Are awful. They value money and beauty, and that’s what they use to sell to the opposing parties. Almost like little enticing imps.
I think part of why there are such horrible marriages around, and divorces, is because these women are instrumental in setting up marriages on the wrong foundation.
Re: Rishta Aunties
I hate to break it to u but they won't be able to "sell" u to the interested parties if they describe ur check list and fear/aversions that u describe on GS :). You have to look good on paper before they decide to meet u in person, as I assume u'd want the guy to look good on paper before u move further. So ur looking at his education/earning potential/family dynamics and they're looking at ur education/shakal soorath/roti making skills etc. U can't expect rishta aunties to look for abstract compatibility since even immediate families and siblings go wrong on that (they too just take care of a basic check list and leave compatibility/companionship/affection/love to chance).
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Pcg, all they can do is suggest potentials. As annoying as rishta auntis can be sometimes, they don't seal any deals. It's up to the respective families to meet and to do an investigation and to decide.
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If those are the only criterion, sasha, then those aunties are completely useless. You're supposed to find a friend and a life partner, not a job resume. Some of the best people to be married to and that one could be compatible with don't necessarily fit the idealized requirements these aunties have.
Most of the girls I know in our community who are fabulous people don't cook rotian. In fact, even the trashy girls don't cook rotian, I really don't know who doesn't just used frozen naans or rotian.
Most of the girls I know in our community who are fab do not look like aishwarya rai. They have their own unique beauty, some look like super models, but most need to do their hair and make-up like anyone else to look good.
So anyone can have a job-wallet-good job potential, but out of those guys, only a few will be a good match based on personality and values. Same vice versa, lots of pretty girls at any one dawat, make-up does wonders for all. But who is a good fit for a particular guy?
Rishta aunties are not asking the right questions.
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Pcg ur putting too much of a burden on the rishta aunties. They can only suggest ppl knowing basic requirements. They can't know if ur an introvert or bubbly and what kind of guy u r looking for. Imagine telling the mil or sil k wo Bari chulbuli is larki hae but she likes the strong silent type. Mil bolain haw haye maeray heeray Jaesay betay Ko daba k rakhna chahti hae, asi Tay kadi nai karna aeho Ji kuri nal veya. Good Personality rishta recommendations can only work out if a good friend of Urs suggests a guy that she personally knows or her hubby or brother personally knows. As u know, we don't open up our real personalities to aunties and uncles and they never know what we r really like. So all those times that our parents said Unki beti kitni achi hae boht tahammal mizaaj lagti hae, and only u know that she sneaks out with friends or ***** slapped someone at school, that's what I'm talking about. Better for aunties uncles to just see resume's and u to talk to guy directly to get to know each other. Because the rishta aunty can never know u personally or know the guy, it's impossible. She would have to get a two hour consultation with all her rishta potentials on file to know their hopes and dreams and k "aap apnay life partner Mae kya dekhna pasand karaingay". It's not practical or feasible.
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And the roti thing was just me trying to be funny or get u riled up :) But do be prepared for when the guy asks if u know how to cook.
Btw I had a friend who cooked perfect rotis and knew nothing else.
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There is more to the world than a roti.
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Yup... I have to admit I dont know how to make rotis, only attempted like once or twice with my mom. 6 years down the line my husband still randomly reminds me " Aapnay rotiyaan banani nahi seekheen". My saving grace is that mil is an amazing cook but doesn't make rotis (although she's good at it). If she did then I might have had to learn. (I think the reason I'm not attempting to learn is that he'll want me to make it like really often and I don't enjoy cooking so much). On a side note my husband believes so and I think statistically I agree with it, punjabis are more into ghar ki roti and is considered bigger deal agar "kuri nu roti nai banani aandi". So safe way to know if future husband will not make roti an issue is if his mom makes it at home or not, has he grown up with it or not.
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I'm not punjabi. We don't obsess over rotis, since that's not our staple.
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I wasn't talking about u being a punjabi or not I was talking about the potential rishta beig a punjabi. Anyway there has been so much roti talk that my light humor has turned into a long winding something. Cheers!
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I'm not punjabi. We don't obsess over rotis, since that's not our staple.
That's an odd comment. Bread (in its various forms) and rice are dietary staples across the globe.
Nobody's gonna buy that, PCG. Just say you don't believe in roti; it's easier.
Okay...what it the Memoni staple then? I am curious now.
Re: Rishta Aunties
Are awful. They value money and beauty, and that's what they use to sell to the opposing parties. Almost like little enticing imps.
I think part of why there are such horrible marriages around, and divorces, is because these women are instrumental in setting up marriages on the wrong foundation.
money and beauty are the main things one looks at in arranged rishtas as you cannot tell someones personality unless you spend alot of time with them. when you're in love with someone, you're willing to look past those things but not when it's something arranged. most people who ask rishta aunties to look for a match for their children ask for these same things; money, looks, and 'good' family. once those basic criteria are met, then you proceed with getting to know the guy/girl.
if one cannot find a a good rishta themselves, what makes them think a rishta aunty can find one? they don't have magical powers. they go by what the people demand from them.
best way to find a spouse in my opinion is to find one yourself and not rely on anyone else.
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If services provided by a group of 'professionals' are awful, they'd die out eventually given lack of demand for awful services.
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That's an odd comment. Bread (in its various forms) and rice are dietary staples across the globe. Nobody's gonna buy that, PCG. Just say you don't believe in roti; it's easier.
Okay...what it the Memoni staple then? I am curious now.
Rice. Not everyone is punjabi, sorry.
Re: Rishta Aunties
I think part of why there are such horrible marriages around, and divorces, is because these women are instrumental in setting up marriages on the wrong foundation.
Lolz. now you have found them to blame for messy marriages.
Those two people living in marriage are emotionless humanoid robots who can't put in any effort to save their marriage.
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Rishta aunties are fun :D
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Re: Rishta Aunties
Are awful. They value money and beauty, and that's what they use to sell to the opposing parties. Almost like little enticing imps.
I think part of why there are such horrible marriages around, and divorces, is because these women are instrumental in setting up marriages on the wrong foundation.
Or maybe the parties buying from them value those things and they'll let the said parties know when they come across what they think they're looking for.
Re: Rishta Aunties
What no one is standing up for a rishta aunty here ????? Let me be the first ... I think they are super awesome and are human version of eharmony . People who don't like them , they need to learn technology .
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Rishta Aunties are like headhunter/recruiters. They can only look and try to match similar qualifications/characteristics. Ofcourse everyone is going to want the best for their son, even if he is a loser. No point in getting angry over it. Don't hate the player hate the game. A 28+ liberal feminist who doesnt know how to make roties is not going to be on any guy's wish list. Usually girls like who do find someone, is because they were able to make the guy fall inlove with them which is another goal on its own. I completely agree with alot of your ideas but I got to tell you, no matter how naturally beatiful or honest you are, a girl who is fake and gives what the other people are looking for with her looks/personality/behavior is going to have better rishta prospects.
Its like going on a job interview. who is management going to prefer, the young straight out of school kid with no personal responsiblitites and can work till midnight and doesnt know anybetter, or the single mother who will need random days off. The only way the single mother is going to win is if she has soemthing extra to offer.
you need to watch MULAN :)