I WILL NEVER GO TO MY BEST FRIEND X PARTY WHATSO EVER! UNLESS MY BEST FRIEND IS GOING WITH ME. SIMPLE. THERE IS DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GOOD FRIEND AND BEST FRIEND.
Orange: it's not a pretty world we live. I could only reckon as far as losing a loved one and then moving on; it's tough nonetheless, no matter how resilient and emotionless one thinks he is. I mean, one can always find higher plateaus and challenges in life to move on to, having said that; you need that freedom and open spaces to really vent out your feelings without having any fear/responsibility of commitments. Maybe, it's different for guys.
After reading what you have said, I have really no words of consolence. All I can say is that, you only live once, and if push has come to shove then get rid of this husband. At least, they’re maybe a chance of finding someone down the road. But, don't spend the rest of your life as you are being garroted each day.
Wishing you all the happiness and prosperity
[This message has been edited by Abdullah k (edited August 07, 2002).]
This is rare
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Sorry for you situation Orange…
my thoughts..
“duniya mey aur bhi ghum hai mohabat key sivah”
Let it go.. it’ll be less painful for you.
therez no such thing as ‘real friendz’…sab ko kaam se gherz hai…gherz puri ho gaye to ‘tum koun te hum koun’ pe ajatay hein…
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/nook.gif
God bless u all…
DerVaisH
Ai khuda jazba-e-ehsaas na bakhsha hota…
Acha hota ager pather ka tarasha hota…
Waja-e-tehQeer hon insanon mein insan ho ker…
Pather ka hota to inhe insanon ne pooja hota…
Not tru…
I am your friend whether you like it or not.. and mujay koyee gherz nahee… and if you want my help yes I will fly to where ever dervy land is and help!!!
forgive and forget.. let it go and move on orange ..
good friends are hard to find.. if she really is ur friend..talk to her see what she has to say. there are 2 sides to the stories :)
Tragic!! Are you living in England, by any chance? Its all too common there.
When I was at university there, so many female freinds went thru the same crap. Their boyfreinds would got to Pak on vacation with their families, and come back married......having dated their g/freinds for over 3 years!!!!! No f*****g balls!!
The girls would then get forced into marraige with a cousin in Pak.....by their parents.
If they then demand a divorce...they are ousted from the family....or in some cases....the opposite.....hunted down by their families!!!!
If you really don't like this husband.....leave him NOW.
I don't know if you have consumated the marraige yet or not.
Easier to get it anulled than divorce......but either is worth it NOW....BEFORE you have any kids.
If you MUST leave home....then you will need all the freinds in the world. Better if you can find a surrogate family......somewhere to visit on Eid, birthdays, etc. You won't fall apart....or feel too alone.
You already have a world of freinds here on Gup Shup. From what I have seen of these people, they will move Heaven and Earth to help each other out.......and thats without ever having met each other face-to-face. Imagine what they will do for you once they meet you?!!
Explain one thing to me, tho'. I don't get the 'status' issue you mentioned.......do you mean like Caste? Or wealth?
Are people THAT backward, still? Are his folks from Mirpur or Jhelum by any chance?
Last advice....emigrate if you can.....tell your family you have a job abroad for a year and you have to go.
Then anull the marraige from there.
Toronto/Chicago/NYC have a lot of Pakistanis...you will get swallowed up there...and won't even be homesick!
More often, creating a thread and discussing it is an art form. :)
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by AnokhaUK: *
If you really don't like this husband.....leave him NOW.
I don't know if you have consumated the marraige yet or not.
Easier to get it anulled than divorce......but either is worth it NOW....BEFORE you have any kids.
[/QUOTE]
agreed... cuz once u have kids... it becomes 10 times harder 2 get divroce.... but im still SSOOO surprised at wat ur poarents did... not that i havent seen it happen.. but just doesnt make sense 2 me how they can ignore the fact that this guy can never adjust with their daughter... since they have been brought up XTREMELY differently... as 4 the frend... i agree with dervaish when he said that there r no "true" frendz.... so i think u shud just call her up... say oh dun worry bout watever happeend... meet her once a mnth or 2 mtnhs..... sumthing like that... cuz that way.. u feel goodbout urself... taht ur being nice a person who was a b***** 2 u...
tum ab mujhay dara rahi ho kaki-munni 
help..help..help…baba in trouble
Rab Rakha
DerVaisH
Ask your parents one question.........Do they want you to suffer the rest of your life with that jerk and is your father going to provide for him the rest of his life until one day your father can't do that anymore and then he decides to pull that desi remedy of sending you back to your parents until the cash flow begins to come in again............
And what business has this jerk getting married when he can't take care of himself financially let alone take care of you in the future.
Orange, stand up for yourself..........because in the end when you are facing worse problems when he is with you, it will be you on your own..........It is your life and you will have to face it alone.
yeah i agree with tasavur ... but if that doesnt work then id say get a job .. cuz that way ull be in a better position to stand up for urself ... i mean ur parents threat to disown u woudnt have that much of an impact . But in the end its all upto how u handle the situation .