Salaam!
Below is a story I read recently and it felt totally deja vu to certain situations iv seen/experienced. Whats your take? Curb the extravagance to make a difference, or believe its God’s prerogative of bestowing people with unequal resources? If given the opportunity, would you chip away from the ideal you’ve had in your mind to give for the basic necessities of others? Or justify it by simultaneously contributing to charity as well?
Yushay dragged himself home with a heavy heart; threw himself on the bed, took a few deep breaths and tried to shake Basheera off his mind. Basheera had been clinging to his son Akram’s leg, not letting it go while Akram’s body dangled from the ceiling. Dr.Yushay had a real tough time detaching Basheera from Akram’s body. He was now finding it equally difficult to detach Basheera’s image from his mind…that petrified face, those stoned eyes. Akram, his 24 year old son had freed himself from the woes of this world by hanging himself – suicide. He was forced to do so because of the paltry loan that he was not able to return – Rs. 15,000. He left his old parents to breathe all alone in this world. Basheera had come to collect his son’s body after Yushay was done with the post mortem. Yushay had averted his gaze from Basheera’s face. He couldn’t bear to see the old man’s face; and now that face was lodged in his mind; that petrified look, those stoned eyes.
A knock at the door brought him back to present.
“Yushay, awake son?” asked his mom.
“Jee Ma, I m awake” He sat up and forced a smile as his mom entered.
“I wanted to show u these. Here, have a look” His mom sat down on his bed and handed him a packet.
He opened it and discovered some printed cards inside.
“What’s that Ma?” he asked; his tone curiously indifferent.
“Doctor Sahab, aap ki shadi k card chhap ker aa gaye hain..aur kia hai !!” laughed his Ma, tousling his hair affectionately.
“Shadi k card, Ma? Why do we need shadi ka card when we have all the cell phones, internet, ipod..” he protested weakly.
“Hain? card tu chhaptay hain na jaan. Kese bulayega logon ko. Ja so ja..thak gaya hoga” his mom got up to leave.
"Ma, how much did it cost?” Yushay asked.
“Rs. 15,000 only” smiled his mom and left.
15,000. Pandra hazar. A man lost his life for pandra hazar. He closed his eyes and massaged his temples. Hehad to take a Lexotinil to get himself to sleep that night.
“Zardari ko neechay utaro..hum ghareebo’n ka khoon choos leeya hai..manhoos..ghareeb mar raha hai..bachon ko dene k leeye roti nahi..zardari tooooooont tooooooont” .
Yushay had had enough. He switched the TV off in utter disgust, tossed the remote aside and headed outside to the lawn to find some peace and quiet. He found his father sitting in the lawn with a bunch of men engrossed in some appearing-to-be-important discussion. They were getting up to leave just as Yushay emerged.
“Who were these people, Dad?” he said as he sat next to his father on the lawn chair.
“Tent wala and qumqumay etc and people for home decor”
“What is all this for?”
“Doctor sahab,” said his father, “I intend to marry again”.
As his Dad guffawed, immensely enjoying his own joke, Yushay also let out a small smile.
“Wow that’s cool, Dad”
“Suniyey barkhordar, mere aklotay betay ki shadi hai..sari dunia ko pata chalna chahyeay”, said his father in a mock-serious tone.
“Dad, I have been insisting for so long that…”
“Son, I have an urgent meeting to rush to. You have a look at these brochures and see which floral combinations you would want on the big day", his father cut short his protest and got up.
“Khanum itni sardi mein bachay ko sweater nahi pehnaya? Bemar par jayega." Yushay paused at the entrance of the lounge to inquire from his maid who was cleaning the room while her 8 year-old son was roaming around in a half torn T-shirt.
“Sahab, sweater ho ga tau pehnao’n gee na..”, she said sadly as she took off her shawl and wrapped it around her son.
“Bhaiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..”, his younger sisters Sophia and Laiba ran in to him.
“Whoa! Easy girls! Looks like you two have found a treasure!” he smiled at their excitement.
“Bhabi’s bridal dress has arrived!” both of them exclaimed together. They held up for his inspection a delicate yet intricately embroidered Bridal dress- deep red with bottle green embroidery.
“Isn’t it a bit too much?” Yushay couldn’t help thinking to himself as he fingered the fabric.
“Bhaiya, don’t you like it?”,Laiba asked, looking at his expressions.
