Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter : Sit down, sir, we serve anyone.
**
Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can’t you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can’t.
Waiter : Then does it really matter?
**
Customer : Waiter, there’s a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter : Yes Sir, they are not very good swimmers.
**
Customer : Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup.
Waiter : That’s all right, Sir, he won’t drink much.
**
Customer : Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
**
Customer : Waiter, what’s the meaning of this fly in my tea cup?
Waiter : I wouldn’t know, Sir, I’m a waiter, not a fortune teller
**
Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But why aren’t you laughing?
**
Waiter : I’ve stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog’s leg.
Customer : Don’t tell me your problems. Give the menu