Re: Questions for Papa aahmed & papa shikra
Before I answer, let me just say this: Aahmed, please don't be offended by my explanation below because that is not my intention.
**Eco: **I live in USA. I don't think that my kids will turn out to be white washed. I guess the reason would be that our family is really closely attached to the culture. I am not saying that other families aren't and my family is the only family or it's the best family on the face of the earth. What I mean is that Alhamdulillah Maha's grandparents are alive and live close by. They will make sure that she keeps in touch with her culture. In addition, I will make sure that she'll respect her roots and will adhere to her culture and her identity, to where her parents come from.
I believe if you are attached with your kids from the childhood, it really matters. I have seen desi parents "telling" there kids what to do and what not to do. They don't expect their kids to ask "why". They simply want things done. In our case, I won't force her to do anything against her wishes where she does it for my sake, not for her own sake. I will put the right and wrong in front of her but I will equip her with the tools that she will need to make the right judgement. Again, what kind of friends you have also matters and how much freedom you have also matters. I've seen desi parents blindly trusting their kids and spoiling them and really feeling proud when they acted like gorey. But when the same kids grew up and started treating their parents like gorey do, it wasn't funny anymore. And I don't mean to say all gorey are bad and don't ahere to their culture or good habits.
I hope I made sense.