People skills, or rather the lack of it!

[Reha]

Re: People skills, or rather the lack of it!

@Niksik

I’ve noticed this a lot in women that they say something really insulting to your face and later try to justify it by saying, “oh our hearts are so clear that we say what’s on our minds,” or that “oh I’m just a straightforward person.”

Personally I think that the above reasoning shows lack of people skills and general etiquettes. The art of connecting and relating with people is learning how to say the right thing at the right time and most of the times shutting up where it is unnecessary. A lot of times, messages can be conveyed effectively without the use of disrespectful tones and appearing superior.

It is not being smart to say whatever comes to your mind but knowing when to shut up or how to use basic people skills. Some people think that it’s being hypocritical.

What’s your opinion on this?

I kid you not, I was putting together the SAME topic right now!

They say things like “hum to saaf baat karte hein” or “humko khul ke baat karne ki adat hai” and really do believe that anything aside from this is “doghlapan”.

I had a similar situation a few months ago and it made my blood boil because you can say anything you want…literally anything you want if you bother to word it politely. There is nothing wrong with using a bit of manners and practicing self control when you open your mouth.

This is how I handled it…I was mad…maybe it was wrong but this is what I said:

“apko itni khul ke baat karne ki adat hai to hum apse khul ke kehrahe hein ke humko apki adatein achi nahin lagti hein…baat karne ka tareeqa har insaan ko ana chahiye hai…jisko nahin ata hai vo saaf dil nahin…badtameez hota hai”.

And I walked away. They WERE being disrespectful and trying to cover it up by saying “hum khulke baat karte hein”. I’m SO sick of people blurting things out under the guise of “hum to saaf dil hein, hum dilon mein burai nahin rakhte hein, moon pe kehte hein, blah blah blah”. In my opinion, its an excuse to be as rude as you want and then try to sneak out of the consequences.

There is NO excuse for bad manners.