Re: Re-marrying
she should remarry...after 8 months of being away dont u have to do the nikkah all over again neways???? thats wut i heard...
Re: Re-marrying
what an ass.. she should divorce and marry the guy who loves her!! 
Re: Re-marrying
Yeah, she's been through a lot at a very young age. Was her life like that of a princess when dad was alive, it became a hell after his death. But oh well, she's kind of into routine again.. making new friends, altough it's hard for her to trust anyone. We talk a lot and I complety feel with her..
There's a lawyer already busy with this case, and it won't be difficult to get the divorce. But divorce based on European Law doesn't mean it's a divorce based on Islamic Law automatically, is it? Umer, thank you for this helpful information. I'll pass it on. And yeah, there is no way to get the nationality back from him, so it has to be this way.
ChupKeSe: 8 months? Is that the period which has to pass before one could get khula?
Daysee Behna: It sure is a complicated situation. There is already a lawyer busy with it... so no worried about the divorce. But yeah, nobody should go through these kind of circumstances. Yeah, I'll print it out and let her read... I was just trying to answer all questions on behalf of her... and according to what I know, i don't think it will be a yes... either she will loose her temper and tell him to leave her alone, or otherwise he will become impatient and just walk away...
About the other guy who wants to marry her, I personally think he's just being attracted towards her. She is the kind of person who wants to live her own life-style and live with her mom for a few years now. But he is kind of pushing her into a relationship... She told him that she sees him as just a friend, but he still gives her more attention than she actually wants... He gives her no space you know... so that actually ticks her off... Instead of making her smile, he makes her even more sad sometimes by saying the wrong things... as he thinks in a kind of ego-centric way... In the beginning I thought she might like him as well, but when I talked to her.. it was completely the opposite. Talking in a friendly way to people is her nature, and some people take wrong conclusions out if it. But oh well... Thank you everyone for the advices :-)
Re: Re-marrying
according to my understanding, u mean he has died, then from islamic view point u dont need to divorce a women before dying. once the man is dead the nikkah is over, infact she cannot even touch late husbands body . she can get into another nikkah after completing her “idaat” i-e a time period of 4 months , i think
Re: Re-marrying
He didn’t die.. It was my bad choice of words, that’s why you got interpretated wrong. But he didn’t die, he just left her… I wrote the whole story in detail.. in my previous posts in this thread.
Re: Re-marrying
watever she does, she shouldnt have anything to do with her first husband...divorce ASAP! I hope he burns in hell for what he did n may Allah give her hapiness in the next relationship
Re: Re-marrying
She has to divorce first DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH u watching to much Bollywood movie's or someting?
Re: Re-marrying
Tikhi, yeah she's busy with it.. applied for a divorce in the court, let's see what happens next.
Nilu, I know she has to divorce before she could actually marry again according to European law, but my question was actually more meant in the Islamic point of view. Isn't it like this that the guy can divorce the woman.. and the woman can only apply for khula after a certain period has passed? And here this girl doesn't even know where the guy is at the moment... so... I don't know if I'm 100% correct.. but I guess in her case it is possibe to apply for khula in the Islamic court. Oh and by the way, I don't think I said anything this way.. which made you be so sarcastic about it. If you couldn't leave an useful or nice comment, you shouldn't have replied at all... as I said in my first post already... only serious replies!
Re: Re-marrying
^D-O-S I don't think that she needs to wait for a certain period of time to get khula (I'll check with a scholar or a pro Islami shariya law person-but u've to wait a millennia before I get back to u on that). I think the reason why such a period is appointed is to see if the married woman is expecting a child from that husband...since one can't be divorced in such a state...hence they have this waiting period...God I'm so not sure about it. Give me some time. But regardless, she has all rights for filing a divorce if not expecting (which i know she isn't) besides the dude has been gone missing for too long anyway.
Ok my main reason for replying is in regards to this....
[quote]
but he still gives her more attention than she actually wants... He gives her no space you know... so that actually ticks her off... Instead of making her smile, he makes her even more sad sometimes by saying the wrong things... as he thinks in a kind of ego-centric way
[/quote]
Remember Remember...if anyone makes u feel like this before marriage or commitment, they will get only worse afterwards. When the part of vows says, 'for better or for worse' its actually 'for worse' on most occassions while getting into a marriage contract. If one may be comfortable with a sane stable head with the 'worse' part of the better half, then u're ok. But if its what u've described above, trust me trust me...it only deteriorate and the relationship only rots furthers. I would strongly recommend that she does not even comes in contact with this new character. He can be emotionally blackmailing her, but she should not fall into it. It only gets more abusive later on.
If she wants to spend time with her mother, she should do so. She should give her self enough space to recollect what she has lost during those miserable years. One really really need alot of room to breath freely and put past behind them. I know its a painful process and its very hard but its important to let time heal the soul after suffering such horrible things. All this takes considerable amount of time. Although its vital that she remedies her broken heart and tends the wounds fully before she can come in terms to let herself to trust again. Insha Allah!
Re: Re-marrying
if she really doesnt like the other guy dont marry him. she deserves better!
Re: Re-marrying
Dasht i was serious (sorry) Ive read in the Quran if the husband leave's his wife for a long time phir Nikaah khatam hojatey hai but im not sure about it.