To what extent do the concepts of sharam and hayaa hurt or benefit attempts to solve problems related to sex in our society?
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
Can I have examples of a society related to sex please
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
fixed.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
This is an excellent topic that deserves a discussion. I would come back to it in a few hours.
For starters, would it be fair to analyze it from a bird's eye view by looking at two different cultures - one where sharm-o-hayaa plays a significant role and another where it is not so taboo?
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
One thing we can look at is the lack of sharam-haya in North American society resulting in individuals engaging in premarital sex and if that isn't bad enough, it seems like the age at which they are doing it seems to be getting younger and younger. I think this partly has to do with sex education because the more you teach people about it, the more they want to investigate and try it out. I was watching a documentary in one of my classes back in high school about a town in the States that looked classy on the outside but STDs were very high among the youth and they found out that it was because they would play a game where they would all watch a bunch of x-rated movies and then try out whatever they saw. Also, I recently read an article about how a school board had to take out a book from its curriculum because some parents complained that it was going into too much detail about sex.
I have so much to say about this topic but I don't have time to continue and besides I doubt that you people want to read an essay.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
First define sharam, as different socities have different definitions of the actions and ideas of sharam/hayaa.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
Sex is there to enjoy, Sharam O Hayaa up to certain extent causes hindrance in the enjoyment.
Different positioins, different places yahilla yahilla
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
Well, good points. My main concern is when the concept of sharam actually prevents people from talking about issues that NEED to be talked about. Instead these issues are brushed under the rug.
Pre-marital sex is a minute problem compared to the rise of AIDS, rape incidents, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, infant/child molestation, etc.
If you ever even RAISE the topic in a group discussion at a party - no one wants to talk about. No wonder not much work is being done on these issues.
Some NGO's have delved in them in Pakistan, but awareness needs to be created in schools. Kids need to be aware of it, and they need to have some confidence in their society so that they can report a problem if it arises. Most kids wont say anything because they will be considered the "gandha" bacha or perverted kid.
That's just one example.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
I'm not talking about sexual positions...er...
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
oh well, unless you had a medical case where someone was injured due to a really weird position...but ah well...I think child molestation and rape are more of a widespread problem...
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
PCG , people dont bring up rape and so on discussions not due to sharm and haya, but Izzat. In fact I have rarely heard the words sharm/haya related to rape- if ever. Its completely different. People dont bring up sexual abuse and rape because they wish to forget it ever happend and they think that if they bring it up it will mar their reputation. Which is ridiculous because its happened, and hiding it is pointless. (alright not always but it doesnt change what took place.)
So far I have held such discussion about issues such as rape etc, with bros,parents, aunt, theres nothing about sharm or haya in that.
However as uh legallybrown brought up I think sharm or haya might be related to discussing sexual positions with your girlfriends over tea.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
Actually that is more of a dinner subject. Look everybody has different definitions of sharam.It is not fair to impose what you think is right on someone else. Not to pick on Irem, but this directly relates to her thread about the guy who is a pervert and has a nude calender or what not.
Re: Sharam & Hayaa
I didnt think these words were all that tough to understand.Nude pics have to do directly with sharm and haya .Dont tell me you need to post such pics.We need to discuss and bring out crimes such as rape and child molestation etc.We do not need to watch porn or put up such pics.
Nobody is imposing anything. And definitions might differ from person to person, their basic meaning I would hope - stay the same.