Inspired by some off-topic discussions in the other thread, what have you done or what do you think you would do to best handle getting the right guest count for your wedding events?
When you answer, also note in what part of the world the wedding events and most guests are located.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
Hey! We did RSVP cards, per-stamped last year and again this year. Alh we received 99% back and well before the deadline last year, so far half back this year. I did have to call about 6 folks last year.
We asked for RSVP via email for Mayoon and Mehendi and it was 50/50.
Guests from all around globe, mainly west coast, USA.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
We handed out RSVP's in self-addressed, stamped envelopes for my wedding too. We received all back except for one. However, we had a small wedding and over half our guests were non-desi so they were more used to the receiving, and sending back, of RSVPs.
We sent out RSVPs for my brother's wedding too which was almost entirely desi and if I remember correctly, received most of them back but my mom had to call some stragglers. The wedding was in Toronto and I think desi people here are slowly getting used to the concept.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
wow you guys have good communities. I'm in the US and my friend got married, sent out cards with RSVP. NO ONE responded back and at the mehndi/shaadi there were people that showed up that weren't invited. The bride and grooms bffls had to eat at the shaadi standing up because the hall was at capacity since people brought their entire families and extended families. At the mehndi, it was all girls, but women randomly brought their male family members so we had to eat standing up there too.
UGH SO annoying
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
They also serve
who stand and eat
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
They also serve who stand and eat
??? huh?
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
??? huh?
Someone earlier mentioned having to stand and eat. The last two lines of a poem I learnt in school came to mind
They also serve
Who (only) stand and wait.
I replaced wait with eat
The poet was John Milton - who became blind (googled to find this today). He States we all contribute our own way - even those who only stand and wait - or in this case stand and eat.
For some reason this line has stuck with me through the decades - though I have long since forgotten the rest.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
Someone earlier mentioned having to stand and eat. The last two lines of a poem I learnt in school came to mind
They also serve Who (only) stand and wait.
I replaced wait with eat
The poet was John Milton - who became blind (googled to find this today). He States we all contribute our own way - even those who only stand and wait - or in this case stand and eat.
For some reason this line has stuck with me through the decades - though I have long since forgotten the rest.
ohhhh okay. Yeah that was me! :P
It wouldn't have been too big of a deal but I think that all the bride's friends (inc myself) feel incredibly used and abused throughout the whole shaadi process so it was kind of another blow.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
We didn't do envelopes....we created a joint email address for specifically RSVP purposes and made a note on the invite to please RSVP by this date at the email addr.
We did struggle with getting RSVPs in. Most of the non-desi community was fine, but surprisingly even some non-desis were difficult with RSVPs. My colleagues didn't do it - I asked them and they were like oh you know we're gonna be there. So one of them just texted me confirmation for all of them coming.
Then there were the brown people - but most brown people were good. His and my parents had told all the brown guests when giving the invites that dinner is sit down and there's a seating plan, so please make sure you RSVP. The parents emphasized on sit down dinner and seating plan with the desis because that was the only way they'd take RSVPs seriously lol. In the end, my mom did have to call a few people to confirm.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
We didn't do envelopes....we created a joint email address for specifically RSVP purposes and made a note on the invite to please RSVP by this date at the email addr.
We did struggle with getting RSVPs in. Most of the non-desi community was fine, but surprisingly even some non-desis were difficult with RSVPs. My colleagues didn't do it - I asked them and they were like oh you know we're gonna be there. So one of them just texted me confirmation for all of them coming.
Then there were the brown people - but most brown people were good. His and my parents had told all the brown guests when giving the invites that dinner is sit down and there's a seating plan, so please make sure you RSVP. The parents emphasized on sit down dinner and seating plan with the desis because that was the only way they'd take RSVPs seriously lol. In the end, my mom did have to call a few people to confirm.
OT - how did your sit down dinner go? Did you serve desi food? Me and the bf have pretty much said that our reception will be a sit down dinner... our parents don't think it'll work.
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
usually RSVP...but desis think RSVP is there just to include names of close relatives on the card...if you do NOT add their name or it's below someone Else's name, they mind it and get naaraaz :)
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
OT - how did your sit down dinner go? Did you serve desi food? Me and the bf have pretty much said that our reception will be a sit down dinner... our parents don't think it'll work.
It worked out wonderfully for us! My fiance insisted on sit down while me and our parents weren't so sure because we had around 400 guests. But I'm glad we went ahead with it. There were no long lineups or crowd. Yeah it was desi food. But i think what really matters is the venue you guys choose. I'm not sure how a completely brown banquet will do sit down dinners. Our venue isn't just used for weddings, but also for corporate meetings and seminars. So the service is top notch and they're accustomed to the sit down style. Also, the caterers we went with are affiliated with the venue (caterers were desi though) and they've together done weddings sit down. So it worked out great and everyone got their food without waiting long and the servers were even quick with re-filling everything. So if you wanna go for sit down, my suggestion would be to do good research for your venue and talk to them about this and how they'll handle it and how many servers per table etc. Do you live in Toronto?
Re: RSVPs and the desi community
It worked out wonderfully for us! My fiance insisted on sit down while me and our parents weren't so sure because we had around 400 guests. But I'm glad we went ahead with it. There were no long lineups or crowd. Yeah it was desi food. But i think what really matters is the venue you guys choose. I'm not sure how a completely brown banquet will do sit down dinners. Our venue isn't just used for weddings, but also for corporate meetings and seminars. So the service is top notch and they're accustomed to the sit down style. Also, the caterers we went with are affiliated with the venue (caterers were desi though) and they've together done weddings sit down. So it worked out great and everyone got their food without waiting long and the servers were even quick with re-filling everything. So if you wanna go for sit down, my suggestion would be to do good research for your venue and talk to them about this and how they'll handle it and how many servers per table etc. Do you live in Toronto?
Thanks so much! Yeah I'm in Toronto... Can you PM me the venue or post it here? Thanks again!