Signs That You are Too Drunk

Signs That You are Too Drunk

                Signs You are too Drunk

                You loose arguments with inanimate objects.

                You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from 
                falling off the earth.

                Job interfering with your drinking.

                Your doctor finds traces of blood in your
                alchohol 
                stream.

                Career won't progress beyong Senator from 
                Massachusetts.

                The back of your head keeps getting hit by the 
                toilet seat.

                Sincerely believe alchohol is the elusive 5th
                food 
                group.

                24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case- 
                coincidence? - I think not!

                Two hands and just one mouth... - now
                THAT'S a 
                drinking problem!

                You can focus better with one eye closed.

                The parking lot seems to have moved while
                you were 
                in the bar.

                You fall off the floor...

                Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.

                Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a 
                burger, screw dinner!

                Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.

                At AA meetings you begin: 'Hi my name is...
                uh...'

                Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

                You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear
                is in 
                the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.

                The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...

                You think the Four Basic Food Groups are
                Caffeine, 
                Nicotine, Alchohol, and [Women or Men].

                Every night you're beginning to find your 
                roommate's cat more and more attractive.

                Roseanne looks good.

                Don't recognize wife unless seen through
                bottom of 
                glass.

                That damned pink elephant followed me home
                again.

                Senators Kennedy and Packwood shake their
                heads 
                when they walk past you.

                I'm as sober as a judge.

                The shrubbery's drunk from too frequent
                watering.

                You wake up screaming 'TORO TORO
                TORO!' in the 
                middle of the night.

“even if u r not hungry just be greedy”