Can someone tell me what are those “right reasons” for getting married & how those “right reasons” can make your married life wonderful ?
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o very easy
we are not animals -
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I believe what Paheli meant was that "Haai sab ki shaadiyan ho gayi hain...sirf main akeli reh gai hoon"........"Oh no, I don't have a guy in my life, I'm so incomplete"....are not the best reasons to get married.
Think about people who are divorced...or whose spouses are no longer alive. Kya woh laug mar gaye hain? Has life stopped moving for them? No. The problem is that centering your self-worth....your identity....your whole life on another person is not only gonna end up hurting you at some point.....it will turn others off.
I'm not trying attack you or put you down. I have no such intentions. But your posts are exuding a needy vibe....even if you DON'T feel that way. I could be completely wrong and maybe you're just asking general questions...but I wouldn't be surprised if some readers feel the same way. If that's the vibe you're sending online....then it may also be picked up on in your real-life interactions with others...especially the opposite gender. We're not always aware of how we come across to others. And I think that all of us (at various points) have appeared needy/clingy and most times it backfires.
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Much like it.
Shukriya. :-)
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u r interested in hearing religious or non-religious reasons? :)
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no you cant think about something equally worst just because it makes you feel good rv
I believe what Paheli meant was that "Haai sab ki shaadiyan ho gayi hain...sirf main akeli reh gai hoon"........"Oh no, I don't have a guy in my life, I'm so incomplete"....are not the best reasons to get married.
Think about people who are divorced...or whose spouses are no longer alive. Kya woh laug mar gaye hain? Has life stopped moving for them? No. The problem is that centering your self-worth....your identity....your whole life on another person is not only gonna end up hurting you at some point.....it will turn others off.
I'm not trying attack you or put you down. I have no such intentions. But your posts are exuding a needy vibe....even if you DON'T feel that way. I could be completely wrong and maybe you're just asking general questions...but I wouldn't be surprised if some readers feel the same way. If that's the vibe you're sending online....then it may also be picked up on in your real-life interactions with others...especially the opposite gender. We're not always aware of how we come across to others. And I think that all of us (at various points) have appeared needy/clingy and most times it backfires.
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^You and your gay posts Miss Shaary. 
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The right reason? Your ammi wants you to get married so you can give her a grandson.
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^Oh what...so a granddaughter is not good enough now? Huh? Huh? :p
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no matter how strong you are, you will fall one day because humans are weak & emotional beings if you are alone. You feel depressed sometimes because you think you are way behind than others. The mistake i did is that i posted on GS hoping that i will feel better & not all alone but response from you & paheli was quite rude. Divorced ppl you are talking about also feel down & alone at certain stage as i m feeling but your response to that person will also be same. Well.....i m needy.... i m desperate...... i m in rush etc etc .......:)
I believe what Paheli meant was that "Haai sab ki shaadiyan ho gayi hain...sirf main akeli reh gai hoon"........"Oh no, I don't have a guy in my life, I'm so incomplete"....**are not the best reasons to get married.
** Think about people who are divorced...or whose spouses are no longer alive. Kya woh laug mar gaye hain? Has life stopped moving for them? No. The problem is that centering your self-worth....your identity....your whole life on another person is not only gonna end up hurting you at some point.....it will turn others off.
I'm not trying attack you or put you down. I have no such intentions. But your posts are exuding a needy vibe....even if you DON'T feel that way. I could be completely wrong and maybe you're just asking general questions...but I wouldn't be surprised if some readers feel the same way. If that's the vibe you're sending online....then it may also be picked up on in your real-life interactions with others...especially the opposite gender. We're not always aware of how we come across to others. And I think that all of us (at various points) have appeared needy/clingy and most times it backfires.
what are the best reasons then?? plzzz elaborate......
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& yeah marrying someone from back home to import him does come under the right reasons category too? 
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How about a son and a daughter. Even better if they’re twins. Just sayin. 
