Planning your child's schooling

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Hi All,

I am in a bit of a fix but am positive you all will be able to help me out:)

I am in the process of planning my son’s schooling, decisions will have to be made over the next few weeks so that I can book places since we know it can take years before we manage to get a place in. I am so scared coz I am feeling I am already pretty late with this whole thing.

So please advise me on how you selected your child’s Preschool, then Primary School . What factors you kept in mind.
I am going to be putting him in Private schooling at some point. Not sure how early. But what would your recommendations be? When is the best time for the child to go private schooling?

Right now, I need to book him into Preschool nursery. the reviews I am reading on local nurseries each one has a gazillion good things to say about them but I am unable to find a list that has been rated on performance factors . Or am I doing this the wrong way?
I want to be able to shortlist at least 5 nurseries and then start visiting them to see the difference.

What advise can you all give me please?

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Have you visited any preschools? We just picked out a daycare for my LO, he will inshAllah start next month (if everything else stays the same.) I and hubby visited 5 daycares and 2 preschools. The decision was VERY clear once we visited them all. The few things i considered were:

  • cost
  • how they provided us information (one of the director at a preschool was extremely rude and provide minimal information)
  • i want my LO to take food from home - some daycare didn’t allow that
  • reviews from close friends and neighbor
  • teaching programs
  • how they updated the parents of their teaching (weekly reports vs. no reports.)
  • how long had the teacher been there (the one we are sending him to, all the teachers had been there since it opened 6 years ago.)
  • how many teachers per class
  • indoor gym? (Houston weather is crazy…so i wanted to make sure they had an indoor option for the kiddos.)
  • the feel of the place and the staff.

We plan to send LO to Islamic school/private or charter school for elementary level at least. I believe the base has to be solid. If you don’t learn proper grammar, spelling from the start you higher education will be weak. Of course there are people i know who were never introduced to English until 8th grade and now have an MBA from a great university here in the US.

Also talk to your neighbors and ask around.

Hope this helps.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Thanks Rabia, Certainly the pointers are very valuable and will help me in making a decision .

Still waiting for more friends to share their knowledge on the subject please ..

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

I can give my thoughts later.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

We did what Rabia did.

We narrowed it down to 3 preschools/daycares based on what we had read online. I made appointments with all 3 and asked if we could spend half a day there to check it out. No one minded that. We chose the preschool for our daughter based on our and her experience during the day. At one place I really didn’t like the staff, they were rude and rushed through our questions and concerns so they were out. The other 2 places were great! Loved the staff and they had plenty of extra activities (like music class, gymnastics and even science!!! For 3 year olds!!!)
It came down to price and location, since she was only attending half days.

I would say do your research. Read online reviews. Try to visit and spend a day. Make sure to notice how the staff interact with the kids. And if you can try to reach out to other parents who have kids there.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Thanks Stoppit, would be a pleasure to know your thoughts on the subject

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

I would add it is important before you begin the search to know the type of schooling you prefer. It is not just private vs public. Many people opt for charter schools, Montessori, other schools with focus on arts/creativity. Oh and most tours we got focused more on the entire facilities, admins, etc and we spent very little time in the one actual room our son would spend most of his day in…so be ready to ask to spend extra time in the actual room.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

my personal view is that a school even a pre-school should have a curriculum to follow. most good schools have 10-15 mins of different activities designed for the entire 3-4 hours that children spend there . this makes them learn without getting bored …even free time to do your own things should have a time slot allotted.

arts & creativity is important but I feel what is most important is that school provides an atmosphere of competition believe me children excel & learn alot when they are competing with each other offcourse the competition should be a health & constructive competition. Also , when i was choosing school for my daughters what i liked was that they work on each and every tiny details for example climbing stairs , washing hands , eating , sitting , speaking , reading , walking etc.

teachers being polite & kind , hygiene , clean & colourful class rooms , clean toilets , spacious structure etc are a must !

best would be getting feedback from parents whose children are already there , this is the best way to find out how the school is

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Thanks Guys , really helpful replies. Th nurseries here in the UK that are registered have to follow a structured learning programme. So thats not a problem , its just that I am not able to find the league tables and the ones that I have seen , there is just too much criteria in there and I have no clue which criteria is the best one to go for .. just too much confusion

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Sorry CB, inshallah I will write later. You do need a UK perspective.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

