how involved are you with your hubby’s family problems? we share all our problems but I feel a bit awkward asking him about problems that I kinda know are happening in his mom’s, brother’s, sister’s life simply because I feel like I may be intruding or getting too personal. I know these things affect him but he still never shares them with me. In fact, most of the time when he talks to his mom/sis/etc he’ll do it outside of the house or when I’m in the washroom or kitchen or something. Is this normal? To be honest, I dont really mind that he doesn’t wanna talk to them in front of me but I don’t want to be completely alienated from his family’s life either. Do you and spouse share each and everything going on in each other’s parents and siblings’ lives? Would you want your wife to ask about and offer support when there are some sort of issues or just to leave it alone?
OK so my hubby is the same...He actually rarely talks to his mom or bros, sis in front of me. He always go out and then call them. I also feel bit awkward asking abt their problems but mu case is different. We have some Major issues going in between our families and they both dont talk to each other so mayb thts y am bit hesitant.
One question i would like to add...How many of U biwi's actually call their Mil's, Sil's and how often and do u talk to them in front of ur hubby or u call them alone?
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that is kinda weird ... i think as ur husband he shohuld be sharing these probs with u
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May be good in a way , he doesn't want his family problem spill over in your life . He just being careful . But u can always advise him as a friend .
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I say dont ask if he doesnt want to share. May be its good for you both.
yeah i call his mom and sis and we all have a really good relationship. they're realllly nice and i love them but i just don't know why he doesn't talk to them in front of me. its wierd. i guess i also talk to them only when he's at work. but i think its just cuz of timing cuz i have to make sure its early in the morning here so they're home and awake when i call.
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This is a sensitive issue.
What about you? Do you tell him about your family's stuff?
I know some people don't want to mix the two. I know people in my life who won't share problems of one side with the other.
If you think about it, they are not directly your husband's problems. When they are, you will know about them. They are HIS family's problems.
I know the feeling though. It is uncomfortable and alienating, in a way.
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this is common..though am not married but my sis whoz married she never calls me when her hubby is around..she tries her best to call us (her family) wen my BIL is not around..this is bcoz shez more comfortable that way and we too...
Yeah Curious lady...This is indeed a sensitive issue.
I also Dont tell him ANYTHING abt my Family...But thts because i have some issues going On. Its very uncomfortable though. :(
Besides All this I do think both sides Must tell each other or share the Joys or problems. Afterall they r Mian Biwi.
how involved are you with your hubby's family problems? we share all our problems but I feel a bit awkward asking him about problems that I kinda know are happening in his mom's, brother's, sister's life simply because I feel like I may be intruding or getting too personal. I know these things affect him but he still never shares them with me. In fact, most of the time when he talks to his mom/sis/etc he'll do it outside of the house or when I'm in the washroom or kitchen or something. Is this normal? To be honest, I dont really mind that he doesn't wanna talk to them in front of me but I don't want to be completely alienated from his family's life either. Do you and spouse share each and everything going on in each other's parents and siblings' lives? Would you want your wife to ask about and offer support when there are some sort of issues or just to leave it alone?
You need to build that comfort level with him. Do let him know that if he wants he can share his feelings, his worries with you but if he doesnt want to you had respect that too. You see it is possible that it may not be him but his family who doesnt want their worries to be disclosed to you. So it is important that your comfort level is with your husband and his family too.
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Im not involved...coz the thing is they keep secret everything from me..cos they think i might tell all secrets to my mom/family
that is kinda weird ... i think as ur husband he shohuld be sharing these probs with u
yes.. i believe in the begining its kind of Ok but as the time goes by they should start sharing the 'secrets' with eachother.... if u dont do it, that means what 'u dont trust your spouse'??
its funny they (husbands) want you to be the 'part of the family' since day One whenever it comes to 'serve' his family/friends.... but when it comes to sharing the secrets u r still being treated as an outsider for years....
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my hubby do the same all the time..before i used to share my family problems with him but he endedup telling all to his mother and his mother wud tell all this to different aunties..so i stop sharing my family problems with him...but he always talk to his family out side home..even if he is at home they call him on his cell phone and he wud just walk out side...
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my husband talks with his family when I m there and even if im not around he always fills me in about what they talked.I on the other hand do the same also.
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Ive never done this...spoken to my family in secret. I expect the same from him.