On a Plumbers truck: We repair what your
husband fixed.
On the trucks of a local plumbing company:
Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
Pizza shop slogan: 7 days without pizza makes
one weak.
Another Pizza shop slogan: Buy our pizza. We
knead the dough.
Sign over a gynecologist’s office: Dr. Jones, at
your cervix.
At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next
blow-out.
Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: Hello. Can we
help you pick your nose?
At a towing company: We don’t charge an arm and
a leg. We want tows.
On an electrician’s truck: Let us remove your
shorts.
In a non-smoking area: If we see you on fire, we
will take the appropriate action.
On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push.
At an optometrist’s office: If you don’t see what
you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.
On a taxidermist’s window: We really know our
stuff.
In a podiatrist’s office: Time wounds all heels.
On a fence: Salesmen welcome! Dog food is
expensive.
At a car dealership: The best way to get back on
your feet - miss a car payment.
Outside a muffler shop: No appointment necessary.
We hear you coming.
In a veterinarian’s waiting room: Be back in 5
minutes. Sit! Stay!
At the electric company: We would be delighted if
you pay your bill. However, if you don’t, you will
be.
In a restaurant window: Don’t stand there and be
hungry. Come on in and get fed up.
In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive
carefully. We’ll wait.
At a propane filling station: Tank heaven for little
grills.
And don’t forget the sign at a Chicago radiator
shop: Best place in town to take a leak.
Lawn Mower shop: Lawn Enforcement Headquarters.
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