What a tough thing it is to face when something may be wrong with your child. Most, if not all, parents go thru a period of denial but the thing that will benefit the child most is quick action to address any and all issues there may be.
I was so heartbroken to read of the death of John Travolta’s 16 year old son. There had been speculation for years that the boy was autistic. He rarely spoke, was rarely seen in public, was led by the hand even as a teenager. His parents are scientologists who do not beleive in any type of neurological trouble, do not beleive in any type of therapy that could benefit autism-like disorders. They also do not beleive in treating seizure disorders with anti-seizure meds. It looks like the kid died from a fall he took while suffering a seizure.
My heart bleeds for them and I pray for them as they suffer such a great loss. And also I wonder if this will change them.
How do you think you as a parent would react…if at some point, you heard from a family member or friend that your child should be checked out for developmental delays?
Re: recognizing or denying developmental issues? (Jett Travolta)
Peace Mamaof3
Very thought provoking topic. It is not something that comes naturally to mind, but it is perhaps something every parent fears and tries to put at the back of their minds.
From the moment they are born we hold our breath until we are sure that they are not holding theirs.
We check their little digits for perfection
As they grow we worry 'immunise or not immunise' ...
As they develop ... it comes later in the chain especially psychological development and educational development ... we sort of take a back seat ... most parents are concerned with the outward aspects first, which is natural because it is more blatant an issue to deal with.
Also the neurological problems as you described above may take time to develop before you realise that a child needs developmental therapy. Things like this come for a reason and we often ask why did the unsinkable ship Titanic actually sink on its first voyage and why did deniers of neurological disorders get a child who had one ... it can be perceived as a dark irony ... or may be a lesson to learn ...
My heart goes to them also, but with my heart I have hopes that this should prompt some sort of greater understanding for them and for other parents around.
In terms of reacting ... I would tend to bear everything in mind what people tell me without giving it too much concern until I have found evidence to support the claims. It is important not over-react but it is also important not to turn a blind eye.
How do you think you as a parent would react...if at some point, you heard from a family member or friend that your child should be checked out for developmental delays?
Don't really know how I would react, as not a parent yet, but having had to give parents news like that is...erm somewhat awful. I dont know how to lie, never have so parents must find it really difficult when i have to 'break' the news.
Most parents dont really read up on things like dyslexia or autism and usually just go on hearsay of friends and neighbours. Thats difficult to deal with.
Also, every single child in an individual and they all have individual traits. Some parents compare their autistic child to another and in my professional opinion, its really difficult to get parents not to do that.
I just focus on the positives all the time and encourage the parents to see what their children can do, not what they can't.
Re: recognizing or denying developmental issues? (Jett Travolta)
I guess I would consider the source... but that's how I am in every area of life. There's a common saying which is take advice from someone who has the fruit on the tree...meaning that if let's say Milly met my children and even though she doesn't have kids of her own as of yet, she is educationally qualified to diagnose a learning disorder in a child, and I would therefore take what she said seriously. I may not accept it or like it, but at the back of my head, I would know to proceed for some further investigations. But if auntyji2 at auntyji1's party told me that my daughter had a bean shaped head that needed a rice-filled sack for correction, I think I wouldn't take it too seriously...not that I am trying to mock at her experience as a mom or something but really, most people love giving free advice which is usually worthless.
I guess I would consider the source... but that's how I am in every area of life. There's a common saying which is take advice from someone who has the fruit on the tree...meaning that if let's say Milly met my children and even though she doesn't have kids of her own as of yet, she is educationally qualified to diagnose a learning disorder in a child, and I would therefore take what she said seriously. I may not accept it or like it, but at the back of my head, I would know to proceed for some further investigations. But if auntyji2 at auntyji1's party told me that my daughter had a bean shaped head that needed a rice-filled sack for correction, I think I wouldn't take it too seriously...not that I am trying to mock at her experience as a mom or something but really, most people love giving free advice which is usually worthless.
Aww I love the fact that you would appreciate my concern and observations.
