Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Lifestyle Relationships
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Here is the Questions thread:

http://www.paklinks.com/gs/life-and-relationships/498128-q-and-a-zindagi-aur-aap-aaj-ka-mehmaan-psyah-and-hareem.html

And here are their answers! Psyah and hareem when you’re ready! :smiley:

Thanks so much both of you for taking your time and answering all these questions!

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

Wheres the answers

:khums:

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

You have to "imagine"that the answers are here.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh wow! What great answers Psyah and Hareem..just wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww :@:

Like that, LondonsFinest, like that.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Ah. Now I understand. Thanks.

I've just imagined and read through them......shocking stuff!! :o

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

I kow, right :nahi:?

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

Most shocking secrets have been revealed :cb:

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Peace All

Ok here we go bey sabree log!

Sister Kinzz if you read my blog entries more is on that subject, but basically I was in Pakistan and bought an engagement ring for her. She was sort of embarrassed and didn’t want to get engaged to me at first because she felt I was a “challa sada” for not being able to speak Urdu properly. But when she heard me speak English she became happier with the idea of it. It was no surprise to both of us the intention was always there the family didn’t help out they sort of raised her expectations.

diwana, do opposites attract? Well there is this scientific theory that sort of justifies that way of thinking. However the term opposite has two meanings. Opposite as in facing one another and opposite as in differently charged. One can be called magnetic attraction of opposite sexes and the other can be gravitational attraction of ‘oppositely facing’ bodies.
I guess by asking this question you are saying how different hareem01 and myself are … I concur but that is only because she wants to be different and known for her own personality and I have no problem with that. Deep down inside we are more similar than she cares to admit.

Sahar02 envisaging the future for our children is difficult to answer that would be tantamount to attempting to know the unknown. For example I told my parents that I want to be fireman, policeman, astronaut, secret agent and so on, but I ended up to where I am today … see my answer to philosophy … I do however have a hope … I wish them to be pious and hardworking in whatever field they wish to go. Success I believe will come with the effort so I really don’t mind which field they go in as long as it is not associated to things heinous and morally wrong like the porn or gambling industries, not to mention the illegal drugs trade and perhaps not to become beggars either, but begging might help deal with their egos if such a need arises. (For more information consult Imam Al-Ghazali’s works)

TeenDabbyWala, do we live in Turkey? We ate Turkey and want to visit Turkey together but no … perhaps you are associating hareem01’s name with the Ottoman harems … For clarification we live in the UK.

Milly it’s Mr Hareem here, that children’s book the one with the septic water goblin yes it’s still around, but I’ve been doing so much lately mostly involving being a taxi for the missus and doing the DIY that I have put my writing on the back burner. I did get a chance to do some more illustrations a few weeks ago.

Please bear with me or rather please pester me more and I may finish it quicker … :)

Orpheus you asked, “Who are the next 2 to be interviewed?” I’m not surprised that we bore you … however for that I solemnly apologise.

Aaliyakhan, did we meet on GS? That would be quite a story hey? But alas no we were already itched before then. I joined GS after helping hareem01 make some replies to our Hindus members on a specific topic.

Sweet i.f. – I’m quite cautious with your questions because you aren’t afraid of being naughty … well … how easily offended are you? Not very easily offended at all … I used to be … not anymore. The way I manage this is by realising that people either offend by mistake in which case they should be forgiven and given the benefit of the doubt, or they offend intentionally because of some internal hatred they are harbouring and need to get it off their chest. In the case of the latter they want to give me and want me to share in some of their anguish. I can’t allow that to happen. I feel sorry for abusive people, what torment must they be going through to be burden themselves with more sins by hurling abuse? Furthermore to be offended easily means that I am weak. On the other hand if someone is abusive or lacks respect with people who they aught to respect then I’ll let them know about it, without getting offended. I was uber angry last when I was in Ealing after a parking ticket had been issued to me for parking outside my own parent’s house, then when I was in a car park the same day someone came so close behind me that she got scared when I manoeuvred to park up that she horned. Then her boyfriend in the passenger seat started making a scene for no reason. I totally lost it and shouted continuously at them for why they were wrong and I didn’t swear at all, but it looked like they must have needed a change afterwards … whoops.

Ok you asked, “What sort of English music are you in to?” you see this is the sort of naughtiness I’m weary of … I’m currently battling with my ego regarding music as you can see in my blog. To even talk about it might send the wrong messages out … as you can see I curtail my musical interest as much as I can in public, because of the religious issues that surround it as a topic. Psytrance, hard house and breaks were my choice styles. Anymore questions on this will be ignored.

