Princess Meriam

Arts & Culture Culture, Arts, Literature & Linguistics
1

I saw a show on Oprah just a few days ago, and Princess Meriam El-Khalifa of Bahrain was on it, it was based on Eastern Practices and Ethics. I was wondering if anyone else was watching it.

If so,

What do you think of Princess Meriam with her American Non-Muslim White Husband, and how do you think Bahrain would deal with this.

In my opinion. I think it’s great that if they love each other that they’re together, however the way it was done is obviously not right, the way the media jumped on it, and tried to make muslims and arab countries look bad wasn’t right.

For the rest of the show, I was quite offended on the way they had made Arranged Marriages and Indian/Pakistani traditions look evil and corrupt based on the account of two indian women (trying to speak for the rest of society). Although, I personally wouldn’t go for an arrange marriage, however I know arranged marriages do work if done in the modern way (ie; couple choose their mate, they meet, gets engaged perhaps date and get married if they wish). But as for my parents. They were arranegd, and they’re perfectly happy. So, I don’t see why Westerner’s have to jump against something they simply don’t understand.

Arai

2

Arai, my thoughts xactly! I unfortunately saw t/ last part of it, but whatever I was able to watch, I got a very negative impression about t/ Muslims, t/Arabs, and well t/ whole culture & it’s treatment of women in general & ofcourse t/ tradition of arranged marriages. While I cud never see myself in an arranged mariage, I have my parents, relatives & freinds who have gone t/ ‘arranged marriage’ path & are blissfully happy.

I guess these idiots confuse “arranged marriages” w/ “forced marriages” which is haram in Islam.

I personally see no harm in parents setting you up, both parties involved talk & chk each othr out as well as thr families (as much as possible w/in t/ confines of 'arranged situation")& if they feel comfortable, go for it! My frnds did it, so did a lot of my other acquaintances. Beats meeting in a bar in a drunken stupor, that’s for sure

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif

I wanted to ask them one question, in a country where there is no concept of an arranged marriage, w/ every1 choosing thr own mate, why is t/ divorce rate over 55%??

Not every arranged marriage is perfect & same goes for t/ non traditional, not so arranged marriage! It was definitely a very biased, one sided show. But I guess they have to do that, cuz her Asylum application is still in process.

3

What do you think of Princess Meriam with her American Non-Muslim White Husband, and how do you think Bahrain would deal with this.<<

Both of you haven't fully stated your opinions about pricess's wedding with a non-muslim however, u have written an emotional account on how media has potrayed a negative image of eastern traditions and culture.
I don't blame the media because the opportunity to bash the culture is provided by the princess herself. At the same time I don't blame the princess either cuz she followed her instincts and did what she thought was right for her. Analyzing the issue from beyond the boundaries of religion and traditions, I think nobody (American media or Bahrain) should have any problem with what the couple chose for themselves.

Also, I don't agree with the stats provided by Funky desi regarding the divorce rate in America to support arranged marriages issue. The divorce rate in pakistan is not high because of various reasons but thats a different topic altogether.

ciao
BoSS

4

Grass is always greener on the other side. I can bet you there will be a story in 2-4 years about a divorce. I hope not but this marriage is doomed from the start. She is a princess and a rich one, she cannot handle day to day grind of a military life. Its just a thing that looked good to her out side of her daily routine. And one more thing Bahrain is a Islamic country but Islam is not the first thing on there minds if you know what I mean

5

Wasn’t Bahrain known as Ayashi ka adda of all arabs…(before Dubai took over this ‘glorious’ title). There is this bridge which connects Bahrain with Saudi Arabia, and the first shop which come on this side of Bahrain is… u guessed it right … its a liquor store!

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif

Kher, that was just a side note on the musalmani of Bahraini rulers and their families … now you can discuss with a better perspective

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Boss: Frankly speaking I have no problems if she wants to marry a non-Muslim guy. I have a few acquaintances & friends who are Muslims & decided to marry a Non - Muslim guy, altho thr kids are being raised as Muslims. I must also point out that these frnds are mature adults who have carreers of thr own, not some teenager, let alone a minor, trying to escape some family rules they don't believe in. Big difference. T/ stats are common knowledge & quoted on CNN & other reputable shows quite often.

I do agree that t/ girl will be killed by her family if she EVER decides to return to Bahrain. Since she has decided to chose this path, I would sggst she gets back into school once she is setteled aftr t/ asylum hearings, to have something to fall back on if nothing else.

7

Even if we chose to sideline the islamic and cultural aspects of this, still, legally, she was a minor in Bahrain, and it was still illegal for her to have left. Add to that, the marine would be charged with kidnapping and rape, since he took off with her and married her before she was 18. And mind u, the under 18 thing is disallowed in numerous US states as well. The fact that he lived in nevada made it easier for them to go through with their shotgun wedding.

