The future remains bright for Team India
By our semi-Indian correspondent
Karachi: To the simple folk of this world, the visiting Indian team may have been beaten to pulp by their Pakistani counterparts but to the semi blind experts, as the TSN has learnt today, the story is far from over. Speaking on conditions of absolute and utter anonymity, someone very important in the Indian cricket setup has revealed that brave new plans are afoot to create a new Indian team of super heroes.
The unidentified source has described the move as daring and ruthless as the Indian game plan to dismiss Kamran Akmal for a about a hundred in the 1st innings of the Karachi test. According to the plan, the BCCI has ordered a talent hunt for India’s next pace sensation by ordering all cricketers above the age of 75 to report to the MRF academy with immediate effect.
As bus loads of hopefuls arrived in wheel-chairs or were carried into the academy by their great grand children, the spokesman explained the top secret training program in more detail, According to this undisclosed source, given the extra ordinary success of Shoaib to unsettle Indian batsman by sheer pace - the Indian board had decided to pursue a similar but slightly different strategy. The idea behind this scheme was to unleash these octogenarian cricketers to improve the current pace battery of Indian bowlers.
As an example, of such a strategic thinking, the special unknown source ( who happens to be the first cousin of the paan walla married to the gatekeepr at Wankhede stadium) said that Bishen Singh Bedi has been chosen to partner none other than the current great fast bowler - Anil Kumble. According to draft game plans, after the opening salvo by this new ball duo, the opposing teams batsman would be overcome with so much fatigue brought on by uncontrollable hysteria, that they will not be in any shape or form to face up to to the famed Indian spin trio led by Irfan Pathan, Zaheer Khan and Ashish Nehra!
As the world of cricket shook with the repercussions of such a strategy, cables of good wishes started to arrive at the BCCI headquarters tonight. In one of these messages, the famed Pakistani cricket thing, Aamir Sohail praised the Indian management for such forward thinking - he said “I would like to congratulate the Indian authorities for tackling the issue of effective bowling attacks and balanced team selection head-on, by looking at the past as opposed to the future. I will now carry out a hunger strike at the footsteps of the Gaddafi stadiium until Bob Woolmer agrees to bring back Mohammad Khalil and I am allowed free passes to the VIP Section which strangely enough, have been withdrawn due to my recent frank statements”.
Another prominent Indian person of some minor cricketing intelligence , Arun Laal also greeted this decision and stated that he was sure that Pakistan were scared stiff of this bold Indian move and in typical arrogance continue with their scheme of using talented young players. He further added that thanks to this tremendous move, he could now see a day where India could remain miles ahead of Zimbabwe and Bangladesh in the ICC rankings.
And finally…
In related news, The Mayo hospital for the treatment of mentally unstable people has announced that yet another celebrity patient had checked in for therapy. Pir NangaJan, head of exorcisms and other bladder related issues at the hospital said that a unnamed batsman from the Indian country of India had admitted himself after recurrence of nightmares. In these dreams, a demon wearing Pakistani cricket uniform would be seen hurtling towards our innocent victim and repeatedly throwing a red object (approx size of a cricket ball) aimed at his head. Pir NangaJan described the condition of the patient as agitated and although the patient had described a dream which could well be a figment of his fertile imagination - the experts were at at a total loss to explain the largish dent on his helmet ! 
good one once again GA :k: