How severe are the consequences if the female desides to break of the engagement in an arranged marriage, after the female says “yes” in the begining of the rishta?
Is it frowned upon in a strict muslim family, or are they willing to accept their daughter’s decision?
What if the reason is that there is someone else equally suitable for her, will the parents every accept it?
please share any related experiences.
Re: Sever Consequences
Sorry no personal experiences :)
Islamically speaking, no one is to be forced into a marriage. it's not allowed. If she don't like him well thas her choice.. she has every right to "haan" or "naa" at the guy. I' dunno bout after she's said yes..
Re: Sever Consequences
if by strict muslim family you mean that they follow the teachings of Islam in the right manner, then they wouldnt force her to marry someone she doesnt wanna marry in the first place.
Re: Sever Consequences
I don’t think (if they r religious) that it wud be frowned upon, bcos she is not married yet and can change her mind i suppose…however, in our culture it mite be…as ppl see the engagement as a big step and now it’s all set, ur just waiting for the wedding day to arrive…it has happened to two of my cousins, one guy and one girl…with the guy, it was his fiancee who broke it off. Supposedly cos she was tired of waiting for him to stand on his feet and she fell in love with someone else…the worst part was, that this girl was his cousin! He was heartbroken, but hey, life goes on…and then my girl cousin (who was also engaged to her cousin), their engagement was broken off mutually cos neither one of them wanted to leave the country they were living in…well a few yrs went by, and my cousin (the girl) finally realised she had a great rishta and that she wudn’t mind moving to that country afterall, so today they r married lolz…so i guess it depends on the family…it’s not a joke to start a relationship, esp. when it’s arranged so of course the families will not take it lightly when it is broken off…it’s always a sad thing.
Re: Sever Consequences
well..i broke off my engagement. i was engaged to my first cuzn. n then i realized how stupid my decision was so i told my parents…no way in hell will i marry into that family. my mom was on my side all along..of course..she’s the mother. n afterall it was her susraal. at first my dad disagreed n said i’m the one who agreed to it..n i never shouldve agreed to it if i didnt want it. but he was ok bout it later. yes there were probz coz of it..but hey..u gotta do wut u gotta do. its bout ur happiness..not the worlds happiness. loug to hamesha baatein banaate hain aur hameshaa batein banaayenge. it shouldnt matter.
my mom is a strict muslim (not an extremist) but she was ok bout it coz she understands. she wants my happiness. she could careless about wut ppl have to say or wut they think.
my dad was never happy with my choice. my mom wasnt so thrilled about it either. but they said if thats wut u want…then we’ll be happy for u. my elder 2 sis’s havnt had the best marriages. n so now they’re just extra careful bout everything. hence the reason they wanted me to marry w.in the family. thank god that didnt happn tho.
Re: Sever Consequences
^You have great parents, ma sha Allah!
Very often, even when a girl hasn't said no to a rishta, it's not liked if she says no, people start making all kinds of bad stories about why she said no, even if she doesn't have anybody else.
And sometimes it's like the parent's want some sort of strange revenge because their daughter didn't like their choice.
It all depends on your situation and your family, their mentality is more important than them being (usually so-called) religious.