i was just up tonight thinking about my parents. since i married and moved away, i don’t get to see them as often as i’d like. i think about how to care for them when they are older. i have a sibling who’s trying to take on that responsibility, but we’re still trying to sort out logistics and it’s very hard(like managing/affording elderly health care).
i am losing time with one of my parents…my father’s forgetting more and more everyday. i wish i could do something to bridge the gaps. i try sending photos and call as often as i can, but conversation just grows sad. what do people do in these situations?
Barysh, I can imagine what you must feel. Try to go and meet them as much as possible, have them over if you can, send things to them, take them away sometimes, etc.
its really hard barysh.. when i got married and moved to a country thousands of miles away, i felt like i had been cut out of my family's life.. we still talk on the phone everday nearly, use the internet, share pics of every stupid small thing we did... but its not the same as living with them or sharing their physical lives... and before you know it, they are old, you have missed out on everything going on with them. and then they die.
it really bothers me at times and we try our best to do it all.. but nothing matches being with them in person and taht like u said, is not possible. i can at most go once a yr for maybe a month or 2 months. tahts it. so sick.. how thats gonna be how it is for the rest of our lives.. seeing them so little.
i envy girls that live in teh same city as their folks, or even in the same country.
Barysh is there a way for you to bring over your parents for an extended period of time? I am not sure of your school schedule but if you can manage it and your parents can stay on their own while you are in school, you can have the rest of the day with them.
Webcams are good but Ira suggested something pretty interesting. Have them over for a mini-vacation every so often?
Im so sorry about your predicament...I think about leaving my parents and get sad too. I dont even know what you are going through but I hope you find a way to overcome this distance barrier and see your parents more often. Inshallah.
With the medical assistance care my father needs now, I'm not sure if he's able to reside in my state...especially with me not working right now to support such a necessary lifestyle.
i'm not sure if i'm in a position to ask my hubby to take on dad as well. our marriage is still new and i'm not comfortable in asking him to take on a financial burden now either. i luv hubby and he's great..it's just tricky, you know?
i'm looking into part time jobs and found some last minute cheaper fares online. inshallah maybe that'll help so i can see my folks a bit more frequently.
Bharysh, are you in the same country as your parents? I hope you find a way, and hope everything works out and you get to spend more time with them. Also, it should be very comforting that you have a sibling taking care of your parents.
i agree with psquared...webcams are awesome!!
also...send them pictures...cards..homemade videos...visual stimulation will work a lot better than phone calls...in your case..and of course..visiting helps too :) not always the cheapest way..but if money is not a problem..you should visit them often..or have them over..
good luck.
I moved to another country after getting married and sometimes I am sleepness at nights cuz I am worried about my parents and their future. In our family, I am kind of the one who keeps my siblings stuck to each other and try to resolve their issues and when it comes to parents, I am just so worried about their old age and who will take care of them.
Hubby's parents are older and taking care of themselves so far but me being the only bahu will take care of them in the future so i feel so divided between my own family and my in-laws family...
sometimes if the phone rings at odd hours I get so scared that something terrible might have happened....