However, I always tell my parents, im not a professionally qualified Ed Psych or Pediatrician.
I can only make observations from what I see. I always, always, ensure my parents talk to the School SENco (special educational needs coordintor) about any concerns aswell as talking to me and then go to their doctor.
One partictular child in my class is dealing with a lot of issues right now and I meet mum on a weekly, sometimes daily basis to talk about how his day in school has been, iv always just said that im not really qualified, however, I have noticed such and such. His mum eventually saw a Psychiatrist and he was able to confirm all concerns I and the SENco had, but mum believed him more as hes a professional and he does what he does on a daily basis.
I seem to forget that I have 29 other children to deal with, I just want to 'fix' this one little boy and make him smile. Its hard.
Re: recognizing or denying developmental issues? (Jett Travolta)
Maybe you're not a qualified health practitioner but you are in the area of child development and care...and yes so are moms. Like I have 2 kids and I know a lot about parenting issues but I can only guess how it is like to raise a teenager from maybe when I was a teenager or from other parents experiences. But someone who is raising a teenager will be in a better position to answer teenage issues.
So my point was that the value of advice comes from the credibility of the source. And my reactions or actions are usually based on that.
What a tough thing it is to face when something may be wrong with your child. Most, if not all, parents go thru a period of denial but the thing that will benefit the child most is quick action to address any and all issues there may be.
I was so heartbroken to read of the death of John Travolta's 16 year old son. There had been speculation for years that the boy was autistic. He rarely spoke, was rarely seen in public, was led by the hand even as a teenager. His parents are scientologists who do not beleive in any type of neurological trouble, do not beleive in any type of therapy that could benefit autism-like disorders. They also do not beleive in treating seizure disorders with anti-seizure meds. It looks like the kid died from a fall he took while suffering a seizure.
My heart bleeds for them and I pray for them as they suffer such a great loss. And also I wonder if this will change them.
How do you think you as a parent would react...if at some point, you heard from a family member or friend that your child should be checked out for developmental delays?
he died during a seizure, my God, my heart is bleeding too. My own little daughter suffers from epilepsy and it could have been my child :(
he died during a seizure, my God, my heart is bleeding too. My own little daughter suffers from epilepsy and it could have been my child :(
May God bless & protect your daughter. I can not imagine how difficult it is. I don't know how I would handle such a situation, but I would definitely keep an open mind and if it's coming from a reliable source, like Niksik mentioned, I would get it checked out. And also regular pediatric visits are good, as doctor assesses everything about normal growth, etc...health....so I trust him to realize if god forbid something is wrong as well.
Re: recognizing or denying developmental issues? (Jett Travolta)
boredom, may your daughter be blessed with angels watching over her...and protect her protectors - her parents! from harm.
As this tragedy unfolds, it seems that the young Travolta suffered from severe grand mal seizures, they had him on Depakote for a few years. The seizures went from 3 or 4 a week to about once every 2 or 3 months. After a few years tho, it didnt work as well so his parents decided to stop anit-seizure medication. Completely. They did not try different dosage, did not try different meds. They just stopped about a year before the fatal mishap. This is possibly due to the religious values and doctrines of Christian Science...they do not accept anything at all in the realm of psychiatric or psychological problems or medications. Those issues are considered to be "personal weakness" which can be overcome by "trying harder". Anti-seizure meds are within the realm of psychiatrically prescribed meds so they dont like that at all. And to even suggest that the kid may have been autistic they find to be a personal affront. Those seizures are relatively common in some autistic children...yet they are not allowed to acknowledge autism as a diagnosis nor to treat it.
According to autopsy, the boy did not evidence fatal or even severe trauma to the head. He may have fallen and hit his head but any injury was too small to have caused any issue. Cause of death was "seizure".
Boredom I'm sure you have your daughters interests at heart and are treating her seizures with prescribed meds yeah? The Travolta boy had grand-mal seizures about once a week without any medication for a year. So I dont think you need to worry (more than you already do :) )
