Question

[Sara516]

Re: Physical Relationship before marriage

This is not entirely true. You can train them all you want, but there are extrinsic factors that will push them towards these things, and there is nothing they can do about it...'cept.. Do it legally. (i.e. get married)

*Yes there is something you can do about it, it's called self control :p. Sex is never a reason to get married, yeah its one thing to look forward to t, but lust does die out once in a while. If you have the values ull stay away from it. It's not easy at all but it's do-able :p *

I'm sure most of our grandparents got married when they were 14-15, because marriages at an early age were the "thing" back in the day.
I don't know why its so "bad" to get married young.

*Yeah, but that was a different era :p When my mom was my age, they didnt' really believe in educating their daughters and now that's not the case, most rational, sane people understand that education is important. My point is, society changes and what was right then doesnt really work now. *

You can be a 16 year old mature girl, marrying a 26 year old immature guy...it depends.

16 year old girls are more mature than 20 year old guys :p

You're not "established" or "fully developed" ever in life...you just struggle through it, no matter what comes at you :)

That's true, but there is a huge difference between , say, 16 and 22. There's a differnece between a 16 year old guy who is still in school, and a 22 year old whos graduated college and working and is able to support his family.

[Crescent]

Re: Physical Relationship before marriage

[quote=Sara516]

*Yes there is something you can do about it, it's called self control :p. Sex is never a reason to get married, yeah its one thing to look forward to t, but lust does die out once in a while. If you have the values ull stay away from it. It's not easy at all but it's do-able :p *

You can control yourself, alhumdulillah lots of people do. But it is possible that it can get to apoint where you can lose it, because (especially in the west) there are times when its thrown at you, and you have no control over it...its possible. It can reach a stage where people can loose control...

*Yeah, but that was a different era :p When my mom was my age, they didnt' really believe in educating their daughters and now that's not the case, most rational, sane people understand that education is important. My point is, society changes and what was right then doesnt really work now. *

Marriage does NOT stop one from attaining education, or developing oneself financially. Marriage is a union that has nothing to do with what degree or education a person has..or is willing to get.

16 year old girls are more mature than 20 year old guys :p

You never know..everyone is different rite? THat can't be a definite fact...

That's true, but there is a huge difference between , say, 16 and 22. There's a differnece between a 16 year old guy who is still in school, and a 22 year old whos graduated college and working and is able to support his family.

*22 year old does not necessarily mean finished school, well established guy. *

---

But here in this case 16 is not the guy's age.
For example, a 35 year old guy, married, can lose his job. then what? ANd he tries to get a new one, but its becoming hard, so he has to go back to school to study more, to get a 'better job'. WHen he comes out, still no luck! Till then, hez doing some small job to just survive.
**
How is this man different than a 21 year old , or 20, 19, 18, 17 etc etc

I can understand the difference in piety of a person..and thats just not my "narrow" islamic view... thats my logical practical view. Something people are afraid to try, because society has other rules.

How can we trust society so much with our decision in life, and put aside the way God has told us to live our life...the one who..created us?**

[Sara516]

Re: Physical Relationship before marriage

*Yes there is something you can do about it, it's called self control :p. Sex is never a reason to get married, yeah its one thing to look forward to t, but lust does die out once in a while. If you have the values ull stay away from it. It's not easy at all but it's do-able :p *

You can control yourself, alhumdulillah lots of people do. But it is possible that it can get to apoint where you can lose it, because (especially in the west) there are times when its thrown at you, and you have no control over it...its possible. It can reach a stage where people can loose control...

**Okay, exactly what situations is it thrown at you? You don't have to go to clubs and parties or anythng of the sort.. You don't have to be freinds with any girls at school, so there's no danger of developing feelings. If yu're out at the mall or wherever, you can keep your gaze lowered and ignore any girls (or guys :D) that check you out or try to flirt with you. The only way it can be totally unavoidable is if your'e already in that situation, i.e. you've already had physical contact with them, and in that case that's your fault, you can't blame society.

