Sardar Jee's Special

Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardar Jee were sent to the outer space by NASA for a space mission.
The ground control issues commands.
“Rubi!”
“Woof!”
“Press the red button.”
“Woof! Woof!”
“Moti!”
“Woof!”
“Press the white button.”
“Woof! Woof!”
“Sardarji!”
“Woof.”
“Stop barking, feed the dogs and don’t touch anything.”

Surjit Singh saw that his friend Pambeer Singh was very depressed.
“What happened?” asked Surjit.
“Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday.” replied Pambeer.
“How come ?”
“Well, yesterday, the one-day match between Pakistan and India was being shown live on TV. I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet.”
“But that’s only Rs. 500, where did the rest go?” asked Surjit.
“Yaar, I bet on the highlights too!”

Sardarji calls British Airways.
“How long does it take to fly to London?”
“Just a sec,” says the rep.
“Thank you.” says the Sardarji and hangs up.

Sardarji is in Faisalabad. He is walking on the Ghanta Ghar Chowk which has a Clock Tower when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower. Sardarji says “Yes”. “Give me a thousand rupees and I’ll go get a ladder.” The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Sardarji figured he was taken. On the next day the Sardarji is again walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock.“Give me a thousand rupees and I’ll go get a ladder.” The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says “I am not a fool. This time, you wait and I’ll go get a ladder.”

Gurbachan Singh finished his English exam and came out. His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied “Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought … and at last I wrote THUNK !!!”


A Rana-Jee Production

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absolutely hilarious …

MS

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ok I got a few, although both originally in Punjabi, I’ll use english to make it shorter.
I got this one which I heard from a Gurdaas Maan stage show, he said the joke himself.

ok, a muslim, christian and sikh are sentenced to death by a Gillotine (sp?)
you know the kind that drops a blade from high up and chops the head off. So the Muslim guy goes, the blade drops and stops just before hitting his neck. The police are shocked and say that God must have saved him, who are we to give the death penalty. They let the muslim guy go, the same happens to the Christian guy. Now the sardar comes up and is about to go, but he stops and tells the police, ‘Fix your blade first!’

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It seems to me that sardars degrade themselves!
ok, here is another one

Ok it is day of judgment. A muslim, Christian and Sikh are to go face God. God questions the muslim guy, he has done both bad and good so he forgives the muslim guy and sends him to heaven. Then the christian comes, he has done bad and good but he wasnt muslim and he did shirk so he sends him to hell.
Now the sardar comes up, he is confused and has no idea where he is, he has his turban and dagger and all.

God : ‘Who are you?’
Sardar : ‘Who are you???’
God: ‘I am your creator, what did you do for me in your life?’
Sardar : ‘What did you do for me??’
God: ‘I provided you with life, and sustenance, and I gave you death also’
I created all humans, I created all insaan

Sardar : (has a confused look on his face) and says ‘MAI KOI INSAAN LAGNA WAAN?’

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[This message has been edited by STRONGMAN (edited June 01, 2000).]

Last one is nice..