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oh my gosh…faizy bhai that was truly adorable…![]()
Re: remind me again…
oh my gosh…faizy bhai that was truly adorable…![]()
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for the one who i posted, us pe asar hota nahi
aap log kahan beech main aa gaye hain.. yar 714 ko sab line say mil kar ek ek hug aur ek ek rose dain.. chalain chalain.. shabaash.. ![]()
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awwww Diddoo
so you can have a bhai like me na…
And the first reply by Faizy sums it all up very nicely. :k:
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i think one has to agree with 714. boys do get away with a lot more especially in desi families. its hypocritical really. independence for girls is discouraged (by parents especially moms) which leaves some desi girls highly vulnerable and confused and others rebellious and bordeline feminazi. perhaps that explains why there arent many desie gals in the middle who have the power to turnaround this hypocritical culture which favors boys. but, if u look real hard you will find its the older generation of women who screw it up for the younger ones and it seems to be a never ending cycle.
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lollypop I totally agree with her and you, but either someone should take a stand against these things or pray that they don't end up doing the samething to their own girls. Its never girls feelings, it how ur khandan thinks about it. How would we be able to answer to .... and ... and ...; so yes it will never be over unless we make it happen.
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714 behen jee u should be sooooooooooo glad u are a woman…the biggest advantage to being a woman is that YOU DONT HAVE TO MARRY A WOMAN..
now cheer up and go spend some of daddy’s money on clothes:blush:
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I object, You don’t have to but you certainly can marry another woman by canadian and austerlian laws and I think there is one another country.
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hehe lesbians should get a special place in heaven just for putting up with the hell they have to in this world with their wives…![]()
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Women are, for a majority of desis, convinced by desi men that they are not able to be independent and think on their own. Desi men tend to be insecure, so they brainwash ladies of their family into being dependent on them, so that they can feel more secure and dominant at home. Women don't understand that desi men need to be helped as much as possible to be great men in the things they do (profession-wise), and they don't help men achieve that goal. In return, they're brainwashed into settling for a subjugated position.
Its all because our societies are very much behind in the world, and the world has advanced considerably without any significant contribution from us (aside from a few desi individuals here and there).
Key: Women need to promote their boys to achieve for the stars. This means, science is not haraaaaaaaam. Technology is not haraaaaaaaaam. Moving forward in life is not haraaaaaaaam. So if you've got a son, don't hound him to get married at 23. Let him make something of himself first and become established in his field. Then worry about marriage.
In turn, you'll see that these sorts of guys are generally the ones who are not bent upon subjugating their women. They want their women to be just as roshan khayaal and active and healthy members of society as they are.
So, its not really that the elder ladies try to make younger ladies' life hell as a form of revenge, as much as its the idea that men and women in our societies need to give up this idea of segregating themselves from each other in everything...and learning to work together to build a productive society. You can't do that if you have a society where girls and guys are not allowed to speak to one another openly and comfortably.
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nop not really .. r u gona kil urself now ?
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PCG a very nice piece of writing.. but unfortunately u are not 100% correct. Not every desi parent thinks that science/technology is haram. I know many many many many successful desi girls who became engineer, doctors, and what not and even after shaadi they are happy to work and to share responsibilities with their husbands.
What you are talking about is true for last generation as they did have some misconceptions due to lack of education and you see far more ppl from that generation who got married between the age of 18 - 23 (in some cases even less) so yeah they did that coz of many social reasons.
coming back to the point.. I still say that there is not definite age of getting married.. I can be well off at the age of 20 doesn’t mean i can’t marry at the age of 20..
khair.. i can go on and on with my rambling .. but this is just my perspective.. which obviously can be totally wrong.. ![]()
btw 714 .. o larki.. u have to be really greatful to Allah that you are a girl.. you will have the best of the best favours from Allah.. u will be a MOM inshaAllah .. ![]()
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Yes, I do believe as well that the problem is slowly going away, since more and more girls and guys are trying to achieve for higher grounds and make advances. But nonetheless, these are more wealthy and middle class families, and they tend to live abroad or in urban areas inside Pakistan. The majority of Pakistani population does not actually live and think like you and I do, and I think most of us urbanized Pakistanis don't realize that, since we haven't seen village life up close in person and we have not directly experienced the widespread ignorance in Pakistan.
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I should ask someone eh, if they are really happy with their partner.
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it has been my experience in dealing with desies that moms run the lives of their daughters and discourage things like advance learning, going away from home for colleges, increased independence etc. stuff like cooking, cleaning and early marriage is encouraged. plus desi aunties never have good things to say about working independent women instead they encourage their daughters and daughters inlaws to do kaam kaaj at home and can't seem to stop talking about them in awe and admiration.
most desi dads usually remain hands off. so if desi women really were interested in changing their current state - looking inwards will be a good place to start.
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Lol lollypop that's so tru... there's a few women in my family who work n my parents looked down on them for that, n they say that early marriages r good and grls shud get married straight out of HS, all that stuff, but when it comes ot me my dad wants me to get a masters, they wud prefer I not marry til i finish college etc, but htey'll be happy with whatever decision i make :)
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only if ur hot..
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I too think ur just going thru that weird time in life, when we question our existence blah blah blah...i remember i hated being a girl when i was younger...and i still do a couple days out of every month! But apart from some of the physical pains we lot have to go thru (periods, pregnancy), i don't think we have it that bad...i personally think most men have hard lives, perhaps it's how we deal with our problems...some women get too emotional about every little thing, and some men are always thinking negative...on the other hand, there r both men and women who have positive attitudes and who can laugh at themselves and at life...
Also, i think that desi ppl are getting better when it comes to these advancements, like PCG said...and as far as getting married...i know that back in the day, parents used to get their kids married at an earlier age...in some families it still happens...i guess it depends on the type of family...my Mum was actually 23 when she got married...i've heard that in Islam it's encouraged to get ur daughter married at an early age, not too early (only wot i've heard)...personally, i think girls shudn't wait longer than when they're 25 to get married...just my view...but yea, 18 is really young...perhaps in Pakistan it will take a little bit longer for these things to change...but i do have some relatives in some "gaoun" (village) in Pakistan, and my Dad's cousin who lived there got married in her mid-20s so i guess ppl are allowing their daughters to become more educated and "enjoy" life a little bit more, before settling down.
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Humans.. never happy or satisfied
"If you haven't all the things you want.. be grateful for the things you don't have that you wouldn't want"
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I’ve seen a lot of desi mums run their kids lives, whether son or daughter…in my family, i think parents r a lil more harder on the guys (just cos they tend to push for more independence i think)…but both my parents have encouraged all of us to be as educated as we can…esp. my Dad, to him there is nothing more impt than education…sometimes i wud get cross at him about this, but anyway, my Mum was the one who wudn’t let me study away from home…my Dad didn’t mind so much, but instead he wud always say that they wud move with me lol, to be closer to the uni! And in my family, esp. my Dad’s side, marriage is NOT encouraged early…and when it comes to housework, my Mum never made us do any early on…cos i guess my Dad didn’t let her…but when we wud help out, my bro and i wud take turns…and now that we’re older, she tells both of us to learn how to clean, cook etc…and well, i feel sorry for those ppl who have to hear desi aunties say bad stuff about independent, working girls…personally, i have never come across any of these thank God ![]()
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The game for a second there you made me so happy...i thought wow for once a guy wants to be a girl instead of the other way around...but ofcourse it was too good to be true.
714 its true we are never happy with what we have, but remember if you have your health you are blessed. so chin up and be thankful for everything.