PLZ HELP ME

[Ishi88]

@happyheart

hi

well its not easy, to put into words “that” what is in your mind and heart. You did a very good job the first time dont worry about it please.
Well my humble advice would be the following.
As it seems the guy you are in love with is really nice else guys from Pakistan are jumping to leave Pakistan even if they have to drop their parents and family into the gutter.

So far my opinion is that he is a good guy with genuine intetions and he really loves you and respects you and is telling you that he has a real problem.

You must understand that eventhough you are willing to take care of him and his family woh ahsaan mand nahin hona chahta and for a good reason i think.
So many times it happens jab koye kissi peh meharbaan ho (even if its a family member) woh sari zindagi show off kartay rehtay hain keh its bc of THEM that others are setteled in UK or abroad. I am not saying that you or your parents are like that but aise hota hai.

I cannot disagree with your parents either. if i would have a daughter to mein bhe yehi faisla karta and larke koh UK bulaata so its all not every easy.

Dekha jaye to larkian aksar larkeh ke paas jaati hain. Wether its in our culture or western culture its almost the same yeah dunyaa ki reet hai wether one likes it or not its a fact.
So shaadi keh baat they still will be your parents and you their daughter but aap ne apne husband ke saath hi rehna hai.

I know someone frm Holland a girl who was born and bred in The Hague she decided to live in karachi after she got married. I know life is not easy in Pakistan and things are bad but 180 million people are living in Pakistan and surviving. And most of them are not as fortunate eough as you that are very well off and can buy a nice house and live at a place where you are save.

Do also understand (which you do as you said) that in our culture (asian culture) as the only son you are responsible for your sisters and that is not a bad thing. So he feels responsible and that means he will be also responsible in dealing with you after you get married with him.

I think you should compromise with him without that you can’t solve this problem. Aik haath le aur doosre haath de.

You should go to Pakistan and live there and after few years after the sisters get married you can always come back to UK aur yeah baat aap ke future husband ko maani parhe gi because you are sacrifising so much for him.

As far as your parents are concerned they can always come to Pakistan to see you and you can go to UK whenver you want of course all depending on financial siuation i dont know about that only you can tell.

So mohtarma the secret word is COMPROMISE.

you people thought that Ishi88 was incoherent but what about my post ? lolz
I really hope you get what i mean Ishi88. Best of luck.

Thanks alot 4 ur valuable advice

He really iza sweetheart…jitne tareef kero utne hi kum bes itna keh sakti ho k i am really lucky to have him aza partner

Alhumdo-lliah em not 1 ov doz ppl jo kesi p ehsan ker k ussay yaad rakhtay hy ya ussay sari zindage tannay martay hy
AND…agar daikha jay to is mai ehsan wlai koi baat he nahe
Us say meri shaddi hogi n aza biwi mera poora farz bunta hy k mai us ka khayal rakho n ussay piyar do
Uk anay k bad woh Job karay ga inshAllah n apni savings mai say yeh sara khercha uthay ga HOWEVER em goona help him as much as i can

I COMPLETLY agree wid u ere…us nay b muajy yeh baat kahi hy but meri majboori yeh hy k mai apnay parents k khilaf nahe ja sakti

His sister is 15yrz old at the moment
But wateva u said iz nota bad idea either

The thing is woh apnay parents n apnay mulk say by-hud piyar kerta hy…He will leave me but heZ not goona leave his parents
He said to me k Allah na karay agar hamari shaddi na ho saki to mai zindage bher shadi nahe kero ga
Meri nend mera chain sab khatam ho gaya hy …khuch samajh nahe a raha k kaya kero mai