When I read an incident, it clicked this question in my mind.
What if (Allah forbid) a women was raped and was in comma (or unconcious) for a long time. If after coming to her senses she finds out that she is in the hospital where she has given a birth to a boy. ( Some how the officials were not knowing the facts as they found her lying somewhere, pregnant and unconcious, at a stage when the most appropriate step was that she should give birth to the baby)
Now, what would she do with the baby. She might not be able to leave him as she has given him birth and she is his mother. She can also not adopt him as he might grow up to resemble his illegal father whose face she would never like to see?
I personally think she should not adopt him, but would she be able to deny her love as a mother, because where ever he would be she might not be able to keep her heart away from him. I think the best comment can be given by a women who is a mother herself, because she might know how does it feels like to be a mother or to have an illegal baby. Also could leaving him to orphanage might be a better option or sacrificing her feelings and pain and educating him to become a good human being in future ???
My personal feeling that in those circumstances she will not accept the boy. The love for the child grows up in parents with time after conception and birth. Suddenly if I wake up one day and find a child beside me and somebody claim thats its mine, well it will be very hard for me to accept.
In my own case when my wife was pregnant first time, I really did not feel a lot of love for the child until I felt the movement of the child during pregnancy. And after birth that love was multiplied million times over. So love for a child grows with time in the beginning it does not come suddenly.
It's my (male) persepective. Now women are different and may say different.
A woman falls in love with her baby as soon as she finds out she is pregnant (I know from experience - even though my pregnancies have ended in miscarriage) and the whole giving birth experience/pain melts away in minutes at the first glance of the child. Therefore, any woman would probably find it hard to give up a child that she had carried and nurtured within her body for 9 months.
I think it would be different if the woman had no recollection of the pregnancy due to being in a coma - ie hadn't experienced any of the pregnancy stages like movement/kicking etc
The added complication would be that the child would always remind the woman of her rape.
This is one of those situations that NOBODY can comment on unless they have had the experience themselves
I think it would be different if the woman had no recollection of the pregnancy due to being in a coma - ie hadn't experienced any of the pregnancy stages like movement/kicking etc
The added complication would be that the child would always remind the woman of her rape.
This is one of those situations that NOBODY can comment on unless they have had the experience themselves
@Sister. I feel sorry for the loss, but Allah (swt) knows better what is good for us and what is not and our mental capabilities are too limited to understand the wisdom behind every action of Allah.
This is one of those situations that NOBODY can comment on unless they have had the experience themselves
EXACTLY! its easy for us to say this and that, and make an opinion, but its different when you are going through such experience.
PS: Sorry for your loss, I really hope that one day Allah will reward you for this mishap.