because my husband before our marriage was going to marry someone else, a really good, humble, religious, educated girl but didn’t 'cause he preferred me over her?
So how should I look at it? Should I feel guilty and sorry?
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
how would you describe yourself in comparison to that woman. :p
On the other hand..to be honest destiny does play a hand in deciding who we end up marrying. So it had to be you. And psyah bhai obviously liked you alot. So there's no point in feeling guilty at all. :)
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
how would you describe yourself in comparison to that woman. :p
On the other hand..to be honest destiny does play a hand in deciding who we end up marrying. So it had to be you. And psyah bhai obviously liked you alot. So there's no point in feeling guilty at all. :)
I think she's a much better person than me and that makes me feel awkward.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
You should be proud of the fact that he chose you over the girl YOU (not him) think could have been his better partner.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
I think she's a much better person than me and that makes me feel awkward.
tou ab kara do doosri shaadi aur aapnay aap per proud ho jao
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
wise ppl dont live in the past, instead they extract good out of it and apply it in their present to make a better future.
he could marry someone (that could be your alter ego), but He Didn't.
for a change you can also act good, humble, religious, educated girl and still be an exciting, fun, full of life woman.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
I think she's a much better person than me and that makes me feel awkward.
You know what my hubby had been shown potential rishtas for about 4-5 years each time he visited Pakistan. And he was thoroughly fed up of all of them. And some of them were like really good looking way better girls. He ended up saying 'yes' to me just after a visit. And I felt really awkward about that in my initial engagement phase. I kept thinking that am not as good as others and that he might have made a hasty mistake :D
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
You should be proud of the fact that he chose you over the girl YOU (not him) think could have been his better partner.
I never met her until last year when we moved in this area and found out that she lived quite close so we became sort of friends....she married someone from Pakistan and her life seems to be a struggle coz she has to work and everything, she has kids too but she doesn't seem so happy about her marriage and each time I meet her I get this guilty feeling inside me.....like I snatched her dreams from her.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
You know what my hubby had been shown potential rishtas for about 4-5 years each time he visited Pakistan. And he was thoroughly fed up of all of them. And some of them were like really good looking way better girls. He ended up saying 'yes' to me just after a visit. And I felt really awkward about that in my initial engagement phase. I kept thinking that am not as good as others and that he might have made a hasty mistake :D
hehe....it all comes down to the kismet I guess.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
sorry? might be -
guilty? no. I dont see any reason to be guilty on things which are not in person's own control.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
I never met her until last year when we moved in this area and found out that she lived quite close so we became sort of friends....she married someone from Pakistan and her life seems to be a struggle coz she has to work and everything, she has kids too but she doesn't seem so happy about her marriage and each time I meet her I get this guilty feeling inside me.....like I snatched her dreams from her.
you didn't exactly snatch her dreams from her. Who knows if she had married your husband instead of you, she could have had a worse life in terms of compatibility, understanding and alot more things. Everything happens for a reason and that too the best one. So instead of feeling awkward you should just pray for her happiness and be thankful for such a wonderful family Allah has given you MA :)
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
How many years ago was this? If its more than 2 years you are wasting your time thinking about retarded stuff.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
^urgh....I'm friend with that girl now and I know she's not happy....but yeah I can't do anything about it now.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
as my mom would say, matches are made in heaven!! you two were destined for each other, no matter what!!Allah Taals is the Best of Planners so He planned it all for you two, it's not like people have much control over such things!!!
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
You should feel lucky and blessed about your marriage, and if you think she's unhappy, make dua for her.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
Peace hareem01
Why are you so sad? The prophet Muhammad (SAW) told us that we are all leaders ... he gave each Muslim the rank of leader ... and when we think about it we each have a role to play ... even those Muslims who have no dependents ... they are leaders for their own selves ... So as leaders what do we have to do?
Do we choose the easy life? Or do we lead?
May Allah (SWT) reward you for your humble attitude ... this in itself is being religious - do you realise that?
Besides I would like to boast a little ... I have always been given remarks from others that "I have a good sense of choice" ... You are my choice. Now do you dislike that because you can't live up to my expectations? Or do dislike that because when I make small reminders - they make you feel guilty?
Do you not want to me be a good leader? Perhaps I can learn to be a better one ... so please pray for me.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
Cook some tasty sooji ka halwa and send it to her with 6 naan and a thankyou note.
Rest, give treat to hubby darling… with a napkin to wipe tears. 
Khushi ke ansoo . pata nahi lagta, haina ?
Rah peya Jaaney te Wah peya janey 
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
suji ka halwa…
huh? leaders? kuch samajh nahi aa rahi.
ghar a ker batana.
Re: Should I feel proud or guilty?
Easy … a good leader takes on a challenge … doesn’t let difficult circumstances defeat him/her and rises to the challenge out of a sense of duty … considering it honourable … you will find much of the most difficult things in your life — are what you actually consider the most important … or are related to the most important things. Ok I’m coming home … wassalam