^ I was thinking the same thing. A UK perspective would probably help CB more. US system is very different when it comes to schooling/preschool.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Yes Stoppit , UK perspective is what I am ideally looking for , so yes , waiting and waiting anxiously for your response :flowers:

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Hey CB my son just started his pre-school so I’ll tell you what I did, as you know all UK Nurseries comply with the EYFS structure which helps children under 5 years of age to develop & prepare towards school. Also all nurseries etc are regulated by OFSTED. Best thing is to go on ofsted’s website and find local nurseries/day centres/childminders. Each nursery would have an up to date report on how well they are or which areas they lack in.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Thanks Guriya, I am already aware of it and going through ofsted website , but its the next step that is worrying me , I want private education for my child , some say its best that we give them a good start , others say its ok all nurseries are the same .. some have advised me that its best to get the kid in a school with a nursery so that its easier to get on the ladder ..

Confusing element is the criteria in the league tables , how do you tell which school is the best eventually? the one that has majority students with excellent grades or the ones that have excellent result in maths and English .. how to go about planning this whole thing

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Hey CB, it seems you are considering a private school for your child at a young age. What are your reasons/motivations for wanting private education at primary level? If I can understand what you are after, I might be able to advise more appropriately.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Thanks Stoppit, I am stuck between private or state education,. I went to public school myself and the little I remember , I dont see anything special in that education , I want a more structured approach to education for my son. Also the city I am in right now doesnt have too many schools that produce even 90% as compared to other schools across UK . So I am seriously bending towards considering private education for him.

Now the motivation is solely to choose an institution which will help him get excellent grades through out so that he makes it to the likes of Oxford, Cambridge etc .. That may only happen if he is trained and educated in schools that teach the necessary skills to excel at that level. Public schools in my city dont teach them.

Moving South is strong option on the books but may take some time since all our business set up is here for the moment and its not easy to just pick up and move .. so might take 5-7 years ..

People guiding me are telling me that schooling wont matter , you can introduce private education later , but some who are very education conscious about kids say , private educate from the start is what you need to get your kid on the right track .. I am confused between the two.

The freaking postcode is driving me nuts too… we dont have any good schools in our postcode , the one I like is 45 minute drive out of my city ! But I am not bothered ,I will take the plunge as long as education is good , but for that I have to register with them now so that I get a possible chance of getting on when son gets that age..

So yeah, these are the issues going on in my head right now and I think I need a perspective from someone who is really education conscious and knows what it takes to get into a top class university ultimately in the future .. I just want him to be able to fight the competition and find the right schools for him at the right time.

Please tell me what your thoughts are , if I am being unrealistic in any way , please do correct me , I need some ground realities . Schooling was different when I was little , plus I dont remember most of the stuff that my elders would have thought of while educating me , so thats a long shot !

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

This isn’t finished but it’s as far as I’ve gotten:

So your top priority is ensuring he has a solid education and will do well in exams so that he can get into top institutions.

Just a quick note before I continue. In the UK:
Public school = Private School, children sit for entrance exams in Year 6 to gain admission (11+ exam) and sometimes into Year 9 )13+). Not as competitive as Grammar schools in general, although there are exceptions.
State/Comprehensive school = Government run Secondary School
Prep School = Private Primary School
Primary School = Government run Primary School
Grammar School = Government funded selective school, children sit for entrance exams in Year 6 (11+ exam) and they take the best performing students. These generally top league tables.

So your reasons are not unlike those of people like my parents, uncles, aunts, what my own would be, my cousins etc.

There will always be people who will say that it doesn’t matter where your child goes to school, it’s their intelligence and determination that matters. And yes, there are people who will do excellently despite studying in not-so-good schools, through their own hard work, but they are a minority. Whereas in the high ranking schools (most of these will be Private and Grammar schools, although there are some State Comprehensives that are exceptional), even average students will manage to do fairly well.

Conversely, there will be those who say that Private education from the early years is best. My personal overall experience of those educated in private education from the early years is not positive. There’s usually a snobbish attitude, a sense of entitlement and difficulty getting along with different types of people. People are generally more rounded individuals when they have had broader experiences. It is also the case that everything levels out at Year 7. In both Private and Grammar schools, the Year 7 intake will be a mix and the children who went to Prep school are generally not better educated or equipped than those went to a regular primary school.

