all of us know people in pakistan, indian, china, and other third world countries are discriminant against having girls. but recently i have noticed a trend in more educated, people that they are wishing to have a girl more than a boy. and i personally feel like it’s more like a trend and attempt to look cool than anything else. One of my friend who just had a baby few months ago told me that she was so disappointed when she find out that she was having a boy, because she always wanted a girl to play with and dress up etc. i hear this a lot from people i know, and also on tv, people are saying that girls are better than boys, they are more loving blah blah blah. I don’t get it. why can’t they put both gender equally? why does people put boys down when they are telling others that they want to have a girl? it’s just a reverse discrimination which i think just as bad as original.
i think if you raise a child correctly both girls, and boys can be really loving, and responsible. if you have a good taste in dressing up ur child, u can dress ur your boy just as cute/handsome as people say they want to dress up girls.
what’s ur take on it?
Re: reverse gender discrimination
… looks like an ‘incorrect’ post 
Re: reverse gender discrimination
I think people are ungrateful to God. Larki hai to larka chaheay, Larka hai to larki chaheay. Its a joke for everyone now. We are forgetting a child is Allah's blessing, doesn't matter a girl or a boy. We should thank Allah for giving us a healthy baby.
Re: reverse gender discrimination
i think that the actual parents to be don't really care what they have as long as the baby is healthy but it's the people around us who we want to please so although the parents don't care if it's a boy or girl they might still hope for example for a boy just to please MIL etc...
When i was pregnant my FIL said to me 'i hope it's a boy for my son's sake' his son (my husband) didn't care at all whether it was a boy or girl. In the end we had a girl.....and i'm not saying this becasue she is my daughter but seriously she is a stunner and ma'shallah very bright...my husband can't live, breathe without her.
When she was born FIL was dissappointed and didn't come to see her for 3 weeks! Now she is 14 months my FIL often tells me that she is very very beautiful and so intelligent....my FIL doesn't have a daughter (only 3 boys) and i think he realises that he has missed out on an angel from heaven.
Both Boys and girls are a blessing rasie them well and they both will love and respect you. I just want my next baby to be healthy....whether you have a boy or girl it's news to people for like 5 minutes and then people move on to the next bit of gossip....so don't care what people think or say. Just thank Allah that you and baby are well.
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I always wanted a girl first. But once I got pregnant for some reason I was sure it was a boy and got attached to the idea. I almost didn't believe the doctors when they said it was a girl. Pleasantly surprised. :)
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i dont know… i always wanted a girl only cuz i could dress them up and they were so cute… i had a boy. i kept asking the midwife to check again. its not heart breaking or its not like i was being unappreciative of what god was giving me knowing what was best for us as a couple… but hey… the heart wants what the heart wants. needless to say… i love my midget a whole lot and have put his curly hair to good use. see..we make do
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I think it is normal for parents to wish for something but whatever Allah has in store for them is always appreciated. I think "other" people have more problems than the parents themselves!
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Yes it's the other people demanding you have a certain gender which is almost always a BOY!
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i think it's ok to wish for something. for example, i feel like i enjoy with baby boys a lot more than baby girls. i like their rough play, and maar dhaar, uchal koodh. i my self isn't a very girly person so i feel like i will be a terrible mom of a girl who wants to play with barbie doll not cars and trucks. i don't like princess movies (tangle is an exception) i enjoy toy story kind of movies. But regardless of all those reasons, having a child is a lot more than dressing up the kid and playing with him/her.
i was watching a morning show where faisal qureshi was a host, and he was talking with his callers about daughters being better than sons. i understand that he was talking about this to change the mentality of people in pakistan who feel like having a boy is an honorable thing, but that could be done without putting sons down so much, and putting daughters above sons.
i think the message those show/people should be giving out is about equality not, that one gender is better than other.
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I think you should just be happy regardless of what gender it is it's actually sad people voice such concerns and often have some sort of hatred towards having a boy or girl.
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When I was pregnant, I wished to have a girl because I have a neice and I have taken care of her and know so much about girls so the idea of having a boy seemed a little uncomfortable for me and I wasn’t sure if I could ever relate to him. Guess what? We had a baby boy! And WE BOTH LOVE HIM! He’s so cute and I love all his harkaten. He’s just a perfect baby, mashAllah. Would I still be happy if I had a girl? I’m pretty sure yes. In the end it doesn’t matter if you get a girl or boy, you’ll learn to love what you have! Sometimes what you want isn’t always what you get but what you want isn’t always what’s ‘better’ either and forget about other people!!
I think I went off topic…I agree with you, these days people are discriminating against boys! Well, people keep telling me that ‘girls are so much more fun and cuter’ and it’s fun to dress them up…I’m sure these same people would find other crap to say to me if I had a girl!
This is a good article http://www.parenting.com/article/baby-boy-crazy?sms_ss=facebook&at_xt=4d5c6a055d41e74f%2C0
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^Funny when I concieved I wanted to have a boy becuase I have a niece too and she lived very close and I was with her a lot. I was always buying cute stuff for her so this time around I wanted to have a boy.
Guess what I had a boy mashaAllah and now that I have a very very naughty boy who drives me nuts, I want to have a girl next time: )
I wanted to have both a girl and a boy (I do not mean twins) and if someone from relatives asked me i said the same thing adding that I will be happy with whatever Allah gave me.
I have yet to see that people discrimate boys now in Pakistan.
My sisters and my friends except for one have all told me how their inlaws want them to have a boy.
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Well well well, I thought I was the only person who wanted a baby girl when I have children....
Maybe it's because I think that girls, if given the chance are more intelligent and have a better personality than boys.
Re: reverse gender discrimination
Well well well, I thought I was the only person who wanted a baby girl when I have children....
Maybe it's because * I think that girls, if given the chance are more intelligent and have a better personality than boys. *
THIS is what the OP is talkign about. Now,imagine if I had said that about boys, expect all hell to break loose.
I agree with you Yanzala, Ive felt that too, especially in the people from the younger generation. I guess they feel as if they are compensating for years of discrimination against girls? Even then, its wrong.
Some people just need a chappair...a child is a child is a child.
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you my friend are a sexist womanhater…
Re: reverse gender discrimination
THIS is what the OP is talkign about. Now,imagine if I had said that about boys, expect all hell to break loose. I agree with you Yanzala, Ive felt that too, especially in the people from the younger generation. I guess they feel as if they are compensating for years of discrimination against girls? Even then, its wrong. Some people just need a chappair...a child is a child is a child.
thanks for agreeing, i see that a lot and it bugs me soooooooooo much. you are right, a child is a child, we need to stop discriminating him/her according to the gender.
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Well well well, I thought I was the only person who wanted a baby girl when I have children....
Maybe it's because I think that girls, if given the chance are more intelligent and have a better personality than boys.
Sorry it doesn't work that way! There's no guarantee that a female child will be more intelligent or have a better personality than a boy will. A lot depends on parenting too! You may end up having a dumb little girl with a lot of attitude and drama...there's simply no guarantee of anything!!
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:k:
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Yeah I see people go all awwww waaah when someone says oh I always wanted a girl, I love girls, I adore girls, never wanted a boy, don't like boys, girls are best, boys are xyz (I personally know a case), and you are like get over it, you would've been equally happy and overjoyed if you were blessed with a baby boy. Stop putting a show for some sort of compansation.
And I hate aunties who always utter 'Allah aapo bete se nawaze' every time they see a pregnent woman. Its so heartbreaking and outrageous!