"Laiba, come on yar! I’m not the one who’s going to wear it! But it’s beautiful,” he beamed. He didn’t have the heart to disappoint his sisters.
"Bhaiya, it’s designer’s wear. Initially they said it’s for 80,000 but we finally managed to bring it down to a mere 50.” Sophia announced proudly.
“50,000?” He gasped.
“ She is gonna wear such heavy stuff for a day – for a few hours let alone an entire day. Why so much extravagance, Ma? ", Yushay turned to his mother who had just entered the lounge.
“Meri bahu 5000 ka suit pehne gi kia? Aray larkay, wo aik successful doctor se shadi ker rahi hy, kisi thelay walay se nahin. Log kia kahain gay? Bawla hai tu. Sophia, Laiba chalo uthao kapray yahan say, tumharay bhaiya tau adam bezar hain.." , his mother said, shaking her head in exasperation.
“Aur Khanum ye tum kia khari tamasha dekhti rahti ho. Tum apna kaam kero.” , she said, turning sternly to the maid.
Yushay also turned around to see Khanum standing still with a strange, unfathomable look on her face. Her gaze was fixated on the bridal dress and the dusting cloth was dangling from her hand.
“Ma, Driver chacha k ghar khana bhijwa diya tha raat mein? Chachi bemar thi sub bhukay hon gay.." inquired Yushay.
"Haan Edhi Sahab, Bhijwa diya tha, tu akhri nek banda nahi bacha is dunia mein.” she said angrily. As the wedding date drew closer, the tension and workload kept his mom’s mercury at boiling point most of the time.
"Lagta hai aj meri amma naraz hain mujh say.” he lovingly flung his arms around his mom.
"As if u care for me, Yushay. Hasn’t your Islam taught you to respect the wishes of your parents?” she retorted angrily.
“Hahaha what’s in for “your” Islam or “my” Islam Ma.. Islam tu sub ka aik he hai na..” He laughed.
“Tu phir aik baat kahun? manay ga?”
" Jan hazir hai ma.. your wish is my command, my princess " , he said, as he kissed her forehead, trying to placate her.
" Chal ja..Ayla ko sunana yeh dialogues..tu mera aik he beta hai..kitnay saalon se is din k khwab dekh rahi hun..Ma ko apni shadi per do arman nikalnay day.."
He immediately guessed what was coming up but tried to maintain his composure.
“What’s the latest, Ma?”
"Choti si mehndi mayun ki rasm rakh lete hain..bus ghar ghar k log hon gay 50-60”
“50-60? Go ahead Ma..zaror kijyeay mein Abdullah k han ja raha hon..jub “meri” mayun mehndi ho jaye tu mujhe bula ljyea ga..”
“Dekha..I told u..tumhain mera koi khyal nahin. Maulvi sahib, I think you have missed reading Wa bil walideeni ehsana”
“My dear mom, Ap k ilawa sub mujhay Doctor Sahib kehtay hain.” , he joked.
“What’s going on here?” popped in his father.
“Nothing new. Your son shouting over mehndi mayun again”
“I never shouted, Ma”, he said quietly.
“Oh, forget him Mehrunnisa. Have u dispatched all the invitation cards?”
“Jee.”
“Good, this brings us down to 200 people for barat.”
“200 people for Barat? What on earth is happening here Dad?” Yushay asked.
“Why do u always over react Yushay as if u don’t know what’s going on around?"
“Yes, I don’t really know what you guys are up to. I have been making it clear for so many years that I want to keep my wedding simple. I am not even taking 20 people to Ayla’s place, let alone 200. This is way too much Dad. Why burden them?”
“Acha, way too much haan? Your dear father in law wants us to bring in an impressive Barat with us. Tumhari abhi jazbati umer hai. You don’t understand these matters. Ahista ahista samajh jao gy. I think right now the best way for you to deal with this all is to keep quiet and enjoy it”
"OK Dad, I’ll enjoy. The way it’s going on, I’ll really enjoy my wedding. Sure, Dad. No problem. Just enjoy” This time around, Yushay could hardly keep the bitter sarcasm out of his voice.
Yushay’s stomach was grumbling. He wanted to make it back home quickly but the signal turned red. As he drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, a shabbily dressed woman knocked at the window.
“Sahab mere bachay khareed lo.”
He didn’t believe his ears. “Kia khareed lun ??”