I thought that perhaps you yourself were considering private school for the primary years (5-11 years) and I wanted to understand what your motivations were for that, but it seems it’s only from the recommendation of some other people.

Amongst my own immediate family, my cousins, friends, we’ve had pretty much all manner of experiences. Personally, I have had one of the more varied experiences because we moved around so much when I was younger. I’ve been to extremely rough primary schools in London, private school from 11-16 and Grammar school for A-levels. We then settled to live in an area which is known for having a high number of Grammar schools so that my siblings could all start Grammar at Year 7 (one of my brothers was already travelling 1 hour one-way by public transport to get to his school in this area). My khala did the same. This entails a lot of study and tuition to prepare for the 11+ exam but it usually pays off.

The general consensus was in my parents generation and still is for this generation in our extended family, that Grammar schools are the first choice. Reason being that the environment is one of excelling despite your background. Okay, most children will come from middle-class backgrounds but most generally have hard-working parents who weren’t born into money. Everyone there will have achieved extremely high marks in the entrance exam and is used to working hard. Your place wasn’t gained by your ability to pay high fees. You are not going to judged on your house or what car your parents drive in the same way that children in private schools are subjected to; if you aren’t wealthy, your child will have a tough time, if you are wealthy, it’s hard to stay humble in that kind of environment.

This is not to say that private schools don’t have their advantages, there are many. Grammar schools still have to follow the national curriculum throughout. Private schools will fall into line for GCSE and A-level but from Years 7 to 9, you will find they teach a lot more in terms of subject and depth. More languages, classics, Latin, science as separate subjects right from Year 7, more physical activity. I was a book-worm anyway, but I can’t tell you how many texts and Shakespeare plays we had read and analysed in just those three years. The fuller timetable is facilitated by the fact that the school day is much longer, 8:30am to 4pm in general. Obviously, they will have better facilities as well.

Most parents who hope for their children to go to Grammar or Private for secondary will still send them to the local Primary school and instead provide the ‘extras’ themselves. So, after school activities, private tutoring etc. Even if your child goes to a Prep school, they will still need to be tutored for the 11+ exams because of the competition for places.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Stoppit, Thank you so so so much , you have no idea how much this has helped me . The extremely valuable insight is definitely what I needed and has now helped clear the confusion .

So I have shortlisted a few Prep Schools for son. I still dont know if I must look for some kind of a league table? ( similar to that of secondary schools ) How to establish they will be able to provide that polished and groomed environment for the students which will help them get into a Grammar School eventually?

Cant thank you enough and will be looking out for your help every now and then :hugz: Its so hard to find like minded people when it comes to Academic matters and believe me I am taking on board everything you said knowing very well that our families share the same kind of passion for education , makes me feel I can get right guidance :k:

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

Glad I can help. In regards to the bold - by Prep schools, do you mean Private Primary or just Primary level schools (state run)? Prep school is actually the former.

Ofsted rating is about as far as you can go for state primary schools .. even though I would take this with a pinch of salt. I wish our Milly was here to tell you what she thinks of Ofsted. The league tables for secondary schools are based on exam results. Although children do take SATS in primary school.. to rank schools by SATS results is not fair or helpful for children of that age. Classes will be mixed ability and the results will always reflect that. The important thing is, is the teaching and environment good and will it help get the best from my child? As I mentioned either above or in the other thread, you will still need to teach your child outside of school time, or hire a tutor, regardless of how good the school is to prepare them for 11+ tests.

As for a polished a groomed environment… Grammar school admission is purely on the results on the 11+, they don’t interview pupils. Private schools sometimes will hold interviews.

Having gone through this for my 5 siblings and my cousins who are the same age as my siblings, the single most important factor is what you do at home.

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Re: Planning your child’s schooling

can’t really add much more to what stoppits has said, but i would really like to emphasise her point about what you do at home. i went to a state school from primary all the way to a levels and did reasonably well because of the effort i put in. with my siblings though, one of them i tutored and the other had that work/study ethic at a state school to be able to do decent enough to get into a grammar school/IB.

personally, i know a few people who have gone through private schooling and didn’t really see a great deal of a difference when it comes to how well they can achieve (of course this again depends on the atmosphere at home). i guess they may have leverage when it comes to oxbridge but there’s no doubt that a grammar school education can still get you there or at any russell group university. it’s cheap, doesn’t come with the snob-ish pvt school attitude, requires your child to work hard and gain through merit.