Re: parents need to teach their chidren
My parents are Eastern and we were taught to greet the hosts, to not touch the host’s things without their permission, to not run wildly through their home or to jump on their furniture, nor to impose ourselves in any way. For each dawat, I remember my mom laying down the rules before we even left our home …and my mom never had to give a lambi chori explanation because her stern tone and glance were more than enough.
Apart from my own parents, I have seen other “Eastern” laug set boundaries and rules for their children and nieces/nephews. As an educator, I have found the “Eastern students” consistently well-mannered.
So, thank you …LP…for bringing up the important point that one should not tar a group of people with the same brush…also known as “stereotyping” …and such a mindset does jot reflect “maturity” either.
Anyway, I have taught 3rd grade enough times…students that are 8-9 years old. And people who are not educators tend only to come across a few 8-9 year olds either only in their own immediate/extended family or maybe their social circle. But as a teacher …I have taught close to 50…8-year-olds in one school term before…and lemme tell you…kids that age can be a handful and MashaAllah se I have good classroom management. And you’d be surprised at how just ONE rambunctious 8-year old can be like the equivalent of 5 kids in ONE body…that’s how challenging and disruptive to the entire class just **one to two kids **can be. I have been shocked by the the things that I have heard from a few 8-year-olds…shocked by the “maturity” of their attitude…in that a few of them know too much for their age and act like teenagers in tiny bodies.
Sometimes even parents…(including non-Eastern parents) can…in a** tongue-and-cheek way**…(slightly joking/exaggerated way) remark that they feel like giving their kid away on ebay…or will throw them out of the house…but they don’t mean it literally.
There are many details that we don’t know about the OP’s niece; there could be more to the story…before we rush to “castigate” her as a bad aunt. My best friend has a younger brother who throws tantrums and has kicked her …and us a manipulative menace…because boundaries were mot set for him. Same best friend has a nephew who is spoiled and listens to no authority because his parents did not set boundaries…he will not listen to any gentle or firm disciplining from any aunt/uncle/nana/nani/teacher/nobody…because all he has to do is scream and create a scene and mom will be by his side to give him exactly what he wants and she won’t take kindly to any person scolding/preventing her child in any way. So yeah…folks…there ARE cases of difficult nieces and nephews; they DO exist. Let OP come and clarify things before assuming the worst about her.