Re: Should I go with him?
For the record hareem01 will not be 30 for a few years yet ... She thinks she is older than she really is ... :)
Re: Should I go with him?
Okay I dont really need to add much here. Niksik pretty much summed up what I was thinking as I was reading through your thread.
I actually think you have a lot going for yourself hareem Mashallah. Just read through so many of the threads here and look around you.
You have a loving family.
You have a supportive husband who at least tries to communicate with you.
You have your children that will be your pride and joy someday Inshallah.
These are not small things…they’re huge. And you’re not even near 30 yet! 
Re: Should I go with him?
Dont go coz u r 
@ him
let him take someone else 
Re: Should I go with him?
Go! You need a break!
Re: Should I go with him?
wait guys!!! … what is this obsession with 30???
who, when, why did anyone come up with this arbitrary deadline for achieving success???
assuming one reaches their own definition of success by 30 … what then? …
hareem … I think you hold yourself back by placing such nebulous self-impositions.
Re: Should I go with him?
Like Reha said you have so much to be thankful for mashAllah. most of all a loving husband who you can trust and is a good muslim. I think like your husband said this is a matter of you not finding the right friends and I can totally understand that because I have difficulty making friends too.
Re: Should I go with him?
regardless of your anger at your husband, i totally understand where you are coming from. I have started to breathe since my 2 year old started day care. Before that, i had absolutely no time for myself at all whatsoever and my inlaws have always been with us for the past few months. I was starting to resent my husband and the fact that he could spend time at work without us, fully realizing that he wasnt certainly having a picnic there. He tried to give me time by myself a few times here and there but usually he forgot how much i needed it. So i totally understand where you are coming from. That and the fact that you are homeschooling your kids so you never get a break, kudos to you! In our situation, i had to demand time for myself and it didnt always work out in my favor.
Also, not having a career also saddens some of us. I know raising kids is an important task but mental simulation or meaningful conversation with an adult is not a gunah. People forget how hard it is for stay at home moms who want to go out and work not out of necessaity but for mental stimulation. Its not a bad thing and certainly does not mean we are ungrateful.
Re: Should I go with him?
lol! you guys are so cute :)
Deep down you know you want to go ;)
Just don't let him get off the hook so easy though, make him go out of his way to pamper you on the trip.
Re: Should I go with him?
Salam you guys
Thanks for all the support ... even those who were slightly demonising me ... because it is working ... she is feeling much better ... I guess she just needs to feel that she has a way out of her rut and you have helped her realise that ...
Love to all
Re: Should I go with him?
I just read this thread but I agree with Niksik what she has said. Hareem you are such a sweet girl, you organize everything really well from home schooling kids to blogging and sewing. All I want to say is summerized by Shakepeare " Expectation is the root of all heartache" .
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Re: Should I go with him?
from what i can make out, she basically needs a bit more of time to do what she wants to do, and to figure out what she wants to do in that time so she feels satisfied.
hareem, make a list of things you want to do. have psyah or someone else watch the kids for an hour a day while you do that. give me your prozac, and any other happy pills, thanks.
RUPAYHALWA YOU ARE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Re: Should I go with him?
^lol....thanks queer. I do keep a list of everything that I need to do with kids as well as a list of grocery, a list of other items for future use and besides this I do have a daily schedule to follow that includes my exercise routine and studies but when I'm stressed I don't follow it because I'm either too tired or too demotivated.
I'd like to sincerely thank everyone for their support, I'd bookmark this thread and whenever I'm down I'd read it. May God keep you all happy and safe.
Re: Should I go with him?
from what i can make out, she basically needs a bit more of time to do what she wants to do, and to figure out what she wants to do in that time so she feels satisfied.
hareem, make a list of things you want to do. have psyah or someone else watch the kids for an hour a day while you do that. give me your prozac, and any other happy pills, thanks.
RUPAYHALWA YOU ARE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I agree with Queer here hareem it seems like both of you have time managment problem which can be easily solved through discussing and making somethings priority and which can be taken light.
Re: Should I go with him?
palface is right. if you spend most of your day taking care of your boys (psyah included), you probably go to sleep thinking "what have i done today?? my life is ticking away and i'm not doing anything", even though you have probably done more useful stuff than 99% of other people. and don't think it doesn't happen if you are doing other stuff, like working or studying (things for yourself), those with personalities that want to achieve will always feel that they are not doing enough or don't have enough time. my brother is a classic example of this and it makes him grumpy a LOT. you just need to focus on what you have done and then whatever queer said.
ps. why are you going to bham?
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Go with him and make him pay for all your shopping.. shop lots and ignore him.
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Im upset with my husband too and love him terribly. I hope it gets better! :(
Re: Should I go with him?
which area of the uk are you in?
Are you in area with not many pakistani families?