I do not intend my children to be sent to school just until their A-levels, backing up hareem01’s intentions. The major con in homeschooling for me is that it is often the cause of no home cooked food … however a slight restructuring is intended to solve that problem. Major pro – is that we get to see the fruits of our labour in the children … And we learn that intelligent life is more than the sum of what inputs you give. For a robot I would expect it to take my information and predictably churn out a result in a given manner, but children no matter how young – even the 2 or 3 year olds will process information intelligently and “add value” on their own and when they exhibit this it makes the parents marvel at them. We miss this when we send our kids to school because when we see kids do remarkable things we say “we didn’t teach them that … oh must have learnt it from school” – the kids themselves are seldom given credit. By homeschooling we see the effect of their intelligent processes kicking in and shining through.

Marmalade, how did we meet? Well one day I was visiting Pakistan I was about 9 years old and my auntie came along with her little daughter, she was nearly three years old. I used to dress her up and put make up on her and that was the first time we met. We are first cousins by the way. She was named to match my name. Her mother’s wish was for us to be married. We got married eventually nearly 6 years after her mother passed away.

$ehar my three most important wishes are that I am always kept within the “hizbullah” (not to be confused with the political-military movement of the same name), that my children become pious and hardworking, and that the material world is subservient to our hands whilst not entering our hearts. These would be the wishes that are secondary to the main wish – which is to be granted Great Vision.
Am I scared of death, not really, but I am weary of danger and concerned for my life because I need to serve my responsibilities on the Earth. Death is most certain … I just want it to be done in a good way. I know that Allah (SWT) is in charge of the affairs of people and my being here or not is not going to ensure my family are better or worse off, but I have that innate need to try my hardest and safeguard their future before I’m ready to go. I am deeply concerned with the torment of the trial and wish my errors are hidden on that day.
And for that reason I do consider myself hypocritical … however not really a hypocrite in the sense that I do not internally wish for the demise of Islam and pretend to be a supporter of it, Rather as Allah (SWT) maintains me like this I consider myself a strong supporter of Islam although my actions contradict my values at many times … So why am I on Gupshup? To be tested and improved (you all are my teachers) … and to do my duty – which is to be a salesperson for Islam in general but also to promote ‘good’ and encourage unity between Muslims with one another and between humanity in general – So long as Allah (SWT) enables this to happen.
About writing two paragraphs about myself I will write about the 2 facts but the paragraphs about me are already in my blog. What they do not contain is the fact that I have a birth mark on my forehead and when I get hot or angry it becomes prominent. Out of the four children my mother has had I was the lightest weighing in at only 5lbs 5oz. My brother was 7lbs 6oz, the first sister 7lbs 3oz and the youngest sister was a smacking 9lbs 13oz – MashaAllah kaho! :)

Sehrysh you wrote, “I'm totally cheating. You guys missed doing the chat interview, and all of us had tons of questions that went unanswered. Can you guys please respond to those questions please?” – The problem with this is that those questions were going to be asked by the interviewer. Some of those questions cannot be answered here also – I suggest you come up with another date for the chat interview, because there is whole different side to us outside the written response. My wife will kill me for suggesting this by the way.

Sister Niksik so what one quality of Hareem do I admire the most; it has to be her inherent desire to break convention and contradict trends. She is anti-sheep and subjects herself to criticism as a result for not being like others. She complains when people copy her, I tell her she should be chuffed that she is a trend setter, but more important to her than that is her self-identity and need to be unique. The best way to explain all of this in one word is “ambition” – she has a laser sharp ambition and will not budge from it.

