Who mentioned education would eradicate these problems. We have graduates from foreign universities here who are talking mumbo jumbo. It’s a shame that these people are so blinded by the jhalat they have watched on ptv deeni programs that they can’t even rationalize right from wrong.
As human beings you have the right to procreate but that doesn’t mean you are not accountable for the innocent life that you bring on this planet. Planning& preparation is important for anything that you do in life and having a baby is no exception.
You cannot have a good night’s sleep with someone and nine months later put God on the spot for giving you the right to procreate.
I agree plans fail…you financial condition is not a straight line graph but being oblivious of your responsibilities as far an innocent life is concerned is awful, pathetic, pitiable and horrendous crime that you can ever commit.
sambrialian, every parent does provide for their child in their own capacity. children infact can become the biggest motivation for their parents to work harder and earn more so they can provide better :-) a bigger family, more people, more life in the house, more happiness in the house....these could also all contribute positively to things.
i feel like some things are spiritual and should be left to Allah :~) sometimes the kids can become waseela for more rizq in the house too.
i'll get back to what hiccup was saying, that maybe its not right for us to judge others by our scale and say that so and so did not provide properly for their child, because we all have different standards about this.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by irem: *
sambrialian, every parent does provide for their child in their own capacity. children infact can become the biggest motivation for their parents to work harder and earn more so they can provide better :-) a bigger family, more people, more life in the house, more happiness in the house....these could also all contribute positively to things.
i feel like some things are spiritual and should be left to Allah :~) sometimes the kids can become waseela for more rizq in the house too.
[/QUOTE]
I sincerely hope that the first para is what happens for this family.
this waseela stuff I completely disagree with. there's no such thing. this concept of falana brought luck or money with them makes no sense to me at all.
no offence intended of course. hope no hard feelings? :)
You are correct, fayz made some excellent points, and it’d be much appreciated if you acknoledged my well justified quota of insults hurled in your direction too.
So far as your mantra of “no offence” intended goes, sounds like you are getting saddle sores from being on your high horse too long.
Next time you deem yourself to be intelligent enough or even qualified enough to proclaim in snobbish tones about who and who does not deserve what-so-ever, please think again.
Your tone is extremely condesending, insulting and very much offensive.
But despite all that, I hope you and your future children have a long and prosperous life.
I think what sambrialian meant and is refering to given her example is that it really makes no sense how someone who is totally irresponsible for themselves can possibly be a good parent?
I don't think it has to do with how much money you have but raising a child is definitely an awesome responsiblity and commitment and should not be taken lightly.
Working with kids myself I have seen everything good and bad.
There are kids who come from really troubled homes and have parents who really don't care at all and it just makes me so furious! The things those poor kids go through OMG!
Then there are kids who come from the most 'perfect' homes where they supposedly have everything and still they are a mess in an entirely different way. The parents are too... I dunno.. liberal or something and think the kids should be allowed to raise themselves?!
I think the most important things you can give a child are teaching them how to think and believe in themselves. Everything else.. there's no guarantee. Money comes and goes.. the people you love could die ..anything could happen!
sambrialian- Yeah I know what you mean though. When I was in Karachi our neighbor had 2 wives and 20+ kids and there were more coming all the time!? lol
Man those kids were their own little army! None of them went to school or could read, they all wore torn dirty cloths and they were completely wild!?
hmmm...the waseela thing, isnt actually as illogical as it sounds...there is some logic behind it...like you know how they say that the wife brings luck to her husband...i think it could be that if she's understanding, cooperative, supportive and encouraging, then her husband will have peace of mind to concentrate on his career more and provide better for his family...
actually, in my extended family everyone has big families, only some of my cousins, very few, who recently got married believe in family planning, warna in my family that concept is not really prevalent...so maybe my thinking is biased....but i always feel like the bigger families are the more happier ones and that happiness consequently is a motivation for everyone to succeed as well.
as for irresponsible parents...a parent of one child can be irresponsible too innit, whats the level of responsibility got to do with the number of kids, i think its more about the parent's personality and maturity level.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by waqas72: *
sambrialian- Yeah I know what you mean though. When I was in Karachi our neighbor had 2 wives and 20+ kids and there were more coming all the time!? lol
Man those kids were their own little army! None of them went to school or could read, they all wore torn dirty cloths and they were completely wild!?
