I have a lot of people in my in laws who suffer from this trait. How does one deal with this behavior? Is it better to tackle it openly and honestly (a method I prefer) - even if it leads to “conflict”, or to match it with passive aggressive behavior myself? (this is not my personality and I find it depressing and exhausting to act this way) - for the sake of “peace”, which is actually not peaceful, but wrought with tension and insincere feelings.
Any input will be appreciated!
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
I have a lot of people in my in laws who suffer from this trait. How does one deal with this behavior? Is it better to tackle it openly and honestly (a method I prefer) - even if it leads to "conflict", or to match it with passive aggressive behavior myself? (this is not my personality and I find it depressing and exhausting to act this way) - for the sake of "peace", which is actually not peaceful, but wrought with tension and insincere feelings.
Any input will be appreciated!
if u confront them openly there will be explosions .. just ignore them or try to avoid over socialization with them ..
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
Let them be.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
I also dont appreciate passive aggression but i feel that sometimes letting thing go is definitely better than confrontations. you have to judge based on the situation. sometimes a word that has not yet made it through your tongue better be held back than spoken outloud.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
The way I see it, those who engage in too many passive aggressive behaviours don't have a desire to change how they are dealing with others. So, confronting them is just unnecessary.
The best thing you can do is just ignore them, or "kill them with kindness" so to speak...that way even negative thoughts about you could shift if you're nothing but kind and considerate.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
I'd just avoid them altogether...they can be as passive or as aggressive as they want.
I am just here to meet, greet and eat.
:)
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
Don't say anything but stop meeting them all together. They will get the hint and straighten up.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
Thanks for the responses, everyone. I understand this way of thinking but it saddens me that I will be the one who is perceived negatively by avoiding these people; I can expect to be accused of acting anti social, aloof, keeping my husband away from his relatives, etc. While the culprits stay on their pedestal, continuing to get away with their behavior scott free.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
well, have you made an effort to reach out to them to counter their behaviour with kindness? if you don't want to be perceived as anti-social by ignoring them, then maybe you need to make them your best friends instead. that way, they won't have anything to be p/a about. and maybe you might get to know them better so you can see if they're truly being p/a or if they're just as confused by your behaviour as you are about theirs. plus, the closer you are to them, the more honestly and sincerely you can speak to them about the way they go about things and maybe that will lead to more and better open communication between you and them.
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
you needle them. :D much funnnn
Re: Passive Agressive behavior
Thanks for the responses, everyone. I understand this way of thinking but it saddens me that I will be the one who is perceived negatively by avoiding these people; I can expect to be accused of acting anti social, aloof, keeping my husband away from his relatives, etc. While the culprits stay on their pedestal, continuing to get away with their behavior scott free.
You can make your efforts because you should...that is the right thing to do in such cases.
But how long will you continue to let it bother you? There is a time when you either give them a dose of their own medicine or stop caring.