As for the girl, she was shown to have plenty of freedom in Bahrain...and Im sure she did as well. This was not about freedom, or about escaping from the clutches of oppressiveness....this was merely about catering to your personal desires. Well...she went for it...more power to her. But now she does not have the right to criticize Islam or eastern culture for her sinful move.

She eloped and got married underage, and that too to a non-muslim. These sins and undeniable. And now she is trying to shore up support in an attempt to mask her mistakes and sins by making rounds of Oprah.

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By the way, from a strictly moral and religious point of view (not legal)... what is 'underage'...?

I thought when a girl reaches puberty, she can be married, from an Islamic view-point.

(This is for Eastern Analog)

9

According to Bahraini law, below 18 is underage.
According to Islamic law, yes, a person can get married once they attain puberty. But what other Islamic law did she follow for her to stake claim to this one? Its not about pick and choose.

In the movie, she was shown as citing the example of Hazrat Khadija RA, who contracted Prophet SAW as a trader, and then took the initiative in proposing to him, and then got married to him. She cited this example, yet ignored every other islamic ettiquette. Its not about pick and choose. She cant choose what Islamic aspect she likes, and ignore then ones she doesnt like.

As far as culture is concerned, she didnt even give her culture a chance. She had a handsome amount of freedom, as shown in the movie. She was allowed to go to school, wear western clothes, not made to wear a veil, allowed to go to theaters and watch movies. She didnt even give the culture a chance. She didnt consult anyone before she took that huge a step. So she cannot blame the culture either.

Bottom line, she made a disgraceful mistake, and now is trying to mask it by portraying Islam and bahraini culture as oppressive. and the media is assisting her very well.

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Boss said: Analyzing the issue from beyond the boundaries of religion and traditions, I think nobody (American media or Bahrain) should have any problem with what the couple chose for themselves.

I have talked about the movie and it’s various aspects in “Shor Sharaba” section, where I have mentioned that if this was a 17 yr old, a ‘minor’ American girl (not to mention if she belonged to t/ likes of Kennedy or t/ Bush family) running away from her parents, her country w/ a Muslim guy, there would have been an International outcry, calling upon t/ respective Govt. not only to hand over t/ girl but also t/ Muslim guy for punishment. It’s hypocrisy/ double standard!

I have told you how I feel abt inter religious, marriages (as if they care!). The crux of t/ matter is she was 17 yrs of age! Under age, a minor escaping her problems, which quite frankly, every girl in t/ Universe has!.

Boss said: Also, I don’t agree with the stats provided by Funky desi regarding the divorce rate in America to support arranged marriages issue. The divorce rate in pakistan is not high because of various reasons but thats a different topic altogether.

It was just last month CNN reported the 55% stats. But just cuz you asked, I have some sites for you:
http://www.vix.com/pub/men/nofather/articles/usa-marriage.html

“The study by The Council on Families in America, a self-described group of 18 non-partisan scholars and social historians, said the percentage of married adults decreased to 62 percent from 72 percent between 1970 and 1990. It also said 50 percent of first marriages are likely to end in divorce.”

Folowing sites show divorce rates anywhere from 40% to 60%, Nationally & State wise:
http://www.divorcereform.org/nonus.html
http://www.drdaveanddee.com/cohabitation.html

Yes, Pakistan including other Eastern cultures does have a low divorce rate, & that ‘would’ be an entirely different subject! My point was nothing is perfect. No arranged marriage is 100% a guarantee, & nor is a non -arranged type marriage. Eventually, it takes 2 committed mature adults. Where none of t/ involved is a ‘minor’ trying to escape t/ bindings of our Eastern culture!

Peace maker: Just curious, How old are you? Is a 12, 13 yr old girl ok to get married to? And by t/ same token, a 15-16 yr old boy too wud be ready for marriage??

11

Interesting links Funky Desi.
I didn't know I would be reading about divorce today though :)
EA's and your point about the girl being a minor is valid...but not from the percpective of princess and others who hit the road for Vegas. :)

ciao
BoSS

12

there was/is a lady in pakistan who wrote a book( i forget the name and the lady) but in it she interpreted a hadith which talked about marriage and puberty. the arabic word that was used for maturity also stands for when a person is able to support themselves and a family. she took it to mean solely as to reach puberty. many pple thus regard getting married in islam is when u reach puberty.

so many muslims in history were well mature by age of 16. there was one who led an entire army at age 17. i know many pple who are mature enough at 13, 14 years old, and i have 1 friend who was actually married at 15. in this age, the “requirement” for stabilizing urself is education, degree and a job. so it depends on the individual and what they are exposed to, and how the parents treat them either as mature individuals at age 13 or as children at age 13.

go to www.oxygen.com and click on the oprah link to voice ur opinion about the Princess Meriam thing

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-mehndi