“Mere bachay, sahab”
“Dimagh sahi hai, bibi? Bachay Allah ki naimat hain. Khuda ka khauf kero aur in masoom phulon ko lay ker ghar jao.”
“Pait mein roti ho gee tu shukar karain gay na sahab. 2 din se kuch nahin khaya. Main bhuki marun gi, sath ye masum bhi bhukay marain gay”
Yushay was stunned. The signal had turned green. The cars behind him were honking frantically. He asked the woman and her two kids to get in the car quickly. He drove to the nearest market, bought a sewing machine for Rs.7000/- and as many grocery supplies as he could stuff in the car.
Dropping the woman at her shanty in the katchi abadi, he said, “Ab silai kerhai ker k pait palo apna aur apnay bachon ka. Phir kabhi mein is tarha road per na dekhon.”
The woman blessed him with duas as she stepped out of the car, her face beaming with happiness.
As Yushay drove off, he could still hear his stomach grumbling, but oddly enough he felt satiated and content. He smiled broadly to himself and headed towards home.
Yushay returned back to an empty house. His family was out shopping for the wedding. Their chef warmed his dinner and brought the tray to the lounge. Just then, his cell phone rang.
"Hiya What’s up, Doc?” , It was the chirpy voice of Ayla, his fiancée.
“Assalam O alaikum Ayla. How r you?”, he smiled.
“Im good, Yushay. Listen, tell mummy that I have booked the parlor and charges are Rs.21,000.”, Ayla said, jumping straight to the point.
“teen silaii machine” murmured Yushay.
“What was that, Doc?
“Nothing, Ayla. There’s some important issue I wanted to talk to you about.”, he said, pacing in the lounge.
" Ahaan..sounding serious doc..shoot"
" Ayla.. Every day children die of hunger, our neighbors sleep on an empty stomach, people commit suicide because they can’t feed their families. How do you feel about them ?? "
" Bad…really bad."
“Given a chance, what will u give to save a person who is about to commit suicide?”
“Everything..what r u up to Doc? Too many riddles today.”
“Ayla..The poor die because we are too busy merry making in our lives. We just don’t care.”
“Ummmm…”
“U know Ayla hamari masiyan apni bachion ki shadi kiun nahi ker pati’n ??? Kiun k hum nay itnay high standards set ker deeye hain shadi k, k woh log sochtay huay bhi dartay hain. Apne app ko hamaray standard tk late late. All this jahez, mayun, mehndi, baraat and what not. All this nonsense and expenditures.. Yeh sub kese theek ho ga?”
“Waqai Allah reham kare in gharibon per”
“Allah tau reham karega lekin hum kia karain gay? Who will bring the change, Ayla? Do u think the poor can transform the world?”
“Never.”
“Right, because the elite class is the trend setter of the society. You and me are the trend setters. Poor men are just the followers. Jub tak koi elite yeh step na lay, k despite having all the luxuries of life, despite having enough money to celebrate their wedding in Burj Arab..they do it with simplicity, they rukhsati-fy their daughters in the simplest manner. Tab tak koi change ana is just a dream.”
“Yushay, you are talking really different stuff today. I hope I didn’t dial a wrong number.”
“I may be disappointing u, Ayla. But that’s what I dream of. And who else should I dream with if not with my life partner?”
“OK, Carry on.”
“Marriage is an institute Ayla; not a burden. The happiness in these “ceremonies” which we try to hide ourselves with is so fake. People just want to conform to the existing norms of the society. Everything they do is tainted with a lust for admiration from people. They are afraid of the ‘zamana’. And this is the only thing that makes me different from them. They fear the world. I fear Allah Alone. That’s it, Ayla”
"Are u done Yushay ?? "
“I guess so. Your answer means the world to me Ayla. You are my last hope after Allah. I can’t fight the world without you. Together, I’m sure we can convince our families”
"Ahhh…relax Yushay. Take it easy. I think u think a lot. Can’t we take it easy? Have a chill pill and let the things happen as they r happening. If the poor is dying, we are not killing him; and if Allah has given us wealth its Allah’s fazal. What can we do? Allah has asked us to show the naimah, hasn’t He? Masiyan nahin afford ker sakti tau ker lain na saadgi se apni betiyon ki shadiaan.”
