my phophi is so jelaous with my mom and we bros and with me n my sis..
i dont know what problem she has..she never behaved good with us…and my dad loves her most ..she is like godess for him..she pretends and behave good with us infront of my dad… she really made good image of her infront of him…he always listen 's to her even if she lied he think he is the only person who is right…
we never told dad that that she is like that because i know he wont understand and dont believe on us…and gher ka mahol khraab hoga..i didnt vist her from few months ..now he is keep asking me to visit her at her home and i dont wana meet her..if in any case will go their she will meet me weirdly ..make bad faces and all …but i cant tell him all that and i dont know whta to do now if i didnt go he will scold me and angry on me BUT I DONT WANA GO AND SEE HER FACE..
take photos of bad faces and show your daddy. take a tape recorder in your hand bag too.
I still wonder if someone has tried using tape recorder/video camera to get evidence on nasty in-laws/family members. Has anyone at all tried using these methods to prove to a non-believing husband the asli roop of his mom and siblings (in the event that they're truly horrible people)????
Anyhow.......Suhaina.........if you don't want to go, then is it possible for you to get your mom to go with your bro/sister to Pooh-Pee's home?
Go to your Pooh-Pee's home........get the sawab from Allah for maintaining relations with her. What goes around tends to come around.
Maybe the next time you visit Pooh-Pooh.......and she makes those strange faces..........just be a considerate achi bachi *and innocently ask her, *"Pooh-Pee......aap is tarha kyoon dekh rahin hain? Kya aap ki tabiyat to theek hai? Kya aap humain dekh kar khush nahin hain? Kya aap naaraz hain? Bataiye na! Hum aap k bhai ki family hain.......aap apne bhai ko itna pasand karti hain.......to bhai k family se bhi bahut mohabbat hogi... aur hamaray saath comfortable feel karna chahiye. To bataiye na, kya baat hai?? " ;)
^Make her feel uncomfortable for making those weird faces toward you.
If she has always been closer to your dad...........then maybe she was JEALOUS/INSECURE from the day that your dad married your mom. Maybe, she thought that your mom (the bahu) was stealing your dad away from her. Or maybe she thinks that your family is better than hers. Who cares! Just be polite.......and ignore her most of the time. Aik kaan k andar.....doosray kaan se bahar. Aur agar thori si himmat ho........to kabhi kabaar.......kuch chalak questions pooch liya karo.........like the example I gave above.
^Lol, I haven't RV but after a particularly nasty incident with my MIL, both my husband and father, (separately) berated me for not being on the ball enough to hit record on my phone.
^Lol, I haven't RV but after a particularly nasty incident with my MIL, both my husband and father, (separately) berated me for not being on the ball enough to hit record on my phone.
WHAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your husband actually urges you to trap his mom through technology???? Lucky you! There should be more of guys like him.
No offense, but I berate you as well. Had you done it........you'd be telling us of your MIL's reaction after hearing her screeching voice played back at her! Then we'd know how effective the strategy is. That said, do remember to hit the record button next time.
my phophi is so jelaous with my mom and we bros and with me n my sis..
i dont know what problem she has..she never behaved good with us...and my dad loves her most ..she is like godess for him..she pretends and behave good with us infront of my dad... she really made good image of her infront of him...he always listen 's to her even if she lied he think he is the only person who is right...
we never told dad that that she is like that because i know he wont understand and dont believe on us...and gher ka mahol khraab hoga..i didnt vist her from few months ..now he is keep asking me to visit her at her home and i dont wana meet her..if in any case will go their she will meet me weirdly ..make bad faces and all ...but i cant tell him all that and i dont know whta to do now if i didnt go he will scold me and angry on me :( BUT I DONT WANA GO AND SEE HER FACE..:(
Some facts you can never change.........
1) She is you Phupo, Your Dad's Sister. And I'm guessing you dad must have high regards for her for some reason. Try and look into that.
2) Why is she jealous of you? Is she just a jealous person by nature or there is something in you guys behavior that drives that from her? Think Deeply.