Philosophy you ask why I say peace. Well I used to be a member of another forum before GS and learnt my habit from there. It is to show that I am not out to hurt anyone or hate them, but out of compassion I offer them ‘peace’ it is the best gift I can offer them over the net. If they were in my personal company I would offer them tea and to dine with me too. If I follow my teachings then if a person comes to stay with me as a guest then I am obliged to offer sanctuary and I cannot ask him why he is there until three days pass. I want to show that there is way of life that will bring the best state of affairs to the decent majority of people. I’m not saying that a pretender like me can offer anything like the example of some pious people I have learned to love because of their favours to mankind, but I can try my hardest to show that the world does not have to be the way it is.
My study in college (University) was Chemical Engineering; I was treasurer of the astronomy society there? I am setting up my own consultancy team, but whilst doing that I am working mainly as a Management Consultant in Quality Assurance in the Oil and Gas industry. My age is 33 years. I can type up posts fairly quickly when I my mind is at ease, but sometimes finding references can be arduously time consuming. It usually depends on the length of the posts that I am replying to …
I take information from a multiple number of locations and as you have mentioned in some of our conversations “Wikipedia” … LOL … Otherwise I remember things I have learned in my life and search for them on the net again to refresh or recap whenever a topic comes along that I recognise. This is for information … I don’t claim that I have any knowledge – that belongs to my superiors. I gain much of what little knowledge I have from all people and circumstance that my life subjects me to. It would be a bit weird for me to experience so much in life yet “learn” only what I read in books. Every step I take is a learning experience and can be a lesson to learn.
Am I welll-read? Not really … but I think I give off the impression that I am. LOL … It is important for me to make sense and be as clear as possible. I don’t intend to confuse anyone and the best benefit for me to be clear is so others can easily find fault in what I have said and told me about my error … this will help me rectify any mistake and hence I can improve as a person. I cook on a regular basis … yes. I also sing on a regular basis but my wife hates it – I’m not really a good singer, but I’m not tone deaf.
Good questions …

Pakwoman there are a number topics that were about us as a couple just check in Life1 so relating to them is not only easy but inevitable. LOL!
It’s weird but GS has a piece of my life. It is interesting how something like that can achieve this end. It has a similar segment of my life that my job has … I think that is the best way I can put it. It is not amongst my needed things but I choose to go on it mostly for learning and sharing.
Does love need marriage to survive? no for there is no marriage between mother and child and does marriage require love to last? … I would say yes, but never to make the mistake that the same type of love will last … love of marriage is a relay race … there is a different runner for each stage … if we try to get the first runner to run the whole race by himself he will lose. The love of attraction and lust is often the first runner, but he must never forget to pass the baton to the second and in turn the third runner.

Saby I wouldn’t call it stalking each other on GS and holding a grudge when you see a post you dont like, but my missus doesn’t like me posting straight after her … she needs her space.

Sazzie … What makes me happy? Fruits of hard work and effort – Reaching a goal that I set myself. Gives me peace? Dzikr and nature walks – (not naturist walks).
My favourite junk food item? – Southern fried style chicken thigh – but I have stopped eating that now due to health reasons. Most you've ever spent on an item of clothing? Two suits from Kuala Lumpur for £368 for the both of them open cloth. To answer where I would like to be in 10 years time is …
On my farm or estate inviting my friends for a spiritual gathering and serving them the best gourmet food made in our farmhouse kitchen and range stove and oven – and naans made in our garden tandoor – hearing that my eldest son has made or contributed to society where he has impacted it towards a positive change as a result of his actions and works and to have a couple of animals we call pets, for my parents to be pleased with me and my close family members moving higher in their goals and aspirations as well.

El topo you asked, “If we pitted you against each other in a game of chess, tennis, and mudwrestling, who would win each one?” That is a very strange question – I mean the answer is kind of obvious based on each of our interests so it doesn’t take much to work out the strong points of either part.
To describe our home in 5 words I would say “Work in progress potentially lovely”.
El topo about the Mastermind question I don’t think that I will be qualified to appear on that show because I don’t have good knowledge on the history of my subjects of interest. I don’t necessarily know who did what and when, but when it comes to understanding the subject matter itself I guess that would be easier for me to get to grips with. If I would have to revise then I would choose “The Development of the Islamic Creed” as a chosen subject but not that I am an expert in it, but it is something that I would like to study carefully enough to reach that end.
Other than that I would like to eventually get more knowledge in Astrophysics and Metaphysics. I don’t consider myself a specialist even in the field I work, but I am passionate about it and can utilise lots of tools (amongst them are NGT facilitation, PERT, NLP for business, business process mapping, auditing, fault finding and KPI analysis, procedure development) effectively. That’s the problem with mastermind – it focuses on the history of the subject and it does not really give an examination on the capability of the person with the subject content, except for a few questions here and there.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Masha Allah very nice answers,
Where is hareem baaji.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

Salam everyone, I’m gonna try to answer all the questions ASAP inshallah.

I love his fish&ackee with rice. A Jamaican dish.

no.