“Ayla..” Yushay was terribly shocked. He opened his mouth to say something but the word didn’t come out. “I thought u were not like this. You were different…”
“Oh, I am Yushay. But you are talking of impossibilities. I’m trying to bring you to reality. Even if we get together, our parents are not going to agree. Never. Look, you should not forget this wedding is very important for your parents you are their only son.”
“Is it the only logic everybody is left with? You defied the norms to observe Hijab in college. I thought you were a strong lady, Ayla.”
“Yushay, for heavens sake. How did my Hijab fit in this discussion? Now you’ll say that you’re expecting me to wear Hijab on my wedding day too!"
"So whats the big deal? Have u taken a day off from Allah? Has He given you special permission to do whatever you like on that day? "
" Yushay, I do respect your views and thoughts. I like you for them. But you have to remain moderate. I cant do hijab on my wedding. Aik din ki to baat hy. Dunya ko bhi deen k sath chalana hota hy. The middle path, you know. Don’t be unreasonable.”
“OK I won’t force you, Ayla. But look here, I..”
“No, Yushay, first you look here. I have not taken the “theka” to set the trends. The trends are already set. We are supposed to follow it. It’s not my issue as to who sleeps on an empty stomach and don’t even dream of me wearing hijab on wedding day. Can u really be that crazy?"
“Are we the slave of the trends then? What about being slaves of Allah?”
“Look Yushay, Take it easy. Don’t take it to heart. We are not responsible for the misery of entire world. We are about to embark on a new journey. We should forget all this and cheer up. Think about the new life ahead.”
Yes InshAllah! But can’t this new life be started making things easy for others?"
“What exactly do u want Doc? Stop the riddles and now get it out straight.”
"OK this is it. I bring 5 people, get the nikah filed, we receive blessings and dua and come home. Story finished. "
“What? You have really gone crazy Yushay. You are not living in stone age. Gosh man!!”
"Wait a second Ayla..listen..there r chances in life that u just get only once..ONLY ONCE Ayla. Think about it”
“Yushay, I gotta go. Talk to you later. Bye”
Ayla hung up.
Yushay looked at his dinner, lying untouched on the table. His appetite had totally vanished.
Dr. Yushay hesitated for a moment, said a silent prayer and knocked gently at his father’s study door after Isha.
“Come in.” His Dad called out.
His father was rolling up the prayer mat.
“Dad..”
“Yes, Yushay..”
“I wanna talk to you”
“Yes?” said his Dad, making himself comfortable on a sofa. Yushay plopped down on a nearby floor cushion.
"Were you offering Isha, Dad?”
“Hmm, Yes.”
“Who were u bowing down before, Dad ??"
"Going crazy again Yushay.. ? I was bowing before Allah.” said his father, frowning.
“Allah? Who’s Allah Dad?”
" Allah - your and my creator "
“That’s it, he created us and did nothing more?”
“Your and my sustainer..who provide us rizq..loves us more than 70 moms..keeps us going..”
“Ahaan..since He sustains us..gives us everything we have..and loves us..so He deserves to be loved by us more than anything..??”
“Yushay, I am sick of you.”
“I got that. HE deserves it.”
“Son, I am warning you. You are testing my patience. What’s your point?”
" HE is also the Law-Maker and He deserves to be obeyed the most"
“You are coming to your wedding”
"Yes, I am, Dad. Please hear me out. Our Lord, our sustainer forbids Israaf. He says do not over spend and what do we tell Him, Dad? Allah Pak, Log kia kahain gay? He forbids us to show off. And what do we tell Him, Dad ? “Come on Allah Pak, itnay baray doctor ki shadi hai?” HE COMMANDS us to avoid extravagance and we tell him “Allah Pak, zamanay ko b dekhna parta hai” He commands women to follow Hijab and we tell HIM “u gotta b Kidding Allah Pak, Hijab on wedding day ?? Its our BIG day” HE says if you’ll follow the majority on earth they will lead you astray for sure. We say come on Allah Pak we do not live in Stone Age. I don’t say things out of my own free will, Dad. It’s the Quran and Sunnah that I try to act upon and when people answer me back; who r they actually answering back to? and these Log Log Log-what did they do for us, Dad? Did they create us, do they sustain us?”
His father rubbed his chin thoughtfully and replied, “Look, Maulvi, It’s easy to shoot off fatwas. Log hamari majbori hotay hain. Don’t you have to live in this world?”
