Signs of an abusive relationship

Lifestyle Relationships
1

With this definition of an abusive relationship I think at least 95% Pakistani couples are in one . Do you think this definition cannot be applied universally ? or we can just consider it was a norm of society and accept it as it is ?

2

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

I hope the definition applies to both.. guys and girls. I am definitely not in an abusive relationship.. Don't know about him.

3

Jigga please!

4

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

95%!! dude where do you get your stats from?

I am part of a 'pakistani' couple and no we don't batter each other on a regular basis. Only sometimes when it's the time of the month lol Kidding.

5

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

:eek:

i guess i do agree with the fact that if these are signs of an abusive relationship then a lot of them are in one, however 95% seems like a lil stretch :k:

6

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

95%, u mad?

Well i most certaintly dont walk on eggshells around him...where are these stats from?

7

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

There's nothing wrong in having a little fear in your heart. Overconfidence is what makes people mess up sometimes. But that fear shouldn't be like your legs are shaking and you're hyperventilating kind of fear but more like "I know he doesn't like this so maybe I shouldn't do it" kind of fear. It builds respect. Too much freedom doesn't bind a relationship.

But the kind of statistic that is, is an exaggeration...like most statistics.

8

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

it is an exaggeration to drill home a point and thats fine but yeah i don't think these kinds of relationships are that prominent in the west but yeah back home there are quite a few cases where the husbands just go berserk if one lil thing goes wrong. I also agree with niksik that you should have some sort of respect for each other's opinion, likes and dislikes and its perfectly normal to have that.

9

I would substitute fear with love. "I know he doesn't like this so maybe I shouldn't do it ... " and you don't do "it" out of love for your spouse.

It's very old school mentality, that fear builds respect. You see this in a lot of parent-child relationships. They would rather a child fear their father and somehow that equates into respect for their father (cause they are too scared of what will happen if they screw up).

love builds respect. not fear.

10

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

I guess I am in an abusive relationship with my professor!

11

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

Well, no one in a healthy relationship really fears their partner to the point where they're walking on egg shells because of them.

The stats are a bit exxaggerated but what Nomi means is that by this definition most couples might be in an abusive relationship.

12

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

maybe not 95% but maybe a lower number.

I agree yes there is a component of "watching what you say" or "not trying to get the other one riled up" in MOST desi marriages.

13

Guys guys calm down I said " I THINK it is 95%" .

But main question is that according to this definition most or majority of pakistani couples are in an abusive relationship . I might be wrong about it , but this is exactly something we are here to discuss .

So the question again is , if we can apply this definition on each and every couple or does it differ ?

:)

14

by this definition, i will call it just unhealthy relationships.. Not abusive

15

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

I may be pessimistic about Pakistanis, but I don't think the number is as high as 95%

16

To be honest PCG I think you will have your guy shaking in his boots in your presence :hoonh:

17

Re: Signs of an abusive relationship

You'd think, but I'm the sweetest thing ever. Really.

18

All roses have thorns PCG....:p