A person who got married with her cousin and was pretty much pressurized into it. Lets call her Bushra.
Her sister was explicitly forced to marry the brother of her husband. Bushra’s husband moved from Paksitan soon after their nikkah but her sister didn’t invite her socalled husband and claimed for divorce and eventually did get divorced from him.
They are both paternal and maternal cousins and the girl’s father has provided for her husband’s family while they were kids - ever since he came overseas, 35 yrs. Now Bushra’s mother in-law namely her khala and taayi is claiming for half of the house they have been living for free in all those years. It is Bushra’s father who earned money, bought the whole thing so it is not a common family property. But she is using the divorce issue and the fact that Bushra is married to her son to blackmail Bushra’s parents.
Now Bushra’s parents have had enough and they had huge fights with her mother in law, who is also their sister/bhabi. They came back from Pakistan recently very very aggressive and Bushra’s mother in law has in meanwhile tried eagerly to brainwash her son to be against Busra’s parents. Bushra’s husband is though very mad at his mother cuz of her behaviour with Bushra’s parents and also cuz she has been claiming for loads of money from her son and he found out she has been lying to him etc.
Bushra’s husband has been showing very ambivalent reactions in this issue and Bushra feels that she is stuck in between her parents and husband. Last night her father and husband had an arguement and her husband was really pissed off.
She sent me text messages that she is really tired of it all and would wish her parents would show concern to her situation as well instead of arguing with her husband. She has suffered a lot during all the years her sister was claiming divorce and once after the divorce, her husband was not normal at all with her or her parents.
I dont know what to advice her. In her family, the eldest sister has lots to say but she is very emotional and not very compassionate with other siblings as she uses each situation for improving her marriage etc. She is also married to a cousin so there are many dependencies in the family. This sister encourages the parents against Bushra’s husband instead of solving the issues and show some responsiblilty as the eldest child.
She has one brother and the parents would listen to him but he is quiet in all this and as he recently returned from Pakistan, he is pretty much effected by what he expereinced there.
What can I advice her to do? stop coming to her parents for a while so her brother can calm down her parents meanwhile? or would that be a bad move under the above mentioned cicumstances??