"Log hamari majbori hai, Allah hamari majbori kiun nahi? Who are these people, Dad ? Are they our sustainer? Do they pay our electricity bills? Do they manage our bank balance? Why is all our effort centred to please people? Who are these people that we can even ignore Allah for? It’s people’s job to talk. Let them talk.
“Aik society hoti hai. Circle hota hai. U gotta keep the connected with the social circle. Allah has ordained to fulfill huqooq-ul-ebad.”
“U fill huqooq-ul-ibad the “WAY” Allah has ordained. Sharing the food, lending a helping hand in need, sharing sorrows, seeing them on Eid. Which was is this to keep connected by calling Allah’s wrath” Yushay’s tone was getting weaker and weaker.
" Han, jub tumharee chachiyan aur taii amma tumharee ami ko batain sunanay ayein gee tu kerogay yeh taqreer un k samnay ?? Ur mom is not an orator, Mulvi Sahab. How will she tackle people ?? What is she gonna say when people askk kiun apnay betay ki shadi mein nahi lay k gayee. Sari zindagi tana marain gay. Tum ne tu deal nahi kerna hota na logon say"
“Mom would not deliver a speech Dad, she’ll just say she obeyed Allah. Allah will help Mom Dad, why would I ?? And they won’t remain angry forever. Mein mana longa unhain. Mein paon mein gir k mana longa.”
“Huhh..dialogue sunu zara is k..”
Nai Dad, I mean it. People are the main problem. Crowd. Gathering. But what to talk of them Dad, even if u throw the greatest party of all times they r gonna say " Oh Yushay k abba nay tu hamein khanay ka pocha he nahi…lift he nahi karaya" then why care about them. Do it right way and forget the people. They’ll talk for a day, week, year “Ohh see how those elite made their kids marry in the mosque? Khana nahi day sakte thay aik waqat ka, hamari shadi mein tu khoob kha k gaye thay”- and then they’ll forget. People are never satisfied Dad and we get sacred of people! The one who has bestowed us the wealth - yeh, the same wealth that we r spending in his disobedience- says
“Don’t get scared of people, get scared of ME”
Allah Pak, zamana kia kahay ga
Don’t get scared of peple, get scared of ME
Allah Pak, log batain karain gay
Don’t get scared of people, get scared of ME
Allah Pak, log zamana society mu’ashra custom ritual riwaj collegues co-workers friends rishtedar log LOG LoG LOG
Fa la takh-shawhum wakhshauni - so do not get scared of people and get scared of me.”
Yushay paused for a few moments waiting for his Dad to say something. His dad continued staring at him silently. Yushay took a deep breath and continued.
“Dad, I love u. You are my greatest asset. But I am very weak. I’m scared of Allah, Dad. I can’t stand up to him. I can’t challenge Him. Dad, I love u. I really do. I love u more than anything. But, I want to start my life setting trends. Making wedding easy for others. The way our Beloved Prophet did! If u make me marry simply, masi sakeena will b able to quote our example. And we’ll b blessed by loads and loads of duas from the less privileged class of our society. And what more do we want than dua? What better gift can one receive? What better foundations can be laid for my new life with Ayla?”
His father abruptly stood up. Yushay followed suit.
His father’s voice had an unusual tone: “ Tu mujhay samjha raha hai? Tu mera abba hy ya main tera abba hun?”
“Oh man! I’ve done it now. He’s furious” Yushay thought.
His eyes were downcast as he fumbled for words: “ Dad, I’m sorry. Maybe I got carried away in my passion. I didn’t mean to be rude or disrespectful. I just…”
His words trailed off as he looked up at his father and realized that he didn’t look angry or offended at all. Instead, his father had a gentle smile on his face and his eyes were twinkling.
“Yushay, I love you too!” he said, patting Yushay’s shoulder.
“Dad, I love you more. You’re my only Dad too” Yushay grinned from ear to ear.
That night at 3 a.m., the moon peered in at one of the windows of the huge bungalow. Today again, the moon witnessed that same radiant sight. The handsome, young man had placed his forehead on the ground in sujood. He was earnestly talking to his Allah, while all the world slumbered around him. Doctor Yushay was not one to give up easily!
Let marriage be an institute, not a burden.
Yeh Qasr-e-hawas zer-o-zabar kaun karega
Kernay ka ha yei kaam,magar kaun karega??
