The tired doctor was awakened by a phone call in the middle of the night.
“Please, you have to come right over,” pleaded the distraught young mother. “My child has swallowed a contraceptive.”
The physician dressed quickly, but before he could get out the door, the phone rang again.
“You don’t have to come over after all,” the woman said with a sigh of relief. “My husband just found another one.”
A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit.
One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home.
When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.
“Who are you?” he asked.
“I’m the Devil,” she responded.
“Well, come on home with me,” he said, “I married your sister.”
A little girl goes to visit Santa at the Mall. When it is her turn she sits on his lap and Santa says “Have you been good?”
Little Girl, “Yes, Santa, very good.”
Santa, “What would you like for Christmas?”
Little Girl, “I want Barbie and G. I. Joe.”
Santa, "G. I. Joe? Doesn’t Barbie come with Ken?