***Marriage does NOT stop one from attaining education, or developing oneself financially. Marriage is a union that has nothing to do with what degree or education a person has..or is willing to get.*
**I'm sure marriage, in theory, should NOT stop one from attaining education or development. But in our society and culture (Pakistani) do you think tha'ts really realistic to say? If girls are studying, they are often "encouraged" to quit working. Marriage takes work, someone has to pay the bills, put food on the table, a roof over your heads etc, if you think you can do that with only a high school education, then..i dunno what to tell you. And in the situation that your parents will be helping you out by sharing house/groceries etc, all I can tell you is that its no good to be dependent on anyone. You have to be able to stand on your own two feet. You have to be practical when i comes to marriage.

**
You never know..everyone is different rite? THat can't be a definite fact...
**It's a fact girls mature physically/mentally/etc before guys :p Exceptions exist, but in general girls tend to mature faster than guys.

---

I can understand the difference in piety of a person..and thats just not my "narrow" islamic view... thats my logical practical view. Something people are afraid to try, because society has other rules.****
Er nobody said anything about peity; this is your practical view, this is my practical view that 16 year olds shouldn't marry.

---

How can we trust society so much with our decision in life, and put aside the way God has told us to live our life...the one who..created us?**

*Since when is it farz to get married at a young age? We get married when we feel the time is right NOT be controlled by our hormones. We're supposed to have self control and disciplien in most aspects of life, in food, drink, prayer, hygiene etc. So why should we marry when we're 15-16 jus coz we're horny? There's nothing wrong in going by the society you live in AS LONG AS it doesn't totally go against Islam, that goes for Canada, America, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia and etc etc
*

[K4plan]

Re: Question

If you cannot get rid of temptation, yield to it ;).

[hussain87]

Re: Physical Relationship before marriage

@Crescent_

And yeah, Islamically…You are fine…cept for the dirty talk… plz refrain from it …for now atleast.

P.S. The younger the better…more energy…more fun…you don’t wanna be a boring adult that fast… hehe

:k:

[ImranQ]

Re: Question

@Afridi786

age doesn’t matter if both girl and guy r willing. hes 20 so i think he’s old enuff, and girl’s 17, thats old enuff

:k:

why you guys are harassing her why portraying ugliest of pictures why so pessimistic.

as per islam 16 means baligh hence she is allowd to marry and all. Some people don’t mature even at the age of 60 to begin with

[AnGeL_EyEs]

Re: Question

@Crescent_

Oh yeah?

Hope you’re blessed with someone young

[hussain87]

Re: Question

@ImranQ

:k:

why you guys are harassing her why portraying ugliest of pictures why so pessimistic.

as per islam 16 means baligh hence she is allowd to marry and all. Some people don’t mature even at the age of 60 to begin with

hey if she do get married now then she wouldn,t be able to have fun like some girls have till they get ‘‘mature’’ enough to
settle down:rolleyes: …its wrong to marry at age of 17 cuz time of our beloved prophet muhammad :saw: were different then ours:o …hope u extremist ppl get this in ur friggen head. …

[AnGeL_EyEs]

Re: Physical Relationship before marriage

@hussain87

:k:

just so u know…he isnt just talking about the girl being young ONLY…he is talking about the guy as well…

just a side note to all ur sickos out there.

[Sara516]

Re: Question

@hussain87

hey if she do get married now then she wouldn,t be able to have fun like some girls have till they get ‘‘mature’’ enough to
settle down:rolleyes: …

Yeahhhhhhhhh coz all older girls who are not married are out doing “haram” and indecent things

[hussain87]

Re: Question

[quote]

just a side note to all ur sickos out there. :p

[/quote]

yahaan par koi bi bimaar nahi sab shareef loog hain:p ....

[Amani06]

Re: Question

Personally i think 16 is a bit too young to be getting hitched. However each to their own.....

[sweetpip]

Re: Question

Some girls on this site have been very pessimistic and harsh. It is well known that girls mature quicker than boys. If she is willing and feels ready to marry at 16, then who are we to criticise.

I know girls who have got married at the age of 16, and are perfectly happy in their choice. Not everyone wants to study and work. I jut don't think we should criticise soemone who does not agree with our perspective.

As someone also said above, at 16 she is legally and morally allowed to get married. I'm sure a lot of guppy's parents were married at such an age. Would u still say that they were too young to get married?

[Crescent]

Re: Question

^ GOOD answer.

[sweetpip]

Re: Question

Thanxs C

[ZaA_A_ma]

Re: Question