Rishta Demands

[ehl-e-chamman]

Re: Rishta Demands

@redvelvet

^Ehl,

I don’t think we can assume or deduce that the OP is jahaiz-hungry when he never mentioned jahaiz in his post. My guess is that he’s not against the concept of haq mehr, but rather that some girls may be asking for an exorbitant haq mehr. Even though certain things are left up to us…there’s a reasonable and unreasonable way to approach it.

Speaking generally about jahaiz, I think the haq mehr is beautiful in that it sends people the message that a bride or a wife should not be viewed as a burden or “another mouth” to feed by the potential groom and his family…as such thinking is what contributed toward the self-entitlement attitude which led to demanding of jahaiz both prior to the marriage and after it. Haq mehr …I think…also reinforces that a daughter is not to be seen as a burden. But unfortunately…despite having this protective measure in our religion…some Muslims today still expect/demand a dowry.

RV … i take serious issue with the tone and words used by the OP in describing the parents intentions and my response was and choice of words was/is to indicate my displeasure of his unpalatable thought process.
his complaint/view of the issue is unbalanced, unkind and uncalled for. Yes, some women/their families can/do demand exorbitant amounts … but in this particular case OP did notdefine “a huge amount” … for all we know … perhaps its huge to OP and perfectly reasonable from perspective of parents? Regardless … does it warrant OP to accuse parents of “selling” a daughter … I wonder if he is aware of the implication of this words and the massive massive insult he has hurled at parents in general.