Do you want peoples thinking to change or do you want them to just cover up their thinking and pretend all is well? Do you prefer the honesty or do you lambast the frankness?
[/QUOTE]
It depends on what type of relationship I have with them, the closer it is the more honest comments I want from them. And those who don't really know me and have just met me once can just keep these type of comments to themselves because it does not matter to me what they like or dislike about me.
Munni, skin color is the least of this dodo-brain’s concerns. I mean, this scumbag was putting you down for apparently no reason whatsoever, unless you haven’t shared the entire story with us. I suppose there are jerks like him out there who have no clue when to keep their mouths shut. It’s their problem entirely, not yours.
Now as far as skin color is concerned, it’s true that the Pakistani community puts a great deal of emphasis on skin color, especially in relation to women. It’s just how the desi mentality works. I was reading one time that this mentality of light-skin superiority derives from the ancient Aryan mentality. When the Aryans invaded parts of Pakistan and north India, they imposed this racial and ethnic superiority structure onto society. Needless to say, this mentality still persists with full force even today. Mothers are always scouting out fair-skinned girls for their sons etc.
Do note though that Pakistanis define the term “fair skinned” pretty broadly. Fair skin can range from very pale to light olive-skinned (like me). Once you start going into the brown category, that is when the separation begins, I think. Then again, these are terms, thoughts, and feelings that our society has defined for entirely self-gratification purposes.
ok may be i missed yhe point compleatly?
but what has his lifting the shirt and showing you his skin got to do with him being put off by you?
Leave him but i think you need to get out of selfpity AND self indulgence. i think that makes it look that all the conversation is aimed at you. so dont be like this, and if i were you i would tell the guy if this place is so bad how come he still f@rt!ng around?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Roman: *
Munni, I do have a comment. I think you should be a bit more hard on people and start bashing people like the one you mentioned for a change. You "niceness" or "naivete" is unreal and comes off as pity-seeking.
Instead of asking for people's opinions you should have just gone ahead and called him a ch******. Try it, it's liberating.
[/QUOTE]
a THOUGHT.
How come is ok to dis a person for being nice or nieve? As if there is something wrong with them? Perhaps thinking? that they are stupid or something? Implying that they are easily taken advange of? and acting like they are commiting a mortal sin by trusting and being kind?
Why not dis the people that abuse peoples genuiness, friendliness, and kindness?
How come is ok to dis a person for being nice or nieve? As if there is something wrong with them? Perhaps thinking? that they are stupid or something? Implying that they are easily taken advange of? and acting like they are commiting a mortal sin by trusting and being kind?
Why not dis the people that abuse peoples genuiness, friendliness, and kindness?
[/QUOTE]
Thanks for not thinking there is something wrong with me. smile
If others wish to think I seek pity, etc, that is fine. I do at times perhaps, but not always. Lot of people(online) think my niceness is unreal, but its silly of people to think I am always nice, as I would readily admit I am not. But theres nothing wrong in trying to be nice to others, which I do try to be. And the people I come across in real life dont think its "fake or unreal", and thats what matters, because if it was "fake" they would know in an instant. Mash'Allah. But then I am not always nice to ppl in reality either. They are aware of that as well.
Other peoples opinions are something to consider. I take to heart that which I want to, and discard the rest. Atleast they share their views openly about me. smile