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^Oh what...so a granddaughter is not good enough now? Huh? Huh? :p
That's not the reason your mother wants you to get married. (your mother doesn't necessarily means your mom...=/ )
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I can trump that one…i gave birth to twin BOYS…i fulfilled my womenly duties on this earth 
and I make a damn good sammich too…
OP, you need to a sledgehammer to break up that massive chip on your shoulder…Paheli & RV were not attacking you, just trying to give you friendly advice that unless you are happy/secure/satisfied within yourself, no amount of companionship can fullfill you…
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right reason?
because you want to.
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right reason?
because you want to.
THIS....
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^ but then ppl will start calling you desperate, needy etc etc
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right reason?
because you want to.
In our society, that never happens. Girls get married because their expiry date is fast approaching. Boys get married because, like I said, mothers want a grandson.
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forget what people say....unsay kya layna dayna....are they paying your bills? why do feel the need to owe anyone an explanation. when you meet someone who are emotionally & physically attracted to, marry him..end of story! until then..savor the solitude, once the hubby and kids come, it's all down hill from there..dirty dishes, dirty clothes, dirty diapers and zero bank balance (JUST KIDDING!!!!)
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I believe what Paheli meant was that "Haai sab ki shaadiyan ho gayi hain...sirf main akeli reh gai hoon*"........"Oh no, I don't have a guy in my life, I'm so incomplete"....are not the best reasons to get married.*
Yep....I agree with all that.
I'll use myself as an example. I don't NEED to get married. I WANT to get married. I blessed with a well-paying career, great family, and wonderful friends. I don't need a "husband" to be happy or feel fulfilled. Of course I would love to have children someday. But I could also adopt on my own and give a needy child a the experience of having a loving mother (versus growing up in a orphanage) if I wanted to. My friends and family give me plenty of company. I met my fiance in a random situation. I wasn't out looking for a man. I believe with hard work and some blessing from God.....I'll have a wonderful life. If I have a husband to share my life with....that'll be great and ideal. But if for some reason....if I don't have one (either my engagement breaks off, I get divorced or become a widow)....that doesn't mean my life is over. At the end of the day....if I'm not happy with who I am....then I have no right to expect someone else to be happy with me.
People marry for many reasons. Some marry because they NEED a greencard. Some marry because they NEED money/financial stability. Other marry because the woman got pregnant (NEED to save izzat). And yes...some marry because they NEED someone else to feel the void of loneliness. In my humble opinion and due to my experience with all the divorces I deal with....anytime the "NEED" to get marry outweighs the "WANT" of marriage....it effects the choosing of a partner in a negative way.
I 2nd redvelvet in saying that I also have no intention in attacking you or judging you. Your other thread...the initial post where you talked about how lonely you are and how lucky married people are, and how you need someone 24/7......that made you come across as a VERY needy/clingy person who needs constant babysitting (for lack of a better word). I actually know women in real-life who have this personality and their marriages are miserable. I have several clients who initiated divorce b/c they simply felt like a babysitter instead of a husbnad b/c their wives were so needy/clingy in that marriage, and needed constant attention. The men simply got tired of it.
This is no different than those teenage girls who come from broken/unhappy homes and choose to get pregnant b/c they think a baby will love them and make them happy. They don't realize all the other responsibilities and focus on this dream-like version of motherhood. Your initial post gave me the impression that you think marriage is all full of happiness and that your loneliess will over once you marry. I just want to make sure you realize that marriage is hard work and is not a solution to you feeling lonely.
Since I don't know anyone on this site in real-life....all my posts are based strictly on what's written here. I also have 0 ability to read people's minds. I try my best not to assume things. And just going by the words you wrote on that other thread....you came across as a VERY needy/clingly person. And I sincerely hope this is not the vibe you give in real-life to men you meet.
** Also on a side note....I will repeat like a broken record....there are NO guarantees in life. NOTHING....and I will repeat again....NOTHING will guarantee that your married life will be wonderful. But you can take steps to reduce the risk that the marriage will go sour. Choosing a spouse for the "right reasons" lessens the risk of you being miserable. But it still will not be wonderful unless both you and your spouse are willing to work hard to make it wonderful.