Relatives

Lifestyle Relationships
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No, but we do tend to feel more obligated to involve extended family in everything we do. In many circumstances, people do things because they're supposed to, or to avoid hurting someone, or out of fear it will "look bad," not out of true care and love for each other. Our huge weddings have people who are practically strangers to the bride and groom (tho not to the rest of the family). That's how the talk starts. They don't really know you. You're just entertainment, and they'll gossip about you the same way preteens gossip about Serena Vanderwoodsen.

A great ayah to share, STP. Thank you.

Your last point is really well-taken. I think the times I've been most frustrated by relatives is when I've felt I've gone out of my way to help them, to make them feel welcome, to care for them, to celebrate with them, etc, and then have felt rejected, used, and abused.

do you drink
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Re: Relatives

pakistani shadi aur uss mein phadda na ho to shaadi poori nahi hotee, its all normal :hehe:

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Re: Relatives

Desi relatives love attention and being in the center of drama...

~*~ Time Pass June 2012 ~*~
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Re: Relatives

desigirl786, just be careful of black magic. ur khalas will try their best to do it on u and ur husband and make a separation/fight which can lead to divorce. I am a victim so just be careful. keep reciting Quran daily for first two to three years. Recite 3rd Qalma whenever u feel SHIR happening in house.

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Re: Relatives

Mamaof3, same is with my mother. She is 63. She couldnt resist my wifes presense cuz my brothers wife is my khalas daughter and my wife was from outside. we ended up in divorce. Severe magic done....by whom.......my own mother....she used to do strange things and one day wrapped "cloves" in a thread and hang them in our room. two of them......I got her red handed..... next day I saw she had removed them.....during this time my head and heart had severe needles everywhere, shortness of breath....I tried to commit suicide even.......spent 3 months like that in severe fights......ended up in divorce. just after 8 months.....that was my love and mangnee kept for 3 years......she was nice girl......my mom separated us. Later I came to know that my own mother and her sisters are popular for Black Magicin family. Allah sub per reham karey. Ameeen.

~*~ Time Pass June 2012 ~*~
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Re: Relatives

^ you are a victim of your own fallacy...

do you honestly think her khallaz are some sort of witches? Relatives arent evil nor are they supernatural, they are just ordinary human beings with emotional issues.

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Hey mustana, I understand in this situation your mother hated your wife for whatever unjustified reasons, but what was the reason YOU divorced the lady when your saying "she was a nice girl"...and your mom did black magic. It doesn't make sense. That's the point where one should step up for himself and take action. I am assuming you were living together? At that point you should have had a word with your mother & just moved out.

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Re: Relatives

afro, i think theres something wrong up there, if you know what i mean...

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Re: Relatives

ohhhhh so that anty who was "phook-marring in my room the eid i got engaged is the reason why things are the way they are now… :hmmm:

divorcing a “nice” girl that u loved for years cz of black magic makes no sense. Why didn’t u just move out if ur mom hated ur wife so much?

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he just told you guys he became 'ill' or went 'crazy'! it gets out of your control when that happens.

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Re: Relatives

If I had not seen this happen with my own eyes, I wouldn’t believe a word Mustana was saying.. but during my last visit to Pakistan, I saw alot of this happen :hinna:

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Re: Relatives

I was born and raised in Pakistan, and heard alot about this 'stuff', but having come across it, it was just a cause of con artists doing this to make a fast buck.

Aajkal kya rate chal raha hai jin baba ko bhaganey ka? 1lakh, 2 lakh? Cant believe people in this day and age fall for these con-artists. Nothing happens when you 'phoonk' (unless you're superman) or hang a couple of 'cloves' in your bedroom either!!

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When they do black magic or evil on you, u just get crazy and can't control yourself.
Read all my threads under Black Magic and you will come to know.

Jub black magic hota hai toa nani yaad ajateee hai.....Allah sub per reham karey. Ameen.

Average Looking Women
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Animal Fights
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Bring it on! I dare you to do ur kala-chita-jaadu on me. I have heard enough whoppers in my time, and seen enough con-arists. The nani excuse wont work chanda, since I was born after she passed away.

~*~ Time Pass June 2012 ~*~
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Re: Relatives

This talk of black magic reminds me of the time when my mom thought the whole world had done black magic on me when I didn't want to marry the guy of their choice...but then again people say its real...hey it happened during the time of the Prophet didn't it?

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Re: Relatives

^ no.

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Re: Relatives

You know what pisses me off? That my cousin can bring her boyfriend around to her house with ALLLLL our relatives gathered and noone, esp her father, gives a ****. Same father gives US crap about how my husband and I met and makes stupid-ass petty comments about our life together. stupid hypocrites.

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Re: Relatives

^ you dont need to utter your personal issues here. :)

Jealousy and Relatives goes together, Relatives are the people who participate in your happiness only if there is something for them. they will only be on your side again if there is some thing to gain or hope of a gain. Relatives are not chosen by a person. there are some nice souls but no body cares about them though.
So if relatives meet you only cause of something or a reason other than sharing happiness or sadness, why see them anymore?

this is the reason I prefer my friends and family friends over my relatives.

on my sister wedding, mother side of relatives (mamoos) werent happy and didnt want to come, at the end they came with long faces, they should have stayed home.
the reason was why my sister is getting married to a non family person and not a cousin.

same episode repeated on my wedding, one mamoo family participated, other stayed out again because i didnt marry his daughter but someone out of family.

well they done good, as almost all of this mamoo kids need to get married, so i made sure the get the same pain on one of them, but then they complain - why didnt we come? hell they didnt come for the only son of his sister who love him to bits. but hey his son wedding is so important so we should have gone.

this tricky and nasty business goes on. i tend to stay out of it. IF someone meet you without any hidden agenda, see them and share with them, if not then they are relatives only for need or soemthing else. Whats the point of keeping such relatives? friends are far better, they see you and share with you without any other objectives.

I have seen all my relatives changing faces over time, my parents realised now back then how they helped them each and everyone when they can. I am sorry but barring few people everyone seems to be very materialistic in my relatives.

people who have good relatives are lucky, but i hardly know any of them.

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I agree with you on that point amour. Its so sad to hear all these stories. What's wrong with loved one's these days? I cannot imagine treating my sister or brother like that after we have kids...its just ridiculous!!