How do you deal with that? I have this bad urge for revenge. I’m bitter on the inside at all times, and I get bad temptations to take revenge. I’ve never been the revenge sort of a person, I just let go. But this time, I feel like I was wronged to the worse extent and I wish horrible things for that one person (something like getting run over or having that person’s genitals damaged). Call me crazy, but I’m not sure how to deal with this feeling.
I feel like I must hurt that person as much as I was in order to feel satisfied. People have told me to leave it upto Allah, but then if it was upto Allah all this horrible stuff wouldn’t have happened. But I need to take this out somehow to feel satisfied. It. Any suggestions on how to deal with this, even a great revenge plan would work lol. Thanks in advance.
How do you deal with that? I have this bad urge for revenge. I'm bitter on the inside at all times, and I get bad temptations to take revenge. I've never been the revenge sort of a person, I just let go. But this time, I feel like I was wronged to the worse extent and I wish horrible things for that one person (something like getting run over or having that person's genitals damaged). Call me crazy, but I'm not sure how to deal with this feeling.
I feel like I must hurt that person as much as I was in order to feel satisfied. People have told me to leave it upto Allah, but then if it was upto Allah all this horrible stuff wouldn't have happened. But I need to take this out somehow to feel satisfied. It. Any suggestions on how to deal with this, even a great revenge plan would work lol. Thanks in advance.
Happens to the best of us but time is definitely a great healer. Till the time you start forgetting it happened, you can continue planning revenge and write about it. Blog or a diary etc. After a year or so, those same details will be source of entertainment for you. Don't bottle up though cause you might end up doing something (stupid).
I felt the same way you do about 2 years ago. I wrote it all down, everything I wanted to do, the way that person made me feel what that person had done to me. I then read it a few times a day gradually as your life is getting on and your doing things then you will forget about the feelings of hurt and you wont look at the paper you wrote the things on. eventually you will be so absorbed in your own life that none of what your feeling now will matter to you.
nearly 2 years on I'm happy, im planning for my future and getting on with life.
we all have these feelings at some stage, what I do in these situations is, every time the thought pops into my head I replace it with something else, basically displace or ignore it, this is really difficult especially when the hurt is fresh, but after a few days sometimes even weeks, the thing doesn't hurt or affect me as it used too, and eventually I manage to get over it somehow or just deal with it in another way. Be the bigger person and let it go, for your own sake if anything, ul feel much better in the long run x
people get hurt due to horrible, mean, nasty, selfish, crap others do to them.
people then continue to hurt themselves by having those things impact them all the time and carrying that burden with them.
I am not as noble as others above..and just let go.
I let go for my sake not theirs', I cant walk around with carrying that burden of anger, hurt.
so in many cases I just let go and move on, not letting a bump in the road ruin the rest of my journey...that is my rational, zen side...lucky ones get that
unlucky ones get my detached, cold, calculating side that will mess em up royally sooner or later whenever I get a chance, as a lesson, and then move on.
Not carrying the hurt and anger is the only commonality between the two approaches.
Talk to a close friend or someone in your family who knows about the situation and whom you can confide in. Pour your heart out. And let them know that it's okay initially for you to talk about your feelings when the wound is still fresh. But after a few days, you need to kick yourself out of the well and embrace life. Live for yourself and the people who truly, genuinely care about your well being. Forget the rest of the world. Don't stop living your life for someone who treated you badly.
just time, self-restraint, ignoring people you have issues with and don't have strength to forgive, and getting away from those people and getting away from that environment.
How do you deal with that? I have this bad urge for revenge. I'm bitter on the inside at all times, and I get bad temptations to take revenge. I've never been the revenge sort of a person, I just let go. But this time, I feel like I was wronged to the worse extent and I wish horrible things for that one person (something like getting run over or having that person's genitals damaged). Call me crazy, but I'm not sure how to deal with this feeling.
I feel like I must hurt that person as much as I was in order to feel satisfied. People have told me to leave it upto Allah, but then if it was upto Allah all this horrible stuff wouldn't have happened. But I need to take this out somehow to feel satisfied. It. Any suggestions on how to deal with this, even a great revenge plan would work lol. Thanks in advance.
Lol sometimes i have the same feelin.... I so damn hope that that certain person dies a death which isbthe worst that the world has seen -.- ....
But okay there is somethin called Karma... And the person that does wrong will meet wrong ( sooner or later) so i leave it for what it is .... And some i give a peace of their own cake ( cuz they deserve it so badly!)
Read this on a friend's FB status and found it relevant to this thread so sharing
'A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they'd be asked the "half empty or half full" question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: "How heavy is this glass of water?"
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything."
It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down
You cannot hold on to things...you have to teach yourself to let go. Its hard but it needs to be done. Why? Because you don't need to go out and punish people...your punishment cannot compare to what Allah swt has in store for them. There IS someone who will teach them a lesson...let Him do it.
woaww wowaww...ya're quiet of a violent lil aish. May be ya're very angry perhaps that is why. The best way in my opinion is to talk to people or seek counselling.
She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything."
It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down
I loved this...its going to stick with me because its true. The more you hold onto things...the worse your own quality of life is. Ashy, its less about the person you're mad at and more about you. The way you handle things says a lot about you as a person. Which is why its important to let go.
Read this on a friend's FB status and found it relevant to this thread so sharing
'A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they'd be asked the "half empty or half full" question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: "How heavy is this glass of water?"
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything."
It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down
I was going to post this here too. When I read it on fb, I thought of this thread :)