Planet of the Apes: Secrets Revealed
- Silicon-enhanced chests and lips reveal that humans are not only “as innovative as they are cruel,” but pretty vain as well.
- Wahlberg’s neglect in removing his shirt through the entire film reveals his kinship with the teen demographic: BACKNE SUFFERERS.
- Fox Marketing Department determined that the ideal garment for a young ape’s human pet is a peach-colored dress.
- All inflamed baboon buttocks in the film were edited out.
- Most extras were actually disgruntled gorillas out of work since the movie Congo.
- Kris Kristofferson’s surly acting style is a result of the neverending pain of Millenium’s failure at the box office.
- The imagery of the Ape army’s red tents taken straight from Biblical writings dealing with how women were separated from the tribe during their periods. (Charlton Heston’s idea.)
- Helena Bonham Carter’s clothing came under-budget through some seamstress’ creativity and Rue McClanahan’s wardrobe. Her wildly trendy haircut however, accounted for %15 of the film’s budget.
- According to ape acting union, the ‘Ape’ Lincoln Memorial had to be scrubbed down with monkey feces in order to get rid of foul human odor.
“The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.”