3) No matter what, the bottom line is that she is your phupo and it won't kill you or your ego if you go and meet her up. Think about it! It will only make your dad happy and you a bigger person by forgetting whatever negative feelings she might have given you.
Always try and rise above situations. I know its easy said than done but atleast in family matters one should never involve ego. Family is the most important thing in life so value it and cherish it before its too late for that.
WHAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your husband actually urges you to trap his mom through technology???? Lucky you! There should be more of guys like him.
No offense, but I berate you as well. Had you done it........you'd be telling us of your MIL's reaction after hearing her screeching voice played back at her! Then we'd know how effective the strategy is. That said, do remember to hit the record button next time.
lol, i know. it did cross my mind but i just felt it was beneath me and by the time i was at breaking point, she had said her worst stuff.
my husband knows i don't lie and that i'm never rude to his mum, so when my mil went to my fil with a completely made up version of events and hubby was defending me, he wished i had taken evidence to put an end to it once and for all.
i'A there won't be a next time!
anyway, yea, a good strategy as long as you know the person who will hear the evidence won't get more angry at the fact you took it!
I have same phupo as yours! The are pain in the ass.. She hated my mother, cursed her, accused her and what not. When we grew older we forced our mum not to tolerate such humilation from her and stop meeting her. My dad knew what his sister was like so things were easier for us. My younger phupo is good though and we enjoy her company a lot.
I dont know if you should go or not, but if i was at your place i wouldnt go knowing how she would behave with me.
My nutcase phophi loved her brother (my biological father) so much she ruined his marriage.
She then went onto ruin his second marriage and the lives of his 5 children (not including me as we left the situ).
Bottom line, if your dad thinks shes a saint its going to take a lot of evidence etc to even get your dad to consider shes a monster.
don't worry suhaina...there will be a day in your life when phopo jaan shows her true colours in front of your dad, just wait in hope.
our phopos were like this and dad would not tolerate a word said against them, as we grew older my dad saw them for what they really were, it took about 20 odd years but that day will come,
The truth be told i feel sorry for my dad and wish he didn't see this side to them, as it has really hurt him
for now just taal matol your dad and tell him you will go around when you get the chance, but whatever happens dont hurt your dads feelings by telling him you don't like her, i think we should leave that our mums.
Sometimes I think it's so interesting how, as children, we're so oblivious to the drama and dynamics of relationships with extended family members. You're so busy playing and running around........you may not comprehend sneaky snide remarks.........and if you do, you can't be bothered to care. You tend to think well of most people......or don't care enough to have a strong opinion. Plus, when you're a kid, your parents don't talk to you about difficult relatives.
And then you grow older........and it's like you WAKE UP. And you start seeing relatives in a more clearer light. For some of them........it's like their true colors start showing up here and there. Maybe they had some subconscious negativity toward you.....buried deep within them......that even they weren't aware of........and then one day.......that scorn/disdain rears its ugly head and manifests itself. It appears in their body language......comments.....actions, etc. All those things.......that weren't evident to you before as a kid. It's good that you now have the awareness so you can be more careful.....but it's also sad.
my phophi is so jelaous with my mom and we bros and with me n my sis..
i dont know what problem she has..she never behaved good with us...and my dad loves her most ..she is like godess for him..she pretends and behave good with us infront of my dad... she really made good image of her infront of him...he always listen 's to her even if she lied he think he is the only person who is right...
we never told dad that that she is like that because i know he wont understand and dont believe on us...and gher ka mahol khraab hoga..i didnt vist her from few months ..now he is keep asking me to visit her at her home and i dont wana meet her..if in any case will go their she will meet me weirdly ..make bad faces and all ...but i cant tell him all that and i dont know whta to do now if i didnt go he will scold me and angry on me :( BUT I DONT WANA GO AND SEE HER FACE..:(
BUT I DONT WANA GO AND SEE HER FACE..
She’s horrible, smelly, never cleans her house and has dishes every where.