We hear alot about nands and MILs, but how about the jethani/devrani (brother-in-law’s wives)? Do you get along with them? Just want to hear others’ stories (good and bad). 
Re: relationship with in laws
There have been stories of conflicts between jethani and devrani and they may have nothing at all to do with the MIL. It could simply be the result of jealousy.
I wonder if a toxic MIL could help the jethani and devrani bond. Like if the MIL is nasty to both of em, and this brings the two of them closer since they both have dealt with similar headaches. Ah well, it's better to mind your business and try to be nice to everyone as opposed to starting fires. Easier said than done. Especially hard if you share a roof with in-laws.
Re: relationship with in laws
I only have 1 jaitani who is in paki & we have a decent relationship. Again is is semi-formal since I only seen her on short visits to paki...so yeah. We just call each other on events (holidays/b-days) etc. But when we do talk we get along. I think there was a slight sense of jealousy when I got married as my MIL wouldn't let me do anything...pay extra attention to me etc....but otherwise it's fine. Also I was on good behavior as I was only gonna be with them for 2 months only :)
Re: relationship with in laws
Sometimes its not just the jaitaini or devrani, its their hubbies too. A jaith or devar may not approve of his new bhabhi or cause conflicts between mil and new bahoo. The best policy is to keep your mouth shut and eyes and ears open. The first year of observation can reap many good results.
Re: relationship with in laws
^ wow..hmmm..maybe because I dont have that kind of relationship with my devar/jaiths, I find that hard to believe....but of course every family is different.
Re: relationship with in laws
I have one jethani and we get along very well MA. My husband and jaith tease us by calling us 'langoti saheliyaan' :D
Re: relationship with in laws
oh susral is all DRAMA…u just hav to pretend,pretend and pretend to be veryyyyy nice:barbie:
They way you perceive your Jethani will depend on which of the following cases you fall under.
CASE1: (You are financially weaker than your Jethani)
"My Jethani and brother in law are wicked. They always try to downgrade me by flaunting their jewellery, clothes, electronics etc etc. They are very arrogant. The Jethani hardly does any work around the house. I am the one who does all the household chores. Infact, i am the one who takes good care of my MIL and FIL. But despite all this, my MIL seems to give more respect to the Jethani !!!!!
MERI TO KISMAT HE KHARAB HAI !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
CASE2: (You are financially stronger than your Jethani)
"My Jethani and brother in law are OK. They take good care of the house, although sometimes, Jethani gets a little too bossy, especially in the kitchen. Also, Jethani jee does not have a very good taste in clothes, and food presentation. I would like her to change that, but i cannot because MIL seems to like everything she does. MIL also likes to spend more time with her. But thats OK. I am not too much willing to get praises from my MIL anyway :P.
Bus chup kar kay jitna time guzarta hai, guzaaro"
kya baat haiiiiiiiiiiiii…aalaaaaaaaaaa observation …
…i wonder a boy has such an observation abt these relationzz…heheh..anyways like it..
Thankyou!
Its Old Boy actually
Thankyou!
Its Old Boy actually :)
*hahahahaha..oh yeah i didnt notice..then itz ok :p
*
Re: relationship with in laws
what i've noticed is that the younger one gets prefential treatment to the older ones. the in-laws have usually already dealt with the older ones and can possibly be on bad terms with them so now are on the best behavior with the younger ones. i've noticed arranged marriage bahus get better treatment than love marriage ones because they are mothers choice. i've noticed gair bahus get preferential treatment than niece bahus because of new family integration nayee cheez ki ziada value type a deal. these differences can lead to divisions like old crowd teaming up against new crowd. depends on every situation and on how many there are...
Re: relationship with in laws
jee i get along very well. we are like sisters mA
They way you perceive your Jethani will depend on which of the following cases you fall under.
CASE1: (You are financially weaker than your Jethani)
"My Jethani and brother in law are wicked. They always try to downgrade me by flaunting their jewellery, clothes, electronics etc etc. They are very arrogant. The Jethani hardly does any work around the house. I am the one who does all the household chores. Infact, i am the one who takes good care of my MIL and FIL. But despite all this, my MIL seems to give more respect to the Jethani !!!!!
MERI TO KISMAT HE KHARAB HAI !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
CASE2: (You are financially stronger than your Jethani)
"My Jethani and brother in law are OK. They take good care of the house, although sometimes, Jethani gets a little too bossy, especially in the kitchen. Also, Jethani jee does not have a very good taste in clothes, and food presentation. I would like her to change that, but i cannot because MIL seems to like everything she does. MIL also likes to spend more time with her. But thats OK. I am not too much willing to get praises from my MIL anyway :P.
Bus chup kar kay jitna time guzarta hai, guzaaro"
what i've noticed is that the younger one gets prefential treatment to the older ones. the in-laws have usually already dealt with the older ones and can possibly be on bad terms with them so now are on the best behavior with the younger ones. i've noticed arranged marriage bahus get better treatment than love marriage ones because they are mothers choice. i've noticed gair bahus get preferential treatment than niece bahus because of new family integration nayee cheez ki ziada value type a deal. these differences can lead to divisions like old crowd teaming up against new crowd. depends on every situation and on how many there are...
Interesting observations.
Re: relationship with in laws
Hhmm im hopefully get jethani very soon...! I really do hope we will get along...IshaAllah!
Re: relationship with in laws
My jethani is aight...dont really know her too well.
I got on great with both of them.......until we all went to Pak, we all live in different countrys but they came over for the wedding, and we went over to them to spend eid and stuff, had a great time, decided we will go together when we go to Pak.
It was my first time to meet his extended family, and i think she just could not stand the attention i was getting (remember i was newly married in to thier family, so naturally there was an element of curiousity).
Anyway we left Pak, and after that its never been the same, in fact she made a comment recently to by hubby to say how things have changed since "we all got married" obviously relating this to us, as she's been married over 20years.
very well said neha…
Re: relationship with in laws
thank god i don't have one!
....but i have 2 nands...
Re: relationship with in laws
I love my jethani. She treats me like a younger sister since shes about 10 years older than me. She takes me shopping all the time and she lets me borrow her clothes and handbags.