Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
Jesus, this is all so ridiculous!!!
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
?
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
I hate all this lena dena. Of course, people exchange gifts come weddings and birthdays etc but people (not just in laws) have made this into a show. Keep this to a minimum please and especially at wedding time where people should be comfortable with no exchanges at all especially the whole dowry thing is awful. But its easier said than done.
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
You are right @eastern11 it is not easy. Need of the hour is a mental revolution. We must think what actions could become evil for society. Every change begins from home.
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
This is absolutely ridiculous. Girls, even if your families are willing and offering, why are you allowing this dena/lena to continue? My parents are very comfortable and I am their only child. Needless to say, they would have gone completely over the top at my wedding if I allowed it. However, I was adamant that this would not happen. They raised me, gave me a great education and provided me with the best things in life. They should not have to BRIBE a family in order to marry me (which is essentially what all this lena/dena comes down to). Have some self respect and stop this nonsense. A guy’s family should be honored to be entrusted with someone’s daughter. It shouldn’t be a business opportunity. I told my husband before we ever got married that we aren’t doing any of this crap and he completely agreed and said his family was onboard as well. My family is financially successful because they work very hard. I would much rather that they go on a lavish vacation, buy a new car…hell, donate their money before they use it to buy me a groom. In fact, after the wedding was done, they had money left over in the budget and we donated it.
All this does not mean that you have to completely stop with all gifts, but it should be REASONABLE. My husband’s family is punjabi and in their family, they bring gifts at the engagement. They brought an outfit, jewelry set, shoes, clutch for me and outfits for my parents and aunts/uncles. We just gave them a basket of mithai and the groom cash (nothing over the top, $500). In my family, any exchange of gifts is done at the wedding so we got them similar items at the wedding (outfits for the females, a small pairs of earrings for his 2 sisters, colognes and sweaters for the guys). At the wedding, my dad gave my husband a nice watch, his parents gave me jewelry. When all was said and done, both families probably spent a similar amount of money on gifts for each other which I think is fair. My family would get gifts for anyone who got them some so it was more about social etiquette than them being the grooms family.
Anyway, girls- you need to stand up for yourself and the female gender at large. Don’t you feel the least bit guilty putting this kind of pressure or expectations on your parents? Put an end to this crap already.
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
You did what I think. It needs courage to apply principles in real life. Kudos to both families. We need many more like you to eradicate this evil from society.
Re: Q for the engaged ppl: Specific Engagement gift ideas for groom’s family-US based
Good for you, Anjul. I hope you get to do what you want when the time comes 