Re: religion vs rasms
i checked with my qari and he was laughing haha cos he said its a comlicated issue (upsetting in laws, too many people too many views) but as far as i understand it depends on the ‘Niyat’ if you are having like a mehndi party with ladies applying henna and things like that no hindu rasams then its ok…and only music is duffli (Duff) not dholki 
or just singing because women at the time of prophet pbuh did sing (segregated) (no men around) also you can still have fun and games, Islam doesnt say you cant have fun, just avoid things that are of somone elses religion 
he also said what u mentioned simple nikkah etc…but he said asian people just dont get it