Predicting threshold of filing for divorce in a woman

[Reha]

Re: Predicting threshold of filing for divorce in a woman

@decentGuy

When evaluating a potential rishta, different people look for different things, it’s their right. As far as attitudes toward divorce are concerned, what harm is it if both sides can try to figure out that in each other beforehand. The problem is, that the rista meetings are so formal and this talk is so dreaded that it is never discussed so I’m trying to understand if there are some polite ways with which we can make a guess about the other party’s views regarding that. I just wanted to focus on such ways for men’s side in this thread. But totally realize that there are similar concerns for a women’s side as well.

The reason your approach is flawed is…

Divorced people on their own are perfectly fine people. Its the combination of those two specific individuals that leads to divorce.

I am divorced and now remarried. When I was dating, I met a couple of people who turned out to be ex’s of my friends. It was strange. So awkward. But I kid you not, you’d never be able to tell if any of the stories I’d heard were true if you met them in a coffee shop like I did. They were normal, great, educated, polished, etc. They had as much to dish out as my friends did on them. And this happened a couple of times…my community was very large but also very tight knit. It was hard not to know someone through someone.

What I am trying to tell you is…marriage is the ultimate gamble and risk. If you are trying to take a calculated risk in marriage, you’ll be disappointed. The only thing you have control over is you. You have to make up your mind to try hard and be a good partner. Its rare to be able to judge whether someone will want a divorce in a formal rishta meeting. Unless they walk in tarred and feathered with a sign that says “I am crazy”, you’re pretty much gambling.