A young kid is doing his/her usual sharataiN, you know jumping from a high place or being rowdy with his siblings or friends and one of his parents tell him to stop it before someone gets hurt. He doesn’t and someone does get hurt. Not ‘poke out the eye, blind for life’ hurt but just a little bump or a small bruise.
Now, what is the parent to do? Should he or she say “I told you so” or just ignore the fact that he warned them and let the kid learn his own lesson. In other words, how much good or bad effect does rubbing in your opinion has on children when you are proven right?
This happens when children get older but in a different way. For example kids choosing their own friends who might be of bad influence and get them in trouble, choice of college, major, profession or even spouse etc.
I'd totally rub it in and remind the kid in future too. If the kid is confident enough to think he/she knows better than me then that confidence needs to be broken as it is overconfidence.
It only works on younger kids. Older kids will resent you being right.
ahmadjee it doesn't register at all with kids.. go ahead and rub it in as much as you want.. it just wouldn't stick.. they are too busy conjuring up their next *shararat * than to dwell on all the blah blah blah daa dee daa they hear coming out of you..
It works on occasion. I don't make a big deal of the accident, and point out that "well, I told you not to slide headfirst down the stairs - this is what happens."
I have seen some parents hit the table or chair and say "bad table" or something when the kid falls into it - why?
I am totally against of rubbin into kid's face. If you wana remind them .. remind them in a way so they can learn their lesson b/c sometimes sensitive kids would take to their heart . .
Mad_S, young children don't do things they shouldn't be doing out of confidence, they do it out of impulse and temptation that they can't seem to control.
Now, what is the parent to do? Should he or she say "I told you so" or just ignore the fact that he warned them and let the kid learn his own lesson. In other words, how much good or bad effect does rubbing in your opinion has on children when you are proven right?
Depends on age of child as well as how good he understands what you say as PA said.
I never rub it in. Once I had told them something and they still do and get hurt, I just tend to their immediate needs and then that is it. Most of the time, they realise and they are careful next time. Kids need to learn to make desicions on their own.
I, recently, got a comment from my colleagues kid that I am not mean enough with my kids as her father is. It was funny.
I agree with those who say that it doesn't register with younger kids but as kids grow older and their problems become complex, it is important to understand when to give advice and when to hold back.
None the less, when the wound is fresh, it is best to be take care of it first before starting to lecture.