Frauds remember the nobel prize winner (hawkings) and no less who broke up after several decades of marriage. Women talk a lot about a perfect world but only when its not them. Not that men dont do the same thing but I think we are much more blunt about saying its not a perfect world.
well apparently a friend of mine has this major crush on a guy, he lives in the same town, i often see him he uses a wheel chair, quite good lookin i must say.. is always smilin never seen a girl with him, now my friend, forget i should not :)
Sharara crushes are crushes, just think about it. If you saw a most charming and wonderful guy but say one of his hands only had two fingers and everything else about him is fine. The disability is not even really very limiting. What would you say if he asked you out or proposed?
Things are always easier said then done and I include myself in there as well.
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*Originally posted by hmcq: *
Sharara crushes are crushes, just think about it. If you saw a most charming and wonderful guy but say one of his hands only had two fingers and everything else about him is fine. The disability is not even really very limiting. What would you say if he asked you out or proposed?
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hell yeah!!! given that i really really like him, i would not take into account his missing few fingers!
Sharara you are an exception then, otherwise I would not see so many disabled guys without wifes. The issue is not really really like him but how does a person get to really really like him if at the begining there is an instant rejection of that idea through a stereotype we have created.
Its like the way I see desis treat blacks. Our preconceived notions would prevent us from even considering such a possibility that the person has virtually no chance. Sure if you get to know the person then its great and you may really really like him but almost always our first judgements are based on what we have set up as filters, and more often then not unless we have personally been humbled into similar situations, these filters are based on our preconcieved notions and predujices. This does not mean there are not people who dont think otherwise, but most often then not most people would reject such people.
btw could not respond to your pm since its filled up :).
Maybe you are right..
ive emptied the inbox :)
hey everyone... thanx for ur responses :)
hmcq.. this person im talking bout is actually my cousin...
i personally dont think there is anythign wrong with a disabled person getting married.. and the person who accepts the disability is a far greater person than the one who talks about it..
i dont raelly knwo what i would do if i were in a situation like that.. as in if i was the girl... i love him to death.. he is an amazing person... i truelly believe that when Allah Mian makes a defect in a person.. He places 10 times more beauty in replacement... its just the way life is..
neways im bit sad at the moment... the girl doesnt know about his disability.. im gonna try and talk to her and see if she wants out..
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*Originally posted by sadzzz: *
neways im bit sad at the moment... the girl doesnt know about his disability.. im gonna try and talk to her and see if she wants out..
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This is really depressing sadz.
Please tell the girl asap and let her decide for herself. Also, ask the guy…I am very much interested in his thoughts towards marriage as well.
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*Originally posted by BoSS: *
This is really depressing sadz.
Please tell the girl asap and let her decide for herself. Also, ask the guy…I am very much interested in his thoughts towards marriage as well.
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im more than 100% sure he was forced into it.... there is no way he would have agreed to it unless some emotional torture was displayed..
im afraid for both of them now.... something i was so happy bout has turned very very sour..
sadzz what you have said pretty much makes my point. People only hide information that they feel would be detrimental to them. Ask the gal and find out what she really wants.
hmcq.... he didnt propose himself.... his family did it
howz that possible, hes engaged to a girl who doesnt know about his disability 
that is SO not fair!
sadzz I did not mean him but his family
sadzzz, does an ailing heart come anywhere near to your definition of disability?
I have seen this happening in reality. One of my professors in Pakistan was physically disabled and suffered from polio when he was 3 or 4 yrs old. He was the only brother after 10 consecutive sisters, so he was not only the ladla but also very handsome guy of the family. He did masters in Organic Chemistry and was very honorbale professor in PAF college. oh well, time for marriage came and they couldn't find any grl for him just because of mild disorder that he couldn't walk properly. Eventually, one of his classfellows was introduced to the family who had loved him for long and then ended up getting marry. Mashallah the grl is very pretty and decent and they make an excellent couple. We have had some family terms with them, so I know how much trouble they went through in finding a grl for him. I remember his sisters used to cry whenever they visit us that they can't find a grl for one and only brother and his parents passed away for having a "arman" of marrying their beloved son, but "dare aye durast aye" and he found a wonderful mate. May Allah keep them happy forever n ever. :-)
Hopefully, your cousin and his wifey will be happy and would make a fabulous couple. Best wishes for them. :)
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*Originally posted by hmcq: *
sadzz I did not mean him but his family
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yeah i know... sorry hmcq for the silly reply...
i dont understand his family.. even though they are blood.. why is it considered so bad? they should just tell the girl.. and if she doesnt want to marry him then fair enuff... Inshallah someone better will come along.. Inshallah
Gemini the great... thats a very specieal story... my cousin got it when he was 5.. and his whole body was paralysed.. which wrecked the growing of his bones.. lekin with his eagerness.. and help from God.. he's walking and doing everything he wants.. thogh he walks funny and looks kinda odd..
Roman... that is a true disability hehe
sadzzz, are you into helping disable people or what?
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*Originally posted by Roman: *
sadzzz, are you into helping disable people or what?
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yes with ur kind of disability..... im a pro at that..
sadzzz, does that mean I can finally find cure and relief in your hands?
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*Originally posted by Roman: *
sadzzz, does that mean I can finally find cure and relief in your hands?
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maybe.... :) what exactly have you been diagnosed with?