[/QUOTE]
exactly. why would you have dozens of kids if all you were going to do was dispatch them to other people's houses? what for - social work?
irem, the number of kids is just a secondary issue. like you said, some people might be too immature and irresponsible to even have one kid and that's what I'm saying too. I'm sure we'd agree on a lot more things if you'd seen the family I'm referring to here. :)
anyway, thanks to my ADD I'm quite bored of this topic especially since I'm not going to be placed in this kinda situation any time soon. I just wanted to open a thread in Family & Health like all the cool people and to see what it feels like to start a thread in here. and lemme please say that it feels very good. :-D
Acha, first it was poor people. Then poor people with no jobs. What's next, poor poeple who are also jail inmates? Dekho, there ain't really any aalmaana faazlaana point there in your post so cut it. You ain't the great sociologist you thought you were.
Your premise doesn't match the example, or vice versa.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by farah_no: *
And about education, what more could you be educated about if you are Quran hifz, there is no better knowlegde or education in the world than this.
[/QUOTE]
Farah, hifz is not education. The majority of people doing hifz in the sub-continent area don't understand Arabic at all and thus don't know what the Quran actually says. Memorizing the whole Quran without understanding a single word is like a donkey watching a movie.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Roman: *
Dekho, there ain't really any aalmaana faazlaana point there in your post so cut it.
[/QUOTE]
I never claimed that I had a point. I didn't understand the mindset of this particular gentleman and hence, I posted here. I'm not a sociologist and never claimed to be one.
waisay, all this speech about having a aalmana faazilaana point is quite rich coming from someone 90% of whose posts are homoerotic one-liners. what is one supposed to learn from your posts, oh great art film critic sahib? the meaning of life?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by irem: *
hmmm...the waseela thing, isnt actually as illogical as it sounds...there is some logic behind it...like you know how they say that the wife brings luck to her husband...i think it could be that if she's understanding, cooperative, supportive and encouraging, then her husband will have peace of mind to concentrate on his career more and provide better for his family...
[/QUOTE]
Irem, I don't understand you, on the one hand you put out the image that you're a very good believing woman, but on the other hand you talk about nonsense like luck and waseela. There is no such thing. If you were to pick up the Quran and actually read it, you would come to the conclusion that EVERYTHING is part of God's plan. Nothing in existence happens without His will.
If a wife seems to bring luck to her husband, it is the will of the Almighty to make that a happy marriage, luck has nothing to do with it.
ultrareligious and illiterate? if theyre ultrareligious they shouldve persued education, its a fard, secondly if hes so religious why the hell isnt he providing for his family?
i know of what kind of people you are talking about, my family has had many bad experiences with the sort, we treat everyone nicely and help as much as we can, but is they dont start helping themselves they arent going to ever change
try and set an example for the child if your going to be around him long enough, but noone but the ppl themselves have a right in deciding if they want children or not, thats wholly and totally up to them
lekin leaching off of others is totally wrong if your completely able to earn yourself, its never too late for education, try pushing that man in the better direction - for the sake of the child at least
I never claimed that I had a point. I didn't understand the mindset of this particular gentleman and hence, I posted here. I'm not a sociologist and never claimed to be one.
waisay, all this speech about having a aalmana faazilaana point is quite rich coming from someone 90% of whose posts are homoerotic one-liners. what is one supposed to learn from your posts, oh great art film critic sahib? the meaning of life?
[/QUOTE]
I never claimed to make any. But you did. Your post is argumentative in nature. Take my advice and tum bhi start using one liners. Might make more sense.
Irem, I don't understand you, on the one hand you put out the image that you're a very good believing woman, but on the other hand you talk about nonsense like luck and waseela. There is no such thing. If you were to pick up the Quran and actually read it, you would come to the conclusion that EVERYTHING is part of God's plan. Nothing in existence happens without His will.
If a wife seems to bring luck to her husband, it is the will of the Almighty to make that a happy marriage, luck has nothing to do with it.
[/QUOTE]
Hmmm. Do I put out the image that I am a very 'good believing woman'...? I wish I was. I don't want to wash dirty laundry in public but let me tell you that I'm very very very far from being a GOOD...BELIEVING...woman...unfortunately...
:/
But just to clear the point I was trying to make :) I was just saying that this belief that the wife brings 'luck' does have a basis in logic. that was my point.