There were several reasons. I couldn’t find a good school of my liking, I wasn’t satisfied with the quality of education and behaviour training in schools, I feared bullying, I didn’t want my kids to have exams before the age of 14, I wanted them to learn for the sake of gaining knowledge instead of just for getting grades and good jobs etc. Also, I want to move around, take my kids to live in different countries and schooling is an obstruction for me.

I never regret homeschooling them and I strongly believe this is the best option but I do get fed up sometimes, but after not finding any alternatives I calm down and carry on.

I might send them to school at the age of 11 but that’s going to be a very different school from the rest. I actually found one in Acton in London area, it’s called Free School and it’s run by a group of parents and they have a classical curriculum. But I’ll see how it goes.

I want my 3 boys to have their own businesses for a living. My eldest wants to be an explorer and astronomer and middle one wants to become a Fireman. I think I’ll be happy with any job that is to serve humanity, don’t care how much money they can make as long as their soul and heart is satisfied.

No. We live in England.

I have no idea.

No. We were married in 2002 and I joined gupshup in 2006.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

  1. quite easily.
  2. I think last week.
  3. nothing in particular…anything that sounds good to the ears.
  4. not before the age of 11.
  5. I think psyah answered that already.

we are cousins so we knew each other but it was on his bro’s wedding in Lahore that we met after 10 years.

  1. I want to show my kids the whole world, I want to master several ancient and modern languages, and I want to remain muslim all my life and die as a muslim.

  2. No.

  3. Everyone is a hypocrite to certain extent. I think I act hypocritical when sometimes I’m nice to certain people when in reality I don’t like them.

  4. Why am I on gupshup? Well, I kinda like being in touch with current news and thinking of fellow Pakistanis.

  5. I consider myself an average Pakistani woman, though my parents and their parents were amazing. My grandfather from father’s side owned a whole village and when he died it was divided among his 6 sons (my father was the youngest) and a daughter. I grew up in a village near Rawalpindi and from an early age I could recognize all sort of crops, weeds and wildlife, I have killed several Scorpions and several times have seen people killing dangerous snakes. We had an orchard in our backyard and I spent most of my childhood on the branches of a Rubber Plant tree. I started playing with dolls for the first time when I was 11, before that I only played boy games. My great grandfather from mother’s side were in flower business and had gardens and fields of roses in Wazirabad, my Nani moved to Lahore after marriage and my mother married my father and lived in different places due to his job in army. My mother got selected as a member of local government counsil in 1990. One day I’d like to own a flowershop if not flower fields.

The chat actually went down for several days just before our interview but as psyah said we might do the interview again.

I still have the girl clothes I bought during my first baby shopping and I had a strong desire to have a daughter since recently, I don’t think I’d like anymore kids (boys or girls) but I think I’d be much more softer on girls.

I’ll be back with more answers soon, I was sitting here for too long and my boys started giving each other a haircut. :smack:

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

lol @ I was sitting here for too long and my boys started giving each other a haircut.

thats cute...

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

Am I? :hayaa:

no.

Yes

I love it.

usually classic fiction, and education, child development, history, war, language, spirituality in modern literature.

I can share everything with him without any hesitation.

hmmmmmm…can’t think of many things but I guess I’m not evil, I have a good heart like most people.

Yeah, and I like you.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

yeah few times inlaws related threads.

it has started to become important slowly with knowing few guppies in real life.

I think a marriage needs love to survive/last.

No to both questions. I have so many other things in life to hold a grudge against him.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Prayer/dhikr
piri piri chicken
£60
I'd like to be running my own business in 10 years time. Probably a florist or a wedding planner.

He'll win the game of chess and tennis and I'd win the mudwrestling. lol
psyah described the home perfectly i guess.
I have hardly finished the 4th chapter and I'm still reading it but I found the mannerism and antiquates of Acheans and Argives highly amazing, the way they serve their guests etc is quite similar to adab in sufi circles.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

I think I have answered all the questions. Thank you everyone and thanks Shak for inviting us.

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

good read - nice knowing you fellas ....

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Psyah, MASHAllah you sound really God-fearing and good-hearted person :)... I enjoyed reading your responses :)... thanks

Hareem, thanks for your answers :)..lovely stories... InshAllah you will manage to buy a flower shop...

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers–> psyah and Hareem

thanks for the answers psyah. we’re still at war. :devil:

hareem :hug:

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Re: Q&A: Zindagi aur Aap. Aaj ka Mehmaan: Answers--> psyah and Hareem

Great answers psyah and hareem :)