details), which causes stimulation, erection and then ejaculation. This is the reason why prophet recommended not to sleep in that position.

One thing to be noted is that not every "accident" means that person was having an erotic dream. Many times, in your dream, you just feel that you have to urinate real bad and then you did, only to wake up to find out that you actually did not 'urinate' (oh sush up queer and X2 ... & TS)

OP, just have your friend ask her husband to sleep on his back. It's a healthy sleeping posture anyways.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Like what other have said above, its all normal.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

This. Your friend and her husband are not very much s3xually active. Still normal. No need to make it an issue

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

I am impressed , you seem to have a Ph.D on this topic. :slight_smile:
By the way OP wanted opinion of average Joe who might or might not have to deal with this kind of situation not a scholarly article if OP needed that OP could google it.:smack:

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Never heard about trying t urinate in dream and then having something like that. But twice in 6 months is nothing alarming, remember in 6 months his wife will be out of action for 6 weeks or may be more. And it can happen even in active men.

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Yaani keh arz liya hai...

Raat tum khwab mein aayeen
.
.
.
Raat tum khwab mein aayeen
Ihtelaam ho gaya..
.
.
Tumhari bhi izzat bacch gayee
Apna bhi kaaam ho gaya...

Nawazish.

Seriously though, a quick google search would tell you that it has not much to do with how jiggy they are getting or anything.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

WAH WAH , chirkeen ka deewan a shareef hay Kia app Kay pass.

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And you seem to be primary failed in this topic :frowning:

I know, I know what you are saying about detailed explanation, but I wanted to set the record straight about this topic.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

lol errr no me and the husband definitely are NOT sexually active- seeing as we are talking about somebody else’s husband here ! :smack:

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Lol.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

Also I think it's pretty obvious that the husband and wife are 'active' in that way- hence the concern and anxiety of the wife. If they were not active then that would explain everything and she wouldn't be worried. But she is because she can't explain it.

Thanks to everyone for the serious replies so far. It seems like it is quite normal and not something for her to worry about. I think I will tell her not to worry, and maybe to speak to her husband about it if it continues to bother her.

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Re: Sincere question for men and married couples too

What would that accomplish? Its not something he has control over.