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Piranha 3D](http://www.moviefone.com/movie/piranha-3d/51965/main) is a horror movie bar mitzvah. It turns boys into men, cleaving their life into two distinct periods: Before Piranha 3D, a time we shall refer to as The Darkness, and after Piranha 3D, also known as The Awakening. Now that I have thankfully awoken in its glorious elysian fields of excessive gore and outrageous nudity, I never want to return to horror films that require fewer than 800,000 gallons of fake blood spilling forth from 500 bikini-clad extras. Anything less is an insult and, frankly, a malicious waste of my time.
Now, of course that’s all hyperbole, but that’s also the point. Alexandre Aja’s Piranha 3D is a movie that thrives on constantly pushing things over the top. The gore, the nudity, the language, the gags, the characters-- it’s all always on the rise. Just when you think things could not possibly get more ridiculous, that the film has peaked, Aja and screenwriters Pete Goldfinger and Josh Stolberg manage to ram another syringe of adrenaline into its heart, completely bypassing any exhaustion it, and by extension the audience, may have been feeling. This is the kind of movie that refuses to stop indulging in B-movie cliches that other recent films of its ilk clearly feel guilty about having fun with.Filed under: Horror, Theatrical Reviews