Second or more time parents

What would you differently from the first baby?
I am talking about caring for yourself, your new baby and also your first born.

Re: Second or more time parents

Me:
- Start wearing the shaping belt pretty much straight away
- Not get too stressed about what people say and how they feel
- Express myself more sanely and maturely to people around me
- Not to let trivual things get the better of me

First born:
- Get munchkin involved with things (nappy changes, bath times etc.); make her feel like she is REALLY important (which she is) and things cannot function without her
- Give munchkin lots of hugs and kisses (and try hard not to get frustrated)

Other important stuff:
- Listen more to the hubby rather than my emotions

Re: Second or more time parents

Good one sadzzz..

Me :

  • Gonna be more vigilant about my diet this time (I was eating good but didn't let go of the carbs so I still carried the weight till Jr. was 10 months old) This time no carbs and more focus on clear soups.

  • Get a personal trainer after the 6 week period, inshAllah. even if it is only 3 hours per week.

  • Take care of my skin, clothes and focus on me and family rather than household chores.

Second Baby

  • Give lots of massages, story time, and try not to get frustrated at night time feedings.

First Born

  • Lots of play time. Jr. might have issues sharing dad with new baby so planning on handing over new baby to my mother while we focus on Jr.
  • Involve Jr. in taking care of new baby.

I am still trying to think how I can do housework, ironing, cooking with 2 kids and not get frustrated with Jr. while he tries to get into cabinets, fridge and other things.

Re: Second or more time parents

^ jub time ayega sub ho jayega (read: karna paray ga) enjoy your time till then !

Re: Second or more time parents

wow good stuff :k:

I dunno if i can get a personal trainer, but I am goign to cut down on carbs as soon as bubba is born and start on soups too. Its just I really do not like the yakhnee that gets fed to me.. I dont mind chicken soup.. but the yakhnee on its own seems so oily and salty… uugh.

And thank goodness summer will be just around the corner, I can live on fruit!

Re: Second or more time parents

third time around I would not use pregnancy as an excuse to eat anything and everything that I want. I would eat healthier during my pregnancy.

Re: Second or more time parents

I am doing the opposite, with my first born i ate healthier, i was very concious about creating a balanced meal with servings of protien, carb, veges fruit and i took my multi vitamins regularly. now i am living on grab and go what ever i see when i open the fridge i just quickly grab it and put it in my mouth.
I don't have weight issues, I was just 4 kg over my pre pregnancy weight after the delivery but yeah i feel very weak and dizzy at times and yes i need to have a balanced diet as i am exclusively breast feeding.

and yes i need to be more active about my insomnia ......i am such a lazy ass

Re: Second or more time parents

I’m currently eating as much meat as i can, before i cant … last time round i did not touch meat from 1.5- 7th month of pregnancy.

my first is a very difficult, clingy baby… but i’m forcing myself to not think about how hard it’ll be with two, iA i’ll handle it when the time comes.

my husband has already planned to take time off work so that he can help out in adjusting to two babies.

i’m seriously thinking about giving the second one a bottle at night and not breastfeed her to sleep, this has made my life really hard with the first. But i cant help but feel guilty about giving it something thats second best :bummer:

Re: Second or more time parents

i didnt really think bout what i would do diffrently when i was pregnant the 2nd time around..

but when the baby came.. here is what i just automatically did

didnt get scared by the baby's cry. infact.. if i were in the middle of tending to midget or cleaning up.. i would finish the chore and then tend to her. a lil bit of crying never hurt anyone.
with midget i would get anxiety attacks if i heard him cry.. it left me depressed!

not to let night time feeds leave me sweating buckets out of fear of the unknown. if she got up int he middle of the night. i would remain calm. with midget i remember it being horrific.. because i didnt knwo why he was crying (if the feeding wasnt stopping the cry)..2nd time around i would check for hot or cold, nasal passage, and if it was nothing.. then i just put her next to me and tried to calm her down.

let her be the boss... the first time around i couldnt accept the baby was playing boss.. it left me angry and confused and so so short of temper with myself and teh baby.. second time around... it was upto her how much she drank (no more checking to see if she was getting her full dose of milk needs).. how much she slept.. etc etc. it made me realx so so much!

no staring at clock and keeping note of time of feed time of poo time of everything and anything! again.. MUCH more relaxed cuz of that.

taking time out of household duties to spend time with baby. with midget.. i couldnt let housework stay untouched.. so midget would ome second and even then i would get angry cuz he was keeping me from the house chores. (i know.. insane).. but i love keeping my house orderly. 2nd time around.. i let it go to hell. baby comes first. this way i also spend lots of time with midget.

so all in all.. its been a much much calmer time and im a much happier mom! somehow .. i manage to get more down housework wise than i did when i just had midget.. its so so odd!

it also makes a HUGE DIFF what kinda baby you have.. genie is a very very calm and collected baby .. more than happy to be by herself.. midget was a high maintainence baby with reflux issues and very very utterly SO SO clingy!

mindset of a mom is determined by what kinda baby she has.

kher.. as for me.. the first pregnancy was much better than teh 2nd .. i ate so awesomely trhe first time around. 2nd time.. pathetic.

oh and you also get SO utterly relaxed in other things.. baby crying. baby falling.. baby bottles not getting sterilized religiously .. ahha.. its like all the fringes you get rid off as the number of times you havea baby increases :D

Re: Second or more time parents

Those are awesome tips!!! I sm hoping to vf that way this time around Inshallah. Munchkin was an awesome baby but I stressed about everything (during the first 3 months) after that it was pretty cruise sailing

Re: Second or more time parents

i made a siminalr plan before the birth of my second, and stuck to NOTHING. apart from givijg my eldest lots of hugs and kisses. however i noticed that i was giving her tooo many kisses and hugs that i almost forgot i had another baby....felt guilt ridden alot in the early days as i was so used to having my eldest all the time, all my attention that when i pickd up the 2nd one, my eldest had tears in her eyes and looked ghum-sum and sad...she nwas only 16 months herself, uffffff. anyway i learnt quicklt to give both same time.
now mashallah shes 20 months and my secondborn is 4monthsold and the eldest one takes care of her.

Re: Second or more time parents

What's the shaping belt, Sadzzz? I'm not married/don't have kids. But my mom became pregnant with my brother when I was 3 months old. It's a scary thought...I don't know how she managed. Anyhow..after having two kids, she had a slim figure. Remember her mentioning wearing a belt...but never asked her what it did? I'm guessing it helps slim you down